9 straight hours of Narnia
Dear God, MORE challenge art?!
I still have to write a short story for Astronomy personifying the earth and its descent into puberty, but that's just silly, so I'll talk about Narnia instead. More specifically, the BBC movies that everyone saw as a kid but that I missed out on. mellorine and I had a fantastic Narnia Party (with pizza! and ice cream! how quaint!) and the movies ranged from cheesy, to horrifying, to actually engrossing.
The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe: For a girl brought up on war rations and the like, Lucy sure has been hitting the chocolate cake. My God, she is revolting. Her teeth may be an orthodontist’s dream, but they are movie watchers NIGHTMARE. Ugh. All of the children are bland, but Peter shows some promise :D :D *pedophile*. Oh look, Tumnus! The hair on his upper body could make a carpet and a few nice fur coats, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the coats in the wardrobe are just that: Faun Skin. Oh yes, I went there XD. The Witch appears. This woman is hilarious, as her idea of acting is gasping and shouting really, really loudly. I <3 her math skills: "Oh? 1, 2, 3, 4..*checks fingers* 4.. OMG WTF MONGOLIAN BBQ FOUR HUMANS?!"
The special effects...are not special. Or particularly effective. They are, in fact, CARTOON ANIMALS. Although Robot!Aslan is surprisingly good, I like him better than Neeson!Alsan even if he does sound moderately stoned. Now Peter lounges in a tent with many virgin women Dryads. I'll be a poofy-haired tree spirit for you, Peter! *leer*
Oh, and then? Jadis dies because she falls of a cliff. Because Aslan’s roar makes it shake until it dumps her. Wtf, anticlimactic.
Prince Caspian: Hello, 7 year old hippie king, and---hey look, an epic battle! *Stuff happens*. Peter initially wears a revolting red baseball cap to hide, well, who knows what?
And then he takes it off.
OH HELLO HOTNESS. That Narnian air does MAGIC things to little boys...
Caspian is wounded. Peter rushes to him, concerned. Kyoko: "TEND TO HIM, PETER!!" *fans self* I'm slashing good little Christian children, feel free to stop me at any time.
Voyage of the Dawn Treader: My favorite book ever, please to be treating it nicely..
Eustace's casting is spot on, although this is over shadowed by my despair at the fact that once Peter got hot he was banned from Narnia. Luckily, Edmund is now rather strapping :D.
Minus the white boy afro, Caspian is pretty too. Oh dear.
The Silver Chair was brilliant, so I can't really mock it. Puddleglum was GREAT, perfectly gloomy and a little kooky and so funny <3
Snape
Bella
Lily/James
Ron and Lavender
Snape
*_* Shitty day. Grey's Anatomy may yet cheer me up, though!
I still have to write a short story for Astronomy personifying the earth and its descent into puberty, but that's just silly, so I'll talk about Narnia instead. More specifically, the BBC movies that everyone saw as a kid but that I missed out on. mellorine and I had a fantastic Narnia Party (with pizza! and ice cream! how quaint!) and the movies ranged from cheesy, to horrifying, to actually engrossing.
The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe: For a girl brought up on war rations and the like, Lucy sure has been hitting the chocolate cake. My God, she is revolting. Her teeth may be an orthodontist’s dream, but they are movie watchers NIGHTMARE. Ugh. All of the children are bland, but Peter shows some promise :D :D *pedophile*. Oh look, Tumnus! The hair on his upper body could make a carpet and a few nice fur coats, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the coats in the wardrobe are just that: Faun Skin. Oh yes, I went there XD. The Witch appears. This woman is hilarious, as her idea of acting is gasping and shouting really, really loudly. I <3 her math skills: "Oh? 1, 2, 3, 4..*checks fingers* 4.. OMG WTF MONGOLIAN BBQ FOUR HUMANS?!"
The special effects...are not special. Or particularly effective. They are, in fact, CARTOON ANIMALS. Although Robot!Aslan is surprisingly good, I like him better than Neeson!Alsan even if he does sound moderately stoned. Now Peter lounges in a tent with many virgin women Dryads. I'll be a poofy-haired tree spirit for you, Peter! *leer*
Oh, and then? Jadis dies because she falls of a cliff. Because Aslan’s roar makes it shake until it dumps her. Wtf, anticlimactic.
Prince Caspian: Hello, 7 year old hippie king, and---hey look, an epic battle! *Stuff happens*. Peter initially wears a revolting red baseball cap to hide, well, who knows what?
And then he takes it off.
OH HELLO HOTNESS. That Narnian air does MAGIC things to little boys...
Caspian is wounded. Peter rushes to him, concerned. Kyoko: "TEND TO HIM, PETER!!" *fans self* I'm slashing good little Christian children, feel free to stop me at any time.
Voyage of the Dawn Treader: My favorite book ever, please to be treating it nicely..
Eustace's casting is spot on, although this is over shadowed by my despair at the fact that once Peter got hot he was banned from Narnia. Luckily, Edmund is now rather strapping :D.
Minus the white boy afro, Caspian is pretty too. Oh dear.
The Silver Chair was brilliant, so I can't really mock it. Puddleglum was GREAT, perfectly gloomy and a little kooky and so funny <3
Snape
Bella
Lily/James
Ron and Lavender
Snape
*_* Shitty day. Grey's Anatomy may yet cheer me up, though!