Totally Freaking Funny!
John fished this off of the Craig's List Auto Forum. This is so funny because it is so true!
How to sell a car on CL (warning: long) < cheepyankee > 03/10 13:27:26
In the title, use your interpretation Ebonics to describe the car, without mentioning Year, make, model miles, or price. PHAT RIDE! HYPHY! TIGHT SCRAPER! ROLL WIT BITCHES!
To get a price, take the highest KBB price, add the cost of all the Kmart rash you bolted onto it, every oil change, and repairs, and the price of the rims to the $50 you grandfather gave it to you for. If you financed it, just add principle plus interest plus a grand for your trouble.
In the body, repeatedly state that you are sick of this piece of shit and need it gone now. State “Must sell” repeatedly, and that your price is FIRM cuz you know everyone wants your car.
Note that it “ran when parked”, but don’t say what was so wrong with it that it was never driven again.
State that a car made by the same manufacturer sold at Barrett-Jackson for $300k, so with a little work yours should be worth that, and even though yours is a different year and model.
Keywords sell. Copy every entry from Websters Collegiate and paste it into the bottom of your ad. Also, made up words, like DUBZZ and SRAPPPERZ, force people to buy.
Pictures are frowned on, but if you must take them, only take one. Keep car in the shed, covered with all your trash. Leave something to the buyers imagination! Smear you thumb on the lens, and take the picture at night. If you show a picture of the engine, make sure it’s a pic you took from google of a different model’s engine.
Since you are using the computer in your baby mamas other baby’s room, tell playaz to ring your cell number. Just cuz you have not paid the bill in 6 months does not mean it won’t ring.
When no one calls, repost it every fucking day. Bonus points if you post it on the CL auto forum.
I hope you guys enjoyed this as much as I did. I would just post a link to it but I have no idea how to do that.
How to sell a car on CL (warning: long) < cheepyankee > 03/10 13:27:26
In the title, use your interpretation Ebonics to describe the car, without mentioning Year, make, model miles, or price. PHAT RIDE! HYPHY! TIGHT SCRAPER! ROLL WIT BITCHES!
To get a price, take the highest KBB price, add the cost of all the Kmart rash you bolted onto it, every oil change, and repairs, and the price of the rims to the $50 you grandfather gave it to you for. If you financed it, just add principle plus interest plus a grand for your trouble.
In the body, repeatedly state that you are sick of this piece of shit and need it gone now. State “Must sell” repeatedly, and that your price is FIRM cuz you know everyone wants your car.
Note that it “ran when parked”, but don’t say what was so wrong with it that it was never driven again.
State that a car made by the same manufacturer sold at Barrett-Jackson for $300k, so with a little work yours should be worth that, and even though yours is a different year and model.
Keywords sell. Copy every entry from Websters Collegiate and paste it into the bottom of your ad. Also, made up words, like DUBZZ and SRAPPPERZ, force people to buy.
Pictures are frowned on, but if you must take them, only take one. Keep car in the shed, covered with all your trash. Leave something to the buyers imagination! Smear you thumb on the lens, and take the picture at night. If you show a picture of the engine, make sure it’s a pic you took from google of a different model’s engine.
Since you are using the computer in your baby mamas other baby’s room, tell playaz to ring your cell number. Just cuz you have not paid the bill in 6 months does not mean it won’t ring.
When no one calls, repost it every fucking day. Bonus points if you post it on the CL auto forum.
I hope you guys enjoyed this as much as I did. I would just post a link to it but I have no idea how to do that.