(no subject)
I feel kind of sick. Not the kind of sick you get when you are actually ill, but more the kind when you are just a little disgusted. Well I cannot claim to be happy with myself, and I say this first before I make any wild claims about anyone else. Because really, all I know for sure is my own. I can only guess what goes on about others. So why am I sickened? It is simply from my own weakness.
I thought I was doing so good, reading my bible daily, showing love probably more often than not, and overall I was happy. I was proud of where I was and what I was doing... and therin the problem lies. I became used to it. It became routine. I let it slip away already. I stoped activley thinking about all that I want to and need to be. I let other things fill its place, expecting something to happen on its own. I was looking for a habit I never had. And what I did find, were simply habits I do not want.
It's not to late. It can never be too late, but I'm taking this as a warning to myself. I don't ever want to be safe and complacent. And that is really hard to honestly want. But I will accept it. I have to if I want to grow.
In other news, I think I ought to let you know I am feeling rather depressed today. (to quote my favorite depressed android)
I thought I was doing so good, reading my bible daily, showing love probably more often than not, and overall I was happy. I was proud of where I was and what I was doing... and therin the problem lies. I became used to it. It became routine. I let it slip away already. I stoped activley thinking about all that I want to and need to be. I let other things fill its place, expecting something to happen on its own. I was looking for a habit I never had. And what I did find, were simply habits I do not want.
It's not to late. It can never be too late, but I'm taking this as a warning to myself. I don't ever want to be safe and complacent. And that is really hard to honestly want. But I will accept it. I have to if I want to grow.
In other news, I think I ought to let you know I am feeling rather depressed today. (to quote my favorite depressed android)