beaches
i fell apart tonight for no apparent reason.
i felt unwanted and out of place everywhere i went, so i went to the beach and just sat and watched the Gatsby light accross the bay and tried to cry but couldnt because i feel all hollow inside and i dont think i have a heart anymore and thats unfortunate. I just felt so empty. Im functioning, having fun, walking around and smiling, planning my future and am generally happy. but when it comes down to it...i have no emotion left. Ive stopped writing poetry, I only do art assignments, not for me, and I dont think or feel like i used to. its like all of that part of me just shut down.
i hope i get it back someday.
i felt unwanted and out of place everywhere i went, so i went to the beach and just sat and watched the Gatsby light accross the bay and tried to cry but couldnt because i feel all hollow inside and i dont think i have a heart anymore and thats unfortunate. I just felt so empty. Im functioning, having fun, walking around and smiling, planning my future and am generally happy. but when it comes down to it...i have no emotion left. Ive stopped writing poetry, I only do art assignments, not for me, and I dont think or feel like i used to. its like all of that part of me just shut down.
i hope i get it back someday.