(no subject)
This is for Charley. I know I said I wasn't going to use her name and I'm in no state to think up a fake one. I need her to know how much she means to me. I need her to know right now. I need her to read this and not take those pills. I need her to believe that she is worth the trouble. I love her, and she can't love herself. I can't bear to have her suicide on me. She deserves so much more and I don't want to lose her. Every time she says something on MSN the tears well in my eyes and I just shake my head. If only. If only I could be on the other side of the world with the beautiful little girl that I've gotten to know so well over the last few months. If only there was more I could do right now. If only I had more than words, more than promises of staying online all night just so that I can talk to her all night. She can't do this to herself. I don't want her to. She doesn't deserve it. She can't really want to die. Charley, I love you.
You were always where the sun could never go
I never wanted you to have to be alone
But I couldn't find a way to help you grow
Black Rose