It's been awhile...
I am letting go of grudges I hold. I am asking for forgiveness for some of the things I have done. I am learning how to be the best person I can be. It is hard to change the things that are wrong with you because first you have to notice them. I really have thought about people who mean alot to me lately and people who I really love. Some of them want nothing to do with me and it makes me feel like scum. I slipped up a few times and said or did some things that werent bad but werent wise in respect to my friends. Now it leaves me without certain friends that I still wish I had. I miss alot about this past year and I wish I went through this self improvement before it was too late. Now I sit here writing this journal entry knowing that the only people I see are my co-workers and my boyfriend. I am very happy with the boy I am dating. I am just kind of sad to know that Id ont really have friends, I fucked the ties between us up and I wish that mistakes could be erased but I dont think there is anything I couldd o or say to these girls to let them know how much they really did mean to me while we hungout. I dont hate anyone. I dont dislike anyone. I favor some people but thats natural. I miss the shit out of Shelby. I dont know what is going on in my life right now but I know that I wrote in a composition book about her and I seriously felt like a dude writing about how in love with a girl he was. I cant explain to you how amazing my best friend is. I miss... .