Reflections
People keep on asking me how mathcamp was this year compared to last year, and my response is always, "different." "Well, is that better or worse?" they respond eagerly. But there's no real answer to that question. You want me to quantify each of my experiences to come up with some total sum of everything I've done, and then see which is greater? Well there is no answer to that. No answer. (Although, if there were to be an answer, it would be 42. Or maybe 243. Speaking of which, I still haven't seen that proof yet. Oops.) There were many things missing from this year. Most of my friends from last year didn't come back. There was hardly any bunny-bunny-toki-toki and no massive Sundays. No dining hall named Dana and no soccer players to watch crazy cubing campers. But just as there was loss, there was also much gain. I made a ton of new friends: some from last year that I hardly spoke to for whatever reason and some amazing new campers. There were new staff members, new games (alas, mafia monkey in the middle was only played once), and new inside jokes. So just as it's an uncomfortable question to ask whether I prefer RED or this year's trio (which ironically, did not get abbreved), it's an impossible question to answer which year I preferred.
Mathcamp had a totally different atmosphere this year. If I could use one word to describe mathcamp last year, it would be fun. We played games, ate food, jumped on mattresses, danced, and did anything and everything. We spent all camp enjoying ourselves and loving life.
This year, I would choose a different word. This year I would say mathcamp is love. You could tell there was love all around just by the sheer number of couples at camp this year. But there is another kind of love, the love between friends, the love between everybody, the rare kind of love that brings big groups together and makes small groups one. Some say that camp was cliquier this year. I say, yes, that may be true, but it allowed wondrous things to happen. It created groups of friends that rarely slept not because they were doing something fun and lost track of time, but because they didn't want to spend a moment apart. It gave way to other people that slept in the same room every night for the same reasons. It created music and poetry and bloomed even more love and nothing could stop that, not the petty conflicts left over from last year and not any of the new drama that might have left friendships broken and everything changed. No, we looked past that and learned to love.
The last day of camp proved this. People were sprawled out on the couch, not asleep or exhausted from doing too much math, but in each other's arms, trying to soak up the last remaining moments with the company of friends. There were hugs for everyone and pictures and memory making. Yes, there were activities and the usual, but there was a different air to them all, because nobody wanted to give up some time with the people they loved. Because what most of us have realized over the past year is that math is just math, but friendship and love are different. They are a constant presence that connect people that are not near, and make people feel what it really means to miss someone, and cause some people to write amazing poetry and others to write down all their feelings in a huge heap of meaning and nonmeaning and others to write beautiful music and everything ends up different but it's the same purpose and that is the love that connects us all, and that was what mathcamp was this year. Mathcamp is love.
So to everyone that said last year was more fun, I have to say I agree. But do I prefer that to this year? No, probably not.
Thanks to all my friends at mathcamp for the amazing times we've shared and for inspiring me to write down my feelings and observations. I may not have a way with words like Adrian or Nikolay, but I too share the feeling of needing to share my feelings. I love you all!
Dana
(ho man)
P.S. Hi to all my new LJ friends from MC08! Feel free to comment and talk to me even if you didn't think we were friends. One of my best friends at camp this year was someone I didn't start speaking to until a few months after camp ended. It can happen.
Mathcamp had a totally different atmosphere this year. If I could use one word to describe mathcamp last year, it would be fun. We played games, ate food, jumped on mattresses, danced, and did anything and everything. We spent all camp enjoying ourselves and loving life.
This year, I would choose a different word. This year I would say mathcamp is love. You could tell there was love all around just by the sheer number of couples at camp this year. But there is another kind of love, the love between friends, the love between everybody, the rare kind of love that brings big groups together and makes small groups one. Some say that camp was cliquier this year. I say, yes, that may be true, but it allowed wondrous things to happen. It created groups of friends that rarely slept not because they were doing something fun and lost track of time, but because they didn't want to spend a moment apart. It gave way to other people that slept in the same room every night for the same reasons. It created music and poetry and bloomed even more love and nothing could stop that, not the petty conflicts left over from last year and not any of the new drama that might have left friendships broken and everything changed. No, we looked past that and learned to love.
The last day of camp proved this. People were sprawled out on the couch, not asleep or exhausted from doing too much math, but in each other's arms, trying to soak up the last remaining moments with the company of friends. There were hugs for everyone and pictures and memory making. Yes, there were activities and the usual, but there was a different air to them all, because nobody wanted to give up some time with the people they loved. Because what most of us have realized over the past year is that math is just math, but friendship and love are different. They are a constant presence that connect people that are not near, and make people feel what it really means to miss someone, and cause some people to write amazing poetry and others to write down all their feelings in a huge heap of meaning and nonmeaning and others to write beautiful music and everything ends up different but it's the same purpose and that is the love that connects us all, and that was what mathcamp was this year. Mathcamp is love.
So to everyone that said last year was more fun, I have to say I agree. But do I prefer that to this year? No, probably not.
Thanks to all my friends at mathcamp for the amazing times we've shared and for inspiring me to write down my feelings and observations. I may not have a way with words like Adrian or Nikolay, but I too share the feeling of needing to share my feelings. I love you all!
Dana
(ho man)
P.S. Hi to all my new LJ friends from MC08! Feel free to comment and talk to me even if you didn't think we were friends. One of my best friends at camp this year was someone I didn't start speaking to until a few months after camp ended. It can happen.