(no subject)

[la_missyxbadass]

my heart shattered by a male. for once not a love interest. not a guy friend. but my brother.
i could feel it racing w/ sadness.
for a moment, i wanted to cry.
everything i thought i knew about my family- shattered.
empty.
sad.

I know through all the brotherly sisterly fighting.. i see times where u look up to me.
why not now.
why not when i have something to say.
why can't u hear the word "ashamed".
why don't u care.

about me. mom. dad. all of us.
why are they more important.
why is it more important.

what about respect.
what about the intelligence i know u have.

why.
i haven't felt sadness in such a physical way in so long.
i can feel my stomach tightening.
and my breathing shortening
and tears
coming.