Somethings just dont last forever.
Christmas was great i got a lot of good things. And i even got stuff i didnt expect and it was also nice to spend time with my family. I wish christmas last longer and seems to go by so quickly. A lot of people say it doesnt feel like christmas when it is and then once it does its over. But theres not much to do about that. Well i had a very interesting day before christmas eve. It was my ex's birthday and so i figured i would be nice and so i text him happy birthday and good luck getting your drivers license, than he text me back saying sure and than he text me his mom let him down again and i asked what he meant and he said his mom didnt take him to get it and he was sad, so i text him aww that sucks and i guess that your not going to have a happy birthday after all. Than he said to me would you have said that if we were still going out and i said yes and i still care about you and he said what do you mean and i told him i still cared about him, that im not over him yet. And he asked me again what i meant and i said i still liked him, and he told me he still liked me and i couldnt tell anyone, and he asked me what i wanted to do and i told him i dont know and i didnt want to get hurt again and he said to me i was the one who broke up with him when we said we would work on things and i told him i did it cuz he had already hurt me and ignored me that whole day and i didnt want to go through that the whole week and than he asked once more what i wanted to do and i told him we just would talk and see what happens. So we talked again that day and than i told my friend katie what happened and she said i shouldnt go back out with him cuz im going to wind up getting hurt again and i promised her i wouldnt. And i do know its my decision but why cant i find a good guy. its so hard because i still like him but i feel happy with out him even though i miss him and if he truly wants me back he has to prove to me he wont hurt me again, he has to work for me cuz im sick of being the one doing all the work. I hope one day i get lucky and get that one guy who wont treat me bad, i really think i deserve to get treated good but i just have to wait and see.