why?
this is something that people who don't really care about my feelings or "mushy" shit shouldn't read it. if you do, don't bitch at me.
i've become REALLY depressed and i HATE it. maybe it all started sunday after i left Carly once again. everytime i leave her i make it seem like it's my last time i see her and it's the drive home and it hurts and sucks a lot. Maybe it's because i don't get to see her at all really anymore. The reason for that would be hockey. it fucks everything up. It makes what could be a whole weekend into 1 night if even that. Maybe it's because when i do see her we're always around other people and we act different around people. Maybe it's because i get really pissed at things. like if she doesn't get something really simple and it happens more than once everyday. it's eating away at me. it's getting to me now. NOT EVEN 2 FUCKING MONTHS INTO SCHOOL and i can't take it anymore. and it's getting to me at school, i don't talk, or sometimes even do my work because she's on my mind comstantly. and i know that she's not the same way which makes me feel like shit or just stupid. i get jelous about everybody around her because they always tell me what they did together that day, even small things, i get jealous because they see her more than me. i get to talk to her less and less everyday it seems. like 10 minutes a day. i hate it. i don't know what to do or how to deal w/ this. i just got off the phone w/ her and i don't even know what to say...
i've become REALLY depressed and i HATE it. maybe it all started sunday after i left Carly once again. everytime i leave her i make it seem like it's my last time i see her and it's the drive home and it hurts and sucks a lot. Maybe it's because i don't get to see her at all really anymore. The reason for that would be hockey. it fucks everything up. It makes what could be a whole weekend into 1 night if even that. Maybe it's because when i do see her we're always around other people and we act different around people. Maybe it's because i get really pissed at things. like if she doesn't get something really simple and it happens more than once everyday. it's eating away at me. it's getting to me now. NOT EVEN 2 FUCKING MONTHS INTO SCHOOL and i can't take it anymore. and it's getting to me at school, i don't talk, or sometimes even do my work because she's on my mind comstantly. and i know that she's not the same way which makes me feel like shit or just stupid. i get jelous about everybody around her because they always tell me what they did together that day, even small things, i get jealous because they see her more than me. i get to talk to her less and less everyday it seems. like 10 minutes a day. i hate it. i don't know what to do or how to deal w/ this. i just got off the phone w/ her and i don't even know what to say...