(no subject)
Ok so you guys were there tonight so why even write about it?
Things that are pleasing:
+Sal is being real nice to me now and I'm glad we're beginning to have an actual friendship. Sure took long enough jeebus
+I get to draw up plans to design kim and sal's new love palace. My body juices are ready.
+Hi Benny!!
+I've been seeing everyone and I can handle it.
+I'm organizing my life. Whatever shitpieces block my path can be completely knocked out by positive thinking. But I'm still considering new antidepressants again, couldn't hurt?
+I'm making a tabloid
+It has been easier to think about my pops instead of automatically balling my eyes out. I'm beginning to remember him fondly and enjoying it.
+Being able to connect with people again without anxiety all up in the convo. Being able to CONCENTRATE on a convo without thinking "oh god what is this person thinking about me. I'm too this or that, I'm terrible". Sometimes I can't think or focus because these thoughts are so loud. It's not true, anything negative is a waste of my precious time.
Things that could use some work:
+Me letting go of the past- I'm trying
+Not being completely honest about my feelings. I need to learn to trust again. Only this time be able to recover from trust and not constantly fear being betrayed. Seriously kids, that was hard for me to even type as a public thing. I'm not going to delete it or make it private. It's out there.
+My mother temporarily being a jerk, eh I love that lil woman whatev.
+Not saying the following words ever again: Hot, tight, retarded, gay, homoassbitch, fag, bank. I love those awful lil phrases but even I think I'm a dummy for saying them.
Dana- I think you gave me your stomach ache after you left.
Things that are pleasing:
+Sal is being real nice to me now and I'm glad we're beginning to have an actual friendship. Sure took long enough jeebus
+I get to draw up plans to design kim and sal's new love palace. My body juices are ready.
+Hi Benny!!
+I've been seeing everyone and I can handle it.
+I'm organizing my life. Whatever shitpieces block my path can be completely knocked out by positive thinking. But I'm still considering new antidepressants again, couldn't hurt?
+I'm making a tabloid
+It has been easier to think about my pops instead of automatically balling my eyes out. I'm beginning to remember him fondly and enjoying it.
+Being able to connect with people again without anxiety all up in the convo. Being able to CONCENTRATE on a convo without thinking "oh god what is this person thinking about me. I'm too this or that, I'm terrible". Sometimes I can't think or focus because these thoughts are so loud. It's not true, anything negative is a waste of my precious time.
Things that could use some work:
+Me letting go of the past- I'm trying
+Not being completely honest about my feelings. I need to learn to trust again. Only this time be able to recover from trust and not constantly fear being betrayed. Seriously kids, that was hard for me to even type as a public thing. I'm not going to delete it or make it private. It's out there.
+My mother temporarily being a jerk, eh I love that lil woman whatev.
+Not saying the following words ever again: Hot, tight, retarded, gay, homoassbitch, fag, bank. I love those awful lil phrases but even I think I'm a dummy for saying them.
Dana- I think you gave me your stomach ache after you left.