something makes you think a bit and then
I read something in Caddyman's journal and it made me think a bit about me - self absorbed thing that I am.
I never thought of myself as being competitive. I thought that needing to win was something that other people had a problem with until a conversation with Pax Draconis made me really look at myself.
We were discussing how some people like to win and I said that I was not competitive, I never needed to win and then I saw the expression on his face and stopped talking.
"You are the MOST competitive woman I have ever met" he said - and here's the thing. I could not deny it. My mouth would not form the words because my brain was actually saying "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, told you"
I muttered something like "really, I didn't think I was" but he knew that the words had hit home.
I have thought about it a lot since and realised that it is only the politically correct climate of the last twenty years that is making me feel guilty about wanting to win. There is nothing wrong with competing for things. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be first. The thing we have to elarn is to accept that someone else might be better than we are and to be able to congratulate them sincerely and without malice.
I am learning to do that. I don't have a problem with being beaten as long as the winner has done it fairly.
I think there has to be competition so that standards can be at least maintained, without that edge people get complacent and those who are doing the work or whatever can't be bothered because there is nothing to show for it. Everyone needs to win occasionally - some of us like to win more than others.
waffling now so it's time to stop.
I never thought of myself as being competitive. I thought that needing to win was something that other people had a problem with until a conversation with Pax Draconis made me really look at myself.
We were discussing how some people like to win and I said that I was not competitive, I never needed to win and then I saw the expression on his face and stopped talking.
"You are the MOST competitive woman I have ever met" he said - and here's the thing. I could not deny it. My mouth would not form the words because my brain was actually saying "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, told you"
I muttered something like "really, I didn't think I was" but he knew that the words had hit home.
I have thought about it a lot since and realised that it is only the politically correct climate of the last twenty years that is making me feel guilty about wanting to win. There is nothing wrong with competing for things. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be first. The thing we have to elarn is to accept that someone else might be better than we are and to be able to congratulate them sincerely and without malice.
I am learning to do that. I don't have a problem with being beaten as long as the winner has done it fairly.
I think there has to be competition so that standards can be at least maintained, without that edge people get complacent and those who are doing the work or whatever can't be bothered because there is nothing to show for it. Everyone needs to win occasionally - some of us like to win more than others.
waffling now so it's time to stop.