Noo Yoik
After your protagonist (me) left Mississippi and Tennessee, he came back to New York. That city in/of which he has this extreme love/hate relationship. The first few days, it felt oddly intoxicating. And your protagonist felt warm feelings. Then he felt the undercurrents of New York-ness come in right after that, and now...
So the day after next I head back to Chicago for a solid week. I realize now I should probably cut a day or two off the end since they're sorta precious interview/hiring days, but we'll see what happens tomorrow before I do anything drastic. And I think people are more willing to accommodate than I assume.
When I look at the fabric of this summer in terms of weeks and months, I realized how jagged, imbalanced, and broken it is - the summer. Even if I start working as soon as I get back, three weeks after, I'll be heading to Iceland for 10 days. Then I have all of July, this is true, but then August is a self-indulgent mess. I hope I can propel myself around the world and out of this one, this time, again.
I forgot what a snarky bunch of people New Yorkers are. I'm putting on my New York face starting... now.
need to draw and paint
need to draw and paint
need to draw and paint
I'm gonna reward myself with drawing and painting when I find a job. I have been working out nearly EVERY DAY though GO ME. My bod is tightening right up. Gym time = summer body.
I have the new Tori album. Been listening to it constantly, nothing else, for a few days now. It's an incredibly emotional record. That's the best word for it: emotional. Makes me wish I had wine and a vinyl record player - that kind of album. I swear she wrote a couple of those songs exactly for me. My heart is a big, squishy mess. But in a box. The shards are being preserved. I can't really factor that into the summer fabric. Love and sex are gone. This is all about pure intellectualism. And mercenary working. Purely mercenary.
I've become interested in the idea of passive vampirism lately. And I've been thinking about Hawaii's volcano goddess Pele a lot lately - to the point where I'd like to visit the Volcanoes National Park and photograph it, to channel her. For the vampire stuff, I think a trip to Romania (Transylvania) and all that is in order. Vlad the Impaler and all. Maybe I'll name my first son that. Vlad. His brother can be Thud.
Passive vampirism doesn't mean I have to be any less of a vampire. I still get to suck all the blood I want. It's my role that's passive. Instead of actively attacking, I'll just have them cut themselves and bleed into my mouth. Don't wanna hurt the ol' canine teeth. It doesn't mean I have to hunt less. It just gives the victim a more active role in their own capture. I think it's an interesting idea, sort of playing with give/take a bit. It would be a writing project, a prose series. Here's some of what I've come up with for titles:
Easier To Injure (easier to hurt you than heal myself)
Healing Fails
The Passion To Destroy
From the Animals
Siege
Milk
Like Monsters
Substantial Accidental Trauma
Impotence of the Heart
Taste Me Once
Eventide
Day Made Night (does dawn not rise to darkness?)
"Soon before the sun begins to rise, I know that I must give. So that I can live."
Smell ya later,
-H.
So the day after next I head back to Chicago for a solid week. I realize now I should probably cut a day or two off the end since they're sorta precious interview/hiring days, but we'll see what happens tomorrow before I do anything drastic. And I think people are more willing to accommodate than I assume.
When I look at the fabric of this summer in terms of weeks and months, I realized how jagged, imbalanced, and broken it is - the summer. Even if I start working as soon as I get back, three weeks after, I'll be heading to Iceland for 10 days. Then I have all of July, this is true, but then August is a self-indulgent mess. I hope I can propel myself around the world and out of this one, this time, again.
I forgot what a snarky bunch of people New Yorkers are. I'm putting on my New York face starting... now.
need to draw and paint
need to draw and paint
need to draw and paint
I'm gonna reward myself with drawing and painting when I find a job. I have been working out nearly EVERY DAY though GO ME. My bod is tightening right up. Gym time = summer body.
I have the new Tori album. Been listening to it constantly, nothing else, for a few days now. It's an incredibly emotional record. That's the best word for it: emotional. Makes me wish I had wine and a vinyl record player - that kind of album. I swear she wrote a couple of those songs exactly for me. My heart is a big, squishy mess. But in a box. The shards are being preserved. I can't really factor that into the summer fabric. Love and sex are gone. This is all about pure intellectualism. And mercenary working. Purely mercenary.
I've become interested in the idea of passive vampirism lately. And I've been thinking about Hawaii's volcano goddess Pele a lot lately - to the point where I'd like to visit the Volcanoes National Park and photograph it, to channel her. For the vampire stuff, I think a trip to Romania (Transylvania) and all that is in order. Vlad the Impaler and all. Maybe I'll name my first son that. Vlad. His brother can be Thud.
Passive vampirism doesn't mean I have to be any less of a vampire. I still get to suck all the blood I want. It's my role that's passive. Instead of actively attacking, I'll just have them cut themselves and bleed into my mouth. Don't wanna hurt the ol' canine teeth. It doesn't mean I have to hunt less. It just gives the victim a more active role in their own capture. I think it's an interesting idea, sort of playing with give/take a bit. It would be a writing project, a prose series. Here's some of what I've come up with for titles:
Easier To Injure (easier to hurt you than heal myself)
Healing Fails
The Passion To Destroy
From the Animals
Siege
Milk
Like Monsters
Substantial Accidental Trauma
Impotence of the Heart
Taste Me Once
Eventide
Day Made Night (does dawn not rise to darkness?)
"Soon before the sun begins to rise, I know that I must give. So that I can live."
Smell ya later,
-H.