Sarah Palin and the vampire press conference
*This is a joke, it is not serious to any Sarah Palin peeps that may be offended relax and laugh a bit*
I was at a Halloween party this weekend and they were watching 30 Days of Night (vampires take over this town in AK where they get no sun for 30 days) and I started thinking in my head about how Sarah Palin would act in a press conference after finding out it was vampires that wiped out almost a whole town under her watch
Please laugh ^-^
Reporter 1-Gov Palin what would you have done to stop the vampire hoards from killing almost everyone in town Barlow?
Palin-See this why we need to keep the war going because now the terrorist have the forces of the undead at their beck and call and we have proof that the vampires may have come from Russia because of the funny speech thing they had going on.
*Reporters all look at each other confused.*
Reporter 2-Please tell me what you would have done to save these poor people?
Palin- And this is another reason why everyone should have a gun handy in case the vampires come a runnin around and killin' folks.
Reporter 2-They were vampires not moose!
Palin-Eh, vampire...moose what's the difference? You shoot it enough it will fall down.
*Reporter 1 face palms*
Reporter 3-If Russia is so close to the Alaskan border shouldn't you have seen the vampires coming?
Palin-It was really foggy that day and unlike those Twilight vampires they don't sparkle in the sun they way I thought they would. They just kind of burn and turn into ash when the sun comes out which is why five people made it out alive.
*Reporter 2-She knows Twilight is fake right?*
*Reporter 1-She believes that teens don't have sex because you tell them it's bad what do you think!*
Reporter 1-What plans do you have in places in case the vampires come back to Barlow?
Palin-See out of this horrible event is the chance for job growth which is key to getting the economy back on track and stopping the terrorist and illegal immigrants. McCain and I agree that a new branch of defense needs to be made that is even scarier than the CIA and wiretapping. We're still deciding what to call it but you can betcha they will be scarier than a bulldog with lipstick and they will be allowed to water board these new terrorist because that thing with the rights of war criminals doesn't apply to the undead!
Reporter 2-What the hell does that have to do with anything! They're undead they don't need to breath!
Palin-We'll use holy water!
Reporter 3- Oh my god I think that is the smartest thing to come out of her mouth this whole campaign.
Palin-If that doesn't work maybe that global warming thing will fix those undead, un-American, freedom hating bastards!
*McCain in a backroom-WHY DID I PICK HER GOD!!!! WHY DID YOU LET ME DRUNK DIAL ALASKA!!!!!*
God-Because it was funny!!!!!
I was at a Halloween party this weekend and they were watching 30 Days of Night (vampires take over this town in AK where they get no sun for 30 days) and I started thinking in my head about how Sarah Palin would act in a press conference after finding out it was vampires that wiped out almost a whole town under her watch
Please laugh ^-^
Reporter 1-Gov Palin what would you have done to stop the vampire hoards from killing almost everyone in town Barlow?
Palin-See this why we need to keep the war going because now the terrorist have the forces of the undead at their beck and call and we have proof that the vampires may have come from Russia because of the funny speech thing they had going on.
*Reporters all look at each other confused.*
Reporter 2-Please tell me what you would have done to save these poor people?
Palin- And this is another reason why everyone should have a gun handy in case the vampires come a runnin around and killin' folks.
Reporter 2-They were vampires not moose!
Palin-Eh, vampire...moose what's the difference? You shoot it enough it will fall down.
*Reporter 1 face palms*
Reporter 3-If Russia is so close to the Alaskan border shouldn't you have seen the vampires coming?
Palin-It was really foggy that day and unlike those Twilight vampires they don't sparkle in the sun they way I thought they would. They just kind of burn and turn into ash when the sun comes out which is why five people made it out alive.
*Reporter 2-She knows Twilight is fake right?*
*Reporter 1-She believes that teens don't have sex because you tell them it's bad what do you think!*
Reporter 1-What plans do you have in places in case the vampires come back to Barlow?
Palin-See out of this horrible event is the chance for job growth which is key to getting the economy back on track and stopping the terrorist and illegal immigrants. McCain and I agree that a new branch of defense needs to be made that is even scarier than the CIA and wiretapping. We're still deciding what to call it but you can betcha they will be scarier than a bulldog with lipstick and they will be allowed to water board these new terrorist because that thing with the rights of war criminals doesn't apply to the undead!
Reporter 2-What the hell does that have to do with anything! They're undead they don't need to breath!
Palin-We'll use holy water!
Reporter 3- Oh my god I think that is the smartest thing to come out of her mouth this whole campaign.
Palin-If that doesn't work maybe that global warming thing will fix those undead, un-American, freedom hating bastards!
*McCain in a backroom-WHY DID I PICK HER GOD!!!! WHY DID YOU LET ME DRUNK DIAL ALASKA!!!!!*
God-Because it was funny!!!!!