Huh.
Well, it's been some time.
This website isn't what it used to be, but it was literally my journal for many years. Whenever I'd think of an image I wanted, it's been easier to come here and grab it, instead of searching through multiple external hard drives. Every single image I've ever posted is saved. Tens of thousands, if not hundreds of photos. So sometimes I get to walk down memory lane just for a second.
Not too long ago, I logged in. I had forgotten the sheer amount of entries - private, filtered, friends only. Mostly private. Incredibly detailed. I'm someone that reluctantly avoids the past, I think. But on the other side of the same coin, I've documented it SO heavily that it's hard to separate myself from it. Reading old entries from 10, 12, 15+ years ago dredged up emotions I had totally forgotten about and I realized if I can't separate my feelings from those of a very young version of myself, I probably still have some growing to do.
My life is very, very, very different than some of the last entries I wrote. Some of those days felt impossible to survive through. I don't know if I'd be here without them, though. I don't think Dom and I would be where we are now. We are still together, 12 years later. We've lived in Seattle for about 5 years. We have a cat named Watson. The pandemic brought us a lot closer. We got engaged on an empty beach in August 2020. Put simply, we're really happy.
By logging into Livejournal, I felt rewarded. I was able to read every detail I'd shared from the very moment we met. I had forgotten about the apology texts they sent me in 2008 when we tried to date and Dom fucked it up (lol sorry but it's true), but I wrote the entire exchanged down in a private entry. I had forgotten about the night Dom showed up at my door at midnight (barefoot, in pajamas) in 2010 and begged for my forgiveness, but I had detailed everything Dom said to me immediately after it happened. Thank you, little Jessy.
It made me realize that I just kinda miss this outlet and I'm going to journal again, because I didn't realize how much of my life had just like... exited my brain.
So, idk. Maybe I'll post photo dumps again. I post them on instagram sometimes but my website is kind of a crapshoot with an outdated portfolio. My usernames on ig are parrty and jessyp.jpg
I don't know how much longer the images on this journal have since Photobucket emails me on the daily threatening to delete them unless I pony up, but if I see them start to disappear and I can remember what it's a photo of, I'll replace them with a more solid image host. If for no other reason than it's a pretty detailed archive of my life haha.
Cool cool. Love ya
JP