HEART'S SPLINTER
Title: Heart's Splinter (short fic)
Characters/Pairings: Donghae, Eunhyuk (EunHae)
Genre: angst, romance
Ratings:
1,511 words
Summary: What is there to do when love falters?
a/n this is my first ever eunhae fic, so sorry if it disappoints :)) also, this is based on a teaser fic made awesomely by my baby princessyuyu1 watch her video~
They were perfect.
Everyone around them knew how well they suited each other; they had a lot of things in common, they liked the same things and enjoyed doing things together. They complemented each other; what one lacked, the other compensated. People knew how well they mesh.
Donghae isn't generally good with words, and he is too innocent for his own good. He is simple-minded, yet his heart is pure. He is honest and doesn't have any pretentions. Looking in his eyes is like reading his most secretive thoughts. Maybe that's why people naturally like him; he seems genuine, and you don't need to second guess what his intention is. That's what Hyukjae loved about him.
Hyukjae is outgoing, eloquent. He's ambitious, he knows what he wants and he doesn't stop until he gets it. It's really admirable how Hyukjae succeeded in achieving everything he has now. He's assertive and a go-getter, qualities that earned him admiration from others. Maybe that's why people naturally respect him; he is determined and passionate in everything he does. That's what Donghae loved about him.
Love came to them so easily.
Their brand of love is effortless. They felt it, they didn't fight it, they marvelled in the wonder that is love. They basked in each other's feelings, and they were happy. They made love seem easy, like a gentle stream of water flowing in the river.
They were perfect. They thought that nothing would come between them, that they would love each other forever.
But everything changes, even love. Or if not love, then trust, or even commitment.
Or maybe love really doesn't change, but it falters. Yes, in moments of weakness and temptation, love falters.
One mistake was all it took for their love to crumble apart.
The room was quiet, the two of them not really knowing how to break the silence. Donghae was sitting on his bed, while Hyukjae beside him, yet the gap between them seemed to be immense. Both their eyes were downcast, the one shielding the hurt he was feeling, the other one hiding the guilt that was gnawing him.
"I guess I'm not the right one, huh?" Donghae heard himself say after so many minutes of silence. He hated how pathetic his voice sounded, but he didn't have any choice, he didn't know how to put into words what he was feeling without sounding pained.
"Don't say that, Hae," Hyukjae murmured without looking up. His voice was equally shaky, as if he was scared of what they were talking about.
Donghae smiled bitterly. "But isn't it true? After everything we've been through, isn't it funny how we won't end up together? Damn funny," he chuckled spitefully. He didn't know how to decode his feelings, he was so hurt, to know that the one he loved the most loved someone else was tearing him apart, he wanted to laugh at how ridiculously hurt he was.
"Don't say that," Hyukjae said once more, raking his fingers through his hair in frustration.
"What should I say then?" Donghae snapped, feeling his patience growing thin. He was a bunch of emotions, and he didn't know which vile feeling would come out. "You're not telling me anything, you're not even explaining what happened. I only hear your sorrys, but what will I do with that Hyukjae?"
"I... I don't know what to say," Hyukjae turned his head upward, looking at Donghae with eyes filled with remorse. "I don't know what else to say but sorry."
Right now, the word sorry irritates Donghae the most. "There was a time when sorry was enough, Hyukjae."
Silence followed. Donghae didn’t know what he wanted. He never recalled a time when Hyukjae apologized and he wasn't willing to accept him. There was always space in his heart to forgive, because love always compelled him. But right now, not even love can push him, he was too hurt and bitter to allow any apology.
Yet, if he didn’t want apologies, what did he want? He asked himself this question, but he couldn’t answer it, making him more aggravated. “Tell me,” Donghae started. He didn’t want to ask this, he was afraid of the answer, yet he knew, he would never understand if he stayed scared. So he continued, in spite of the lump in his throat, and the wild beating of his heart. “Do you love her?”
He turned to look at Hyukjae, and their eyes met. The other’s eyes told him Hyukjae was suffering too, and he saw the other shake his head faintly. But something told Donghae it wasn’t an answer to his question, it was as if to tell him to not ask this question. Don’t make me answer you, Hyukjae’s eyes seemed to be telling him, making his heart ache.
“Do you love her?” he repeated, his voice croaking slightly. He hated this, he hated how weak he was, he hated how wounded he seemed.
Hyukjae reached for his hand. Donghae tried snatching his hand back, but the other held him fast, gripping his hand tight as if not wanting to let it go.
“I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m feeling for her. All I know is that I love you.”
He held his head down, and let tears fall from his eyes. Donghae’s chest felt like bursting, eyes too hot from tears that he couldn’t open them. He could still feel Hyukjae’s hand gripping his so tight while he cried. He didn’t know why he was hurt, Hyukjae loved him, Hyukjae loves him still, but it didn’t sound as absolute and perfect as it was before.
“Donghae, I love you. I love you,” the other was saying, his voice breaking as he started to cry too. There was a time when the words I love you meant something so precious, but Donghae didn’t believe them anymore, knowing that Hyukjae’s words didn’t mean the way the other usually meant it.
“ I know deep in your heart that you do,” Donghae said; he couldn’t take this anymore, he couldn’t take knowing they were both suffering and there’s nothing that they could do. The damage had been done. “I know you won’t intentionally hurt me, I know that. You’re a good man, Hyukjae,” tears started falling from his eyes once again, and he felt like a wuss crying over something so overly pathetic as this, and still, he couldn’t stop. “But right now, you’re breaking me.”
Nothing could be heard but their silent whimpers. Hyukjae held his hand towards his lips, kissing it as if in prayer, his tears staining the back of Donghae’s hand. The other kept on kissing his hand, his palm desperately, making Donghae’s heart melt. He wished that everything would be over with a snap of a finger, but he knew it wasn’t that easy. Is there still hope for them?
“I love you, I love you, I’m sorry,” Hyukjae chanted almost deliriously, and Donghae could hear remorse and repentance in the other’s voice. Hyukjae leaned forward and dropped his head at the crook of Donghae’s shoulder, seeking comfort and forgiveness. Donghae didn’t move, even as he felt Hyukjae’s arms wrapping around him. Hyukjae’s words were muffled, but he still could make up the other’s words. “I know my words might sound empty and weak, but I love you, Hae. With all my fucking heart that it hurts so bad. I’m so scared my mistake would break us apart.”
Donghae’s heart still hurt. Even now, his mind was still nagged by the thought that there was a part of Hyukjae that was capable of hurting him this way, this deep. There was still doubt inside him, but still…
“I know all I can say right now is sorry, and I know it’s not enough, but even if that’s all I can offer, please don’t shut me out, Hae,” Hyukjae pleaded, burrowing his head on Donghae’s shoulder, pushing him down the bed.
He let himself be laid down, feeling tired and exhausted and not knowing how to fight. No matter how miserable he was feeling, there was only one person who could ease his pain. Even if that person was the one who caused it.
Hyukjae hugged him as if he was the most precious thing on earth, and reluctantly, he let himself melt against the other’s hold, hugging Hyukjae’s head still buried at the side of his face. “It’s fine now. Let’s… let’s talk about this in the morning.”
Hyukjae pulled his head up to look at Donghae’s face, seeking answers to his confusion. Were they finished? Would this be the end of the line for them?
Donghae pulled Hyukjae’s face towards his, their lips meeting gently. He wanted to let the other understand, even without words, that even though there was pain between them, and though love wasn’t that absolute and perfect anymore, and even if trust wouldn’t be easily given this time around, there was still something that was worth holding onto, worth fighting for.
Love, amidst all the imperfections, can still exist between two people.
Characters/Pairings: Donghae, Eunhyuk (EunHae)
Genre: angst, romance
Ratings:
1,511 words
Summary: What is there to do when love falters?
a/n this is my first ever eunhae fic, so sorry if it disappoints :)) also, this is based on a teaser fic made awesomely by my baby princessyuyu1 watch her video~
Click to viewThey were perfect.
Everyone around them knew how well they suited each other; they had a lot of things in common, they liked the same things and enjoyed doing things together. They complemented each other; what one lacked, the other compensated. People knew how well they mesh.
Donghae isn't generally good with words, and he is too innocent for his own good. He is simple-minded, yet his heart is pure. He is honest and doesn't have any pretentions. Looking in his eyes is like reading his most secretive thoughts. Maybe that's why people naturally like him; he seems genuine, and you don't need to second guess what his intention is. That's what Hyukjae loved about him.
Hyukjae is outgoing, eloquent. He's ambitious, he knows what he wants and he doesn't stop until he gets it. It's really admirable how Hyukjae succeeded in achieving everything he has now. He's assertive and a go-getter, qualities that earned him admiration from others. Maybe that's why people naturally respect him; he is determined and passionate in everything he does. That's what Donghae loved about him.
Love came to them so easily.
Their brand of love is effortless. They felt it, they didn't fight it, they marvelled in the wonder that is love. They basked in each other's feelings, and they were happy. They made love seem easy, like a gentle stream of water flowing in the river.
They were perfect. They thought that nothing would come between them, that they would love each other forever.
But everything changes, even love. Or if not love, then trust, or even commitment.
Or maybe love really doesn't change, but it falters. Yes, in moments of weakness and temptation, love falters.
One mistake was all it took for their love to crumble apart.
The room was quiet, the two of them not really knowing how to break the silence. Donghae was sitting on his bed, while Hyukjae beside him, yet the gap between them seemed to be immense. Both their eyes were downcast, the one shielding the hurt he was feeling, the other one hiding the guilt that was gnawing him.
"I guess I'm not the right one, huh?" Donghae heard himself say after so many minutes of silence. He hated how pathetic his voice sounded, but he didn't have any choice, he didn't know how to put into words what he was feeling without sounding pained.
"Don't say that, Hae," Hyukjae murmured without looking up. His voice was equally shaky, as if he was scared of what they were talking about.
Donghae smiled bitterly. "But isn't it true? After everything we've been through, isn't it funny how we won't end up together? Damn funny," he chuckled spitefully. He didn't know how to decode his feelings, he was so hurt, to know that the one he loved the most loved someone else was tearing him apart, he wanted to laugh at how ridiculously hurt he was.
"Don't say that," Hyukjae said once more, raking his fingers through his hair in frustration.
"What should I say then?" Donghae snapped, feeling his patience growing thin. He was a bunch of emotions, and he didn't know which vile feeling would come out. "You're not telling me anything, you're not even explaining what happened. I only hear your sorrys, but what will I do with that Hyukjae?"
"I... I don't know what to say," Hyukjae turned his head upward, looking at Donghae with eyes filled with remorse. "I don't know what else to say but sorry."
Right now, the word sorry irritates Donghae the most. "There was a time when sorry was enough, Hyukjae."
Silence followed. Donghae didn’t know what he wanted. He never recalled a time when Hyukjae apologized and he wasn't willing to accept him. There was always space in his heart to forgive, because love always compelled him. But right now, not even love can push him, he was too hurt and bitter to allow any apology.
Yet, if he didn’t want apologies, what did he want? He asked himself this question, but he couldn’t answer it, making him more aggravated. “Tell me,” Donghae started. He didn’t want to ask this, he was afraid of the answer, yet he knew, he would never understand if he stayed scared. So he continued, in spite of the lump in his throat, and the wild beating of his heart. “Do you love her?”
He turned to look at Hyukjae, and their eyes met. The other’s eyes told him Hyukjae was suffering too, and he saw the other shake his head faintly. But something told Donghae it wasn’t an answer to his question, it was as if to tell him to not ask this question. Don’t make me answer you, Hyukjae’s eyes seemed to be telling him, making his heart ache.
“Do you love her?” he repeated, his voice croaking slightly. He hated this, he hated how weak he was, he hated how wounded he seemed.
Hyukjae reached for his hand. Donghae tried snatching his hand back, but the other held him fast, gripping his hand tight as if not wanting to let it go.
“I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m feeling for her. All I know is that I love you.”
He held his head down, and let tears fall from his eyes. Donghae’s chest felt like bursting, eyes too hot from tears that he couldn’t open them. He could still feel Hyukjae’s hand gripping his so tight while he cried. He didn’t know why he was hurt, Hyukjae loved him, Hyukjae loves him still, but it didn’t sound as absolute and perfect as it was before.
“Donghae, I love you. I love you,” the other was saying, his voice breaking as he started to cry too. There was a time when the words I love you meant something so precious, but Donghae didn’t believe them anymore, knowing that Hyukjae’s words didn’t mean the way the other usually meant it.
“ I know deep in your heart that you do,” Donghae said; he couldn’t take this anymore, he couldn’t take knowing they were both suffering and there’s nothing that they could do. The damage had been done. “I know you won’t intentionally hurt me, I know that. You’re a good man, Hyukjae,” tears started falling from his eyes once again, and he felt like a wuss crying over something so overly pathetic as this, and still, he couldn’t stop. “But right now, you’re breaking me.”
Nothing could be heard but their silent whimpers. Hyukjae held his hand towards his lips, kissing it as if in prayer, his tears staining the back of Donghae’s hand. The other kept on kissing his hand, his palm desperately, making Donghae’s heart melt. He wished that everything would be over with a snap of a finger, but he knew it wasn’t that easy. Is there still hope for them?
“I love you, I love you, I’m sorry,” Hyukjae chanted almost deliriously, and Donghae could hear remorse and repentance in the other’s voice. Hyukjae leaned forward and dropped his head at the crook of Donghae’s shoulder, seeking comfort and forgiveness. Donghae didn’t move, even as he felt Hyukjae’s arms wrapping around him. Hyukjae’s words were muffled, but he still could make up the other’s words. “I know my words might sound empty and weak, but I love you, Hae. With all my fucking heart that it hurts so bad. I’m so scared my mistake would break us apart.”
Donghae’s heart still hurt. Even now, his mind was still nagged by the thought that there was a part of Hyukjae that was capable of hurting him this way, this deep. There was still doubt inside him, but still…
“I know all I can say right now is sorry, and I know it’s not enough, but even if that’s all I can offer, please don’t shut me out, Hae,” Hyukjae pleaded, burrowing his head on Donghae’s shoulder, pushing him down the bed.
He let himself be laid down, feeling tired and exhausted and not knowing how to fight. No matter how miserable he was feeling, there was only one person who could ease his pain. Even if that person was the one who caused it.
Hyukjae hugged him as if he was the most precious thing on earth, and reluctantly, he let himself melt against the other’s hold, hugging Hyukjae’s head still buried at the side of his face. “It’s fine now. Let’s… let’s talk about this in the morning.”
Hyukjae pulled his head up to look at Donghae’s face, seeking answers to his confusion. Were they finished? Would this be the end of the line for them?
Donghae pulled Hyukjae’s face towards his, their lips meeting gently. He wanted to let the other understand, even without words, that even though there was pain between them, and though love wasn’t that absolute and perfect anymore, and even if trust wouldn’t be easily given this time around, there was still something that was worth holding onto, worth fighting for.
Love, amidst all the imperfections, can still exist between two people.