Hiding It
hiding it (sooyoung).
romance.
pg.
This is the Sooyoung chapter of a longer series I have, but I think it can stand on its own, too. The footnotes/links at the bottom are to videos and pictures and articles, because I try to base the chapters on reality. (But if anyone still has questions, please feel free to comment xD) Anyway, here it is~
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5.
The night that Super Junior M’s ‘Supergirl’ music video1 is released, the nine girls of SNSD crowd around the computer in their dorm holding pillows and stuffed animals and toothbrushes. There’s a buzz in the room, because everyone is waiting to see Jessica’s cameo in the video.
As Taeyeon types in the website, all the members are talking at once:
“Okay, you guys, nobody’s allowed to laugh at me-”
“Hyoyeon-unnie can just translate it for us, she knows Mandarin-”
“Sica-ya, I’m so jealous, Henry-shii and Zhoumi-shii are soooo cute-”
“Yuri-ah, how come you’re standing in front when I’m the shortest?”
“Omo, I’m so excited-”
Sooyoung raises her box of noodles closer to her face so that the food has less distance to travel. As the tallest, she’s standing behind all the other members. (Take those long legs to the back, Sooyoung-ah, Hyoyeon had said, sticking her tongue out jokingly.)
Sooyoung shoves a bunch of noodles into her mouth to distract herself while the video is loading, because she has been waiting for this MV release for weeks now. Super Junior M is her favorite subgroup of the band, and she saw the Supergirl teaser when it came out, and she really wants to see how all the members are styled with this newest comeback. She’s especially curious to see how Kyuhyun-oppa will look.
Not that she likes him or anything. Because she doesn’t. It’s just pure curiosity.
Sooyoung stuffs some more food into her mouth to seal that thought.
Finally, the video loads completely. Everyone is squealing and jumping around in anticipation, and Taeyeon goes into umma-mode and makes sure everyone is quiet before she clicks 'play'. All nine members are completely silent for the duration of the music video.
When it finally ends, there is a pause for two seconds before noise erupts through the dorm. Jessica is immediately engulfed in a nine-person hug, and the girls can't stop gushing about what they've just seen.
Sooyoung is in love. She is in love with the Chinese language, with the song, with the lyrics (after Hyoyeon translates), with Henry-shii's popping and Ryeowook-oppa’s smile, with Sica's role and Sica's dancing and gosh the members are so talented and she loves them so much. Sooyoung is also in love with Kyuhyun-oppa.
The thought hits her like a truck and literally stops her mid-stride to the kitchen.
She’s glad she finished the noodles earlier, because she drops the empty box to the floor with the shock of the realization.
In love. With Cho-freaking-Kyuhyun. Like actually in love with him. Like exactly what Sooyoung has been trying to convince herself for months that she is not.
The thought comes directly and kind of easily, as though she hasn’t built up any resistance at all, as though it’s the first time she’s ever had the idea. She’s been telling herself for ages that he’s just another guy, that she’s not allowed to, that baby crushes go away all the time.
The wall that she’s built up comes crumbling down without warning, and Sooyoung has to sit down at the kitchen table as the weight of how much she cares about Kyuhyun hits her. She doesn’t know why exactly this music video made her realize, but it did. It’s not the fact that he was wearing a suit, or that his haircut looks good on him, or the way she feels like his stupid dark eyes look into her soul while he’s singing. It’s everything. It’s him.
Sooyoung leans back in her chair and realizes that she’s lost the battle.
And while Sooyoung is terrified of what will happen if anyone were to find out, it’s also kind of a relief to just admit it.
Time to stop lying to yourself, Choi Sooyoung.
She stays up late into the night the day the Korean version of Supergirl1 comes out, purchasing the song, downloading the software, writing down the times of the segment she wants, cutting it out of the song, downloading more software, converting it into a ringtone file, sending it to her cell phone, and selecting it as her ringer. It is a lot of work and luckily Jessica sleeps through anything, but finally Sooyoung crawls into bed and lies quietly as the screen lights up her face, before carefully turning down the volume and selecting 'play ringtone'. Kyuhyun's low, smooth voice comes through the speakers, saying, "Woah-ohh, you're my, you're my baby girl..." She knows enough English from Fany and Sica to know what it means. She falls asleep that night playing it over and over to herself and imagining girlishly that he's saying it to her.
So maybe she's kind of obsessed with him. Big deal.
----
Sooyoung pushes the door to her room open with her shoulder, her arms full of the perfectly folded laundry that Hyoyeon has just given her, and sees Sunny lying on her stomach, staring at a laptop. Sooyoung throws the clothes carelessly onto her bed and flops down next to Sunny. “Whatcha doing?” she asks, peering at the screen.
“Watching old Chunji videos,” Sunny mumbles, as a clip of her and Sungmin wildly lip-synching a random song and eating strawberries comes to an end2. She opens a folder full of video files and clicks one at random.
A video entitled ‘Sungmin Dance Time’ pops up on the screen3. It takes Sooyoung a second to understand what’s going on, but eventually she realizes that Sungmin has a certain amount of time to dance to whatever music happens to play during the duration of the game. He looks embarrassed in the video. Sunny looks thrilled.
The music starts off as a heavy techno beat, then switches to SNSD, then Super Junior’s ‘U’, on and on. At one point, Sungmin grabs Sunny’s hand and pulls her up to dance-she protests, but he gets a tight grip on both of her wrists and forces her into a silly little dance, and she can’t help but laugh as he twirls her around like a marionette.
In real life, Sooyoung turns to the side to comment on how cute it is-and stops dead at the look on Sunny’s face. Something in her expression is a little sad, a little nostalgic, and it makes a strange thought occur to Sooyoung. And all of a sudden Sooyoung has this irrational desire to ask Sunny if she-if Sungmin-if Sunny likes-
But something stops her from asking. Because Sunny is older, Sunny knows the rules, Sunny had to fight like crazy to gain acceptance in SM. Sunny knows-more than anyone-how much words can hurt. Sunny wouldn’t throw it all away for a guy.
The video ends while Sooyoung is lost in her thoughts. Sunny sighs and then shakes her head, smiling brightly. Clicking out of the video, she sits up and stretches, saying, “I’m going to go see if Yoona wants to play video games…do you want to come?”
Sooyoung is about to say yes, but then she remembers something. Something that involves Chunji and Kyuhyun-oppa, something that she’d forgotten about until just now. So instead, she says, “Um, no thanks…Sunny-ah, do you mind if I look through some of these?”
“Of course not, Sooyoungie! If you change your mind about playing with us, just come into the family room.” Sunny smiles and bounds out of the room.
The second Sunny is out of sight, Sooyoung turns and throws herself at the laptop. She searches frantically until she finds the video that she wants, clicking on it so hard that she nearly breaks the keyboard. A video player opens after a few seconds of loading, and Sooyoung sees herself sitting next to Sungmin, rather than Sunny. Judging by the party hats on their heads, this must be some kind of radio anniversary-100 days, if she remembers correctly4. It feels like a long time ago.
In the video, Sungmin says, “Now we’ll have a special surprise caller…” and after a moment, Kyuhyun’s voice comes through on the speakers. He begins to make fun of her immediately, and Sooyoung rolls her eyes and skips forward in the video.
Video-Sungmin is the middle of saying, “Kyuhyun-sshi, I love you,” and Sooyoung holds her breath because the part she’s waiting for is coming up.
“Sooyoung-sshi…Sooyoung-shii?” Kyuhyun says, trying to speak over Sungmin.
“Yes?” Video-Sooyoung responds.
“I love you.”
Video-Sooyoung squeals and responds, “I love you, too!” before breaking out into random English. “I love you, you love me, we love each other!”
Video-Kyuhyun laughs and says, “…I’m fine thank you, and you?”
Back in real life, Sooyoung pauses the video and spazzes to herself. She’s about to press the replay button to watch it over and over again, but then she hears Tiffany shout, “SOOYOUNG-AH, PLEASE COME IN HERE AND PLAY WITH US, WE NEED YOUUUU!”
The rest of the girls join the chorus, pleading with Sooyoung to come play, so she quits the video and bounds out of the room.
Her smile, however, doesn’t leave her face for the rest of the day.
----
Sooyoung will never admit it to anyone, but she cries for an hour after they chop off her hair for Genie. She refuses to leave the dorm for three days, moping around and watching sappy dramas in her bedroom. Eventually, however, Taeyeon barges in and tells her that the comeback is in three days, and she doesn’t care if Sooyoung has to practice with a bag over her head as long as she’s got the dance down perfectly.
Sooyoung pouts heavily, but knows that Taeyeon is right. An embarrassing haircut would be nothing compared to messing up the Genie dance in front of the entire world during their comeback stage. So she changes her clothes, rummages around in her closet for the ridiculous pom-pom hat she bought in Japan5, and shoves all her hair up inside of it. Then she takes a deep breath and makes her way to the front door.
Fifteen minutes later, she’s standing alone, dancing her heart out in the practice room. She knows she must look totally ridiculous in a big t-shirt she borrowed from Tiffany and short white shorts and high heels and the stupid hat on her head, but she stands up proudly and practices the leg-kicking dance. Everything is going okay, but Sooyoung freezes with her leg in the air when Cho Kyuhyun slams open the door and leans into the room.
He is looking down at his phone as he simultaneously texts someone and speaks to Sooyoung. “Hey, Sooyoung-ah. Your comeback is in a few days, right? Give me a sneak preview of the dance.”
Trying to maintain composure, Sooyoung shakes herself out of her shock and runs over to the CD player, shutting it off right in the middle of, “I’m a genie for your dream!” She steadies her voice and says, “No way, Kyuhyun-oppa, you have to wait just like everyone else. Besides, I think you’re forgetting the fact that you wouldn’t even let us listen to ‘Sorry, Sorry’ until the day it came out. It’s only fair.”
Kyuhyun looks up from his cell phone and starts to say, “That’s completely diff-” but stops when he actually sees Sooyoung for the first time since walking in. He starts at her legs6 and moves his gaze hastily up to her face, but a look of sudden confusion crosses his face when he sees the huge beanie on her head. “Jeez, aren’t you hot, Sooyoung-ah?”
“NO,” Sooyoung says a little too loudly, making the mistake of looking away embarrassedly.
“Why are you wearing th-” She looks back up at Kyuhyun and sees a look of understanding dawn on him and a slow, dangerous-looking grin spread across his face. “Take off that hat.”
Oh my god.
“No!” Sooyoung says, trying not to sound as horrified as she feels.
Kyuhyun is now looking as though his birthday has come early, and he begins advancing toward her with the most evil grin she’s ever seen. “Sooyoung-ah. Take. Off. That. Hat.”
She reaches up, tugs the hat down firmly, and starts backing away from him, because there is no way that anyone, and especially him, is going to see this boyish haircut. (She ignores the fact that her comeback is in three days, and no matter what she will not be allowed to wear a ridiculous hat during the comeback stage.) Kyuhyun starts reaching toward her, and she suddenly breaks into a sprint, trying to get out the door before he catches her. Unfortunately, stupid GameKyu turns out to be LightningFastKyu as well, because he somehow slams the door shut right before she reaches it.
So, in a panic, Sooyoung screams and starts running around the dance studio. Kyuhyun laughs and runs after, shouting, “Sooyoung-ah, just take off the freaking hat!! I need to see this!” and she screams, “NO, OPPA!” and reaches down and takes off her shoe, throwing it in his general direction. She hears him grunt in pain and knows she’s hit him, but eventually she feels his hand on her shoulder, gets yanked back, and he pushes her into a corner, blocking her with his annoyingly tall body.
He grins like the smug, evil, handsome jerk that he is, crosses his arms, and says, “Just take off the hat, Sooyoung-ah.”
Sooyoung knows when she’s been defeated. So she gives Kyuhyun her most intense death glare and slowly reaches up to remove the hat. She feels the short strands fall into place around her ears, and closes her eyes, hoping that he’ll just laugh in her face and move on quickly. There is a long silence, and Sooyoung cracks open one eye to see if Kyuhyun has maybe fled in horror, but he’s just standing there staring at her with his hand on his chin. Finally, he says, “Oh.”
“…’Oh’? What do you mean, ‘Oh’?” Sooyoung repeats, her heart sinking. Oh my God. He hates it. He thinks I look like a boy. He thinks I look hideous. He-
Kyuhyun shrugs. “Nothing. I was hoping you had some really humiliating and embarrassing haircut, but…” -Sooyoung closes her eyes again-“…it’s pretty.”
…AHHHHH OMG I’M SO EMBARRASSED-wait…what? Sooyoung snaps her eyes open. “What…did you say??”
Kyuhyun shrugs with one shoulder. “It’s a pretty haircut. It suits you. There’s no need for the hat.”
He is about to say more, but Sooyoung then hears Kangin-oppa’s voice from somewhere in the hallway saying, “Hey, where did the maknae go? He was here five minutes ago…we’re going to be late!”
“I’m coming, hyung!” Kyuhyun shouts in the direction of the door, before turning back to Sooyoung. “You’re so weird, Sooyoung-ah. I have to go-good luck on your comeback if I don’t see you.” He flicks her lightly on the forehead before turning and walking out the door.
Sooyoung waits until she hears him disappear down the hallway and counts ten seconds before locking the door to the practice room and fangirling like a total maniac.
Needless to say, she wears the short hair with confidence for the rest of the year.
----
“Super Junior’s Leeteuk, Eunhyuk, Shindong, and Kyuhyun were in a serious car accident late last night…Maknae Cho Kyuhyun is in serious condition…the members are in and out of the hospital…he has been stabilized…Kyuhyun is in critical condition…Kyuhyun…serious…car accident…”
“SOOYOUNG!! Sooyoung-ah, relax! Wake up! It’s just a dream!” Jessica is sitting over her, shaking her frantically, and Sooyoung bolts upright, breathing heavily. She looks around and realizes that she’s in her bedroom, her sheets tangled around her legs. Jessica is looking at her with concern. “Are you okay, Sooyoungie? What’s wrong?”
The logical part of Sooyoung’s mind tells her that the accident was two years ago and that everything is fine now, but the dream was just so real that she-she-
“What time is it?” she asks, a bit wildly.
Sica checks her watch and says, “Um, it’s almost 2:00 in the afternoon, why do you-” but Sooyoung is up and running before she can finish the question.
She sprints past the kitchen and then backs up a couple steps, grabs Sunny’s pink Gameboy DS off the counter, and runs through the front door. Then she flies down the hallway to the elevator, slamming the button over and over again until the doors open. She has this sudden, irrational need to see Kyuhyun with her own two eyes, to see that he’s still being his stupid, sarcastic, handsome self and not all banged up from a horrendous car accident and-the elevator door opens on Super Junior’s floor and Sooyoung sprints out to the front door of their dorm.
She stops to fix her hair quickly and then rings the doorbell. Half a minute later, Leeteuk-oppa opens the door. She holds up the Gameboy. “Hi, oppa, I need to talk to Kyu-”
He cuts her off by slamming the door in her face. She just stands there with her mouth open, before hearing shuffling from inside the Super Junior dorm and hushed whispers of, “Just throw it in the closet!” “Put that in the sink!” Sooyoung laughs to herself, and Leeteuk-oppa opens the door once more, smiling apologetically. “Sorry about that, Sooyoung-ah…”
“Oppa, you don’t need to clean up for me. I’m not some important guest or anything,” she says, grinning and stepping inside.
“Still, we’re gentlemen,” Teukie-oppa says, laughing. “Now, you wanted the maknae?”
Sooyoung remembers immediately why she came when a flash of stretchers and broken glass comes through her mind, and she whips around and says, “Uh-yes-I need him to fix something for me-” Leeteuk looks at the GameBoy in her hand and laughs, pointing down the hallway. “GameKyu is in the third room on the right. I have a schedule, but I think Yesung and Hyukjae and some of the guys are in the kitchen if you need anything.”
He smiles and heads out the door, and Sooyoung is left standing alone in the entrance. The dorm seems quiet, and she is suddenly painfully aware that she just jumped out of bed and must look like a complete mess. She looks down at herself and sees that she’s wearing an old pair of jeans and a rumpled t-shirt. She’s not wearing any makeup, and her hair is probably really untidy. This is not how she wants to present herself to Kyuhyun…but then again, that’s not why she came here.
She starts down the hallway before she can change her mind. The door to his room is partially open, and she steels herself before knocking lightly on the doorframe and leaning into the room.
Kyuhyun is reclining on his bed reading a magazine, and when he hears the knock he looks up from the pages. His eyes widen at the sight of her, and he jumps up hastily, sputtering, “Oh--Sooyoung-ah! Hi…how are you?”
She smiles and shrugs one shoulder, and they stand looking at each other in silence for a minute before Kyuhyun coughs awkwardly and asks, “So…um, what can I do for you?”
Crap. Sooyoung suddenly wants to smack herself, because in her haste to get here, she didn’t actually come up with any excuse to offer when she finally saw him. She remembers the GameBoy in her hand and quickly says, “Uh…we were playing this game but none of us can beat this level and it’s driving me crazy and I was just wondering if you could do it for me?”
Kyuhyun stares at her. “…You came here because you want me to beat a video game for you?”
Sooyoung fights back a blush, knowing that it sounds kind of ridiculous. She hides it by crossing her arms and saying, “YES, that is why I came here, because I thought you were good at this sort of thing, but if you don’t think you can do it then I’ll just find someone else-”
Kyuhyun snatches the device out of her hands and glares at her. “I never said I couldn’t do it.”
He turns it on and Sooyoung prays that Sunny wasn’t playing Hello Kitty or some equally girly game-she sighs in relief when she hears the Mario theme song. Kyuhyun-oppa turns and leans casually against his desk as he looks down at the screen with intense concentration. The only sound in the room for a few minutes is the tick-tock of the clock and the sound of Kyuhyun pressing various buttons.
Sooyoung takes a deep breath and figures that if she’s going to say something, it’s now or never. “Oppa…about that accident that you were in two years ago…” He doesn’t say anything, but she knows that he’s listening because he stiffens and his hand has frozen on the GameBoy. She continues carefully. “We…SNSD didn’t get to come visit you in the hospital. I’m sorry. I just-I wanted to-I’m glad you’re okay now.”
He doesn’t say anything for what seems like hours, and Sooyoung is afraid she has overstepped her bounds. But he turns suddenly and looks her straight in the eyes, and she forces herself to focus on his words rather than his intense gaze. “That means a lot, Sooyoung-ah. Thanks.”
She doesn’t know what to say, so she doesn’t say anything. She can feel her cheeks burning, and pretends to look out the window so that Kyuhyun won’t see.
“That was a really…difficult time in my life,” he says quietly, and she turns back to him. “Sometimes I can’t even believe it actually happened. There were times when I thought I wouldn’t be able to sing again, or walk again, or…or anything. But it was a long time ago, and I’m perfectly fine now. So don’t feel bad-I know you would have come if you could have.” He smiles, snaps the GameBoy shut, and holds it out to her. “Done. And that level was so easy, I can’t believe you couldn’t beat it.”
She glares in response to his cheeky grin, but takes the device gently from his hand. “You’re ridiculous, oppa. But thanks. I guess I’ll just…see you later, then.”
Kyuhyun shifts his weight. He opens his mouth to say something, hesitates, and then says, “Sure. See you later.”
Sooyoung smiles and backs out of the room, and then rushes quickly down the hall and out of the dorm. She wants to go home and spend the rest of the afternoon analyzing what just happened.
She presses the button for the elevator and taps her foot as she waits. Finally she hears a ding! and the doors slide open. She’s about to walk in, but then she hears, “Sooyoung-ah! Wait!”
She turns in surprise and sees Kyuhyun hopping on one foot outside Suju’s front door, trying to pull on his sneaker. After successfully sliding it on, he jogs toward her.
Sooyoung turns and raises her eyebrows in mock-surprise. “Kyuhyun-oppa! How are you? Long time no see! You look so different from the last time I saw you…is that a new haircut?”
Kyuhyun rolls his eyes. “Cut the sarcasm for a second, Sooyoung-ah, I just have something I wanted to say.” He takes a deep breath, and then continues. “I’m glad you came…even though your gaming skills obviously suck.”
She squeals mentally--he’s glad I came!--but outwardly she says, “Yah!! At least I have a life!”
“I’m in Super Junior!! I have a better life than you!” Sooyoung is about to retort with something about how SNSD could kick Suju’s butt any day of the week, but Kyuhyun cuts her off. “Look, anyway, what I’m trying to say is, I’m really-I mean-I never really talk to anyone about the accident. We-the members-never really bring it up because it was a really hard time for all 13 of us, and my parents pretend like it never happened…so if I think about it, it’s always by myself.” He’s speaking very quickly, and Sooyoung’s chest aches as she tries hard to prevent the sudden tears that are threatening to fill her eyes. “The thing is, I’m supposed to go on Strong Heart7 tomorrow and I was sitting here all afternoon trying to figure out if I should talk about the accident or not, and I don’t want to ask the hyungs, and now that you came here and talked to me about it…I think I can do it. I’m ready.”
Sooyoung stares at him, because although Kyuhyun is clever and snarky and always has a witty comment available, it’s very rare for him to speak at length about emotional matters. Even he looks surprised at himself.
“So the point is…what I’m trying to say is…thank you.” He fidgets with his wristwatch for a moment and looks like he’s considering something.
And then Kyuhyun-oppa reaches forward and awkwardly pulls her into a hug.
Sooyoung nearly passes out from the shock.
She remains stiff for a second, trying to decide if maybe she’s still dreaming. But the seconds pass by and it’s real and she relaxes into it. It’s kind of the best moment of her life.
Kyuhyun pulls away after a minute, scratching the back of his head awkwardly and looking at the floor. “Uh, so…yeah. Have a nice day, Sooyoung-ah.” He takes a step back and bows stiffly, and then retreats rapidly down the hall. He looks as if he’s trying very hard not to run.
Sooyoung watches him go and stands in silence for a minute before slowly stepping into the elevator. It begins to descend and she watches the floor numbers drop one by one--13, 12, 11, 10...
Her heart is so warm that she thinks it might catch fire.
----
Sooyoung smoothes her hair for the hundredth time. She is sitting alone at a table for two in the café at the bottom of their apartment building, and she is waiting for Kyuhyun-oppa, who is now 15 minutes late for their date.
Okay, okay, it’s not a date, but Sooyoung wants to pretend that it is. In reality, she’s supposed to give Kyuhyun a short Japanese lesson before Super Junior KRY’s first concert in Tokyo8. SM’s normal Japanese tutor is sick with the flu, and SNSD’s manager had called earlier to inform her that she was the last-minute replacement.
Sooyoung takes a deep breath and turns her coffee mug in her hands, trying to calm herself down. She’s nervous. She hasn’t seen Kyuhyun-oppa for almost a month, because SNSD is so busy with their own preparations for entering the Japanese market. Sooyoung has been so swamped with schedules recently that she’s barely had time to sleep.
She’s jolted out of her thoughts as the chair across from her is pulled back with a loud scraping noise, and Sooyoung looks up quickly to see Kyuhyun settling himself into his seat.
“I’m really sorry I’m late, Sooyoung-ah…Donghae-hyung was driving me and we had to stop for gas,” Kyuhyun says, shrugging off his jacket. He leans down and pulls a notebook and pen out of his backpack, and places them on the table. Looking up, he says, “Ready?”
Sooyoung smiles, “Sure, go ahead.”
He has a long list of phrases, and as Sooyoung carefully recites each one in Japanese, Kyuhyun writes it down on the sheet. “Hello, Tokyo!” “Did you miss us?” “We are Super Junior KRY!” “Are you ready?” on and on and on. The sun has almost set completely when Kyuhyun finally says, “Alright, Sooyoung-ah. Last one. How do you say, ‘I love you’?”
He’s still in the middle of writing the last one, and she looks at his dark hair while he’s bent over. Everything seems to freeze, and Sooyoung stares at his elegant fingers clutching the pen, the loose thread on the hood of his sweater, the light scar on his wrist that’s peeking out from under his sleeve, the text message from Kangin-oppa on the cell phone that he left open on the table because he never has anything to hide.
Time unfreezes when Kyuhyun looks up at her expectantly, hand poised to write. And Sooyoung wishes that she could refreeze it, right here, right at this moment with him and her and nothing else.
But that’s not possible. Because in the real world, she’s in SNSD, and Kyuhyun-oppa is in Super Junior, and ten years ago she signed her name on a dotted line and gave up her right to love any guy in SM. Ten years ago, she didn’t have a problem agreeing to that condition, because she never even dreamed that she would care about anyone like that. But then Cho Kyuhyun came along.
And tonight he’s sitting right across from her, and their shoes are casually touching underneath the table, and a little part of her wants to break into Lee Soo Man’s office and find that contract and rip it into little pieces, just so that she can say one time, “Hey, Kyuhyun-oppa, guess what, I completely love you.”
But Sooyoung loves SNSD too much to ever walk away, and there are eight girls waiting for her at home, and so it’s all about hiding it. She wishes she could sit and contemplate this further, but Kyuhyun’s ironic question is still hanging in the air--How do you say ‘I love you’?
So she sighs, looks straight into his dark eyes, and whispers, “Aishiteru.”
(She just wishes she could tell him how much she means it.)
-------------------------
1. Supergirl MV and Korean Version
2. Chunji Clip 1--Strawberries
3. Chunji Clip 2--Sungmin's Dance Cut
4. Kyuhyun's Call to Chunji
5. Sooyoung's Silly Hat^^
6. Kyuhyun's Ideal Type
7. Kyuhyun on Strong Heart
8. Super Junior KRY's Concert
romance.
pg.
This is the Sooyoung chapter of a longer series I have, but I think it can stand on its own, too. The footnotes/links at the bottom are to videos and pictures and articles, because I try to base the chapters on reality. (But if anyone still has questions, please feel free to comment xD) Anyway, here it is~
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5.
The night that Super Junior M’s ‘Supergirl’ music video1 is released, the nine girls of SNSD crowd around the computer in their dorm holding pillows and stuffed animals and toothbrushes. There’s a buzz in the room, because everyone is waiting to see Jessica’s cameo in the video.
As Taeyeon types in the website, all the members are talking at once:
“Okay, you guys, nobody’s allowed to laugh at me-”
“Hyoyeon-unnie can just translate it for us, she knows Mandarin-”
“Sica-ya, I’m so jealous, Henry-shii and Zhoumi-shii are soooo cute-”
“Yuri-ah, how come you’re standing in front when I’m the shortest?”
“Omo, I’m so excited-”
Sooyoung raises her box of noodles closer to her face so that the food has less distance to travel. As the tallest, she’s standing behind all the other members. (Take those long legs to the back, Sooyoung-ah, Hyoyeon had said, sticking her tongue out jokingly.)
Sooyoung shoves a bunch of noodles into her mouth to distract herself while the video is loading, because she has been waiting for this MV release for weeks now. Super Junior M is her favorite subgroup of the band, and she saw the Supergirl teaser when it came out, and she really wants to see how all the members are styled with this newest comeback. She’s especially curious to see how Kyuhyun-oppa will look.
Not that she likes him or anything. Because she doesn’t. It’s just pure curiosity.
Sooyoung stuffs some more food into her mouth to seal that thought.
Finally, the video loads completely. Everyone is squealing and jumping around in anticipation, and Taeyeon goes into umma-mode and makes sure everyone is quiet before she clicks 'play'. All nine members are completely silent for the duration of the music video.
When it finally ends, there is a pause for two seconds before noise erupts through the dorm. Jessica is immediately engulfed in a nine-person hug, and the girls can't stop gushing about what they've just seen.
Sooyoung is in love. She is in love with the Chinese language, with the song, with the lyrics (after Hyoyeon translates), with Henry-shii's popping and Ryeowook-oppa’s smile, with Sica's role and Sica's dancing and gosh the members are so talented and she loves them so much. Sooyoung is also in love with Kyuhyun-oppa.
The thought hits her like a truck and literally stops her mid-stride to the kitchen.
She’s glad she finished the noodles earlier, because she drops the empty box to the floor with the shock of the realization.
In love. With Cho-freaking-Kyuhyun. Like actually in love with him. Like exactly what Sooyoung has been trying to convince herself for months that she is not.
The thought comes directly and kind of easily, as though she hasn’t built up any resistance at all, as though it’s the first time she’s ever had the idea. She’s been telling herself for ages that he’s just another guy, that she’s not allowed to, that baby crushes go away all the time.
The wall that she’s built up comes crumbling down without warning, and Sooyoung has to sit down at the kitchen table as the weight of how much she cares about Kyuhyun hits her. She doesn’t know why exactly this music video made her realize, but it did. It’s not the fact that he was wearing a suit, or that his haircut looks good on him, or the way she feels like his stupid dark eyes look into her soul while he’s singing. It’s everything. It’s him.
Sooyoung leans back in her chair and realizes that she’s lost the battle.
And while Sooyoung is terrified of what will happen if anyone were to find out, it’s also kind of a relief to just admit it.
Time to stop lying to yourself, Choi Sooyoung.
She stays up late into the night the day the Korean version of Supergirl1 comes out, purchasing the song, downloading the software, writing down the times of the segment she wants, cutting it out of the song, downloading more software, converting it into a ringtone file, sending it to her cell phone, and selecting it as her ringer. It is a lot of work and luckily Jessica sleeps through anything, but finally Sooyoung crawls into bed and lies quietly as the screen lights up her face, before carefully turning down the volume and selecting 'play ringtone'. Kyuhyun's low, smooth voice comes through the speakers, saying, "Woah-ohh, you're my, you're my baby girl..." She knows enough English from Fany and Sica to know what it means. She falls asleep that night playing it over and over to herself and imagining girlishly that he's saying it to her.
So maybe she's kind of obsessed with him. Big deal.
----
Sooyoung pushes the door to her room open with her shoulder, her arms full of the perfectly folded laundry that Hyoyeon has just given her, and sees Sunny lying on her stomach, staring at a laptop. Sooyoung throws the clothes carelessly onto her bed and flops down next to Sunny. “Whatcha doing?” she asks, peering at the screen.
“Watching old Chunji videos,” Sunny mumbles, as a clip of her and Sungmin wildly lip-synching a random song and eating strawberries comes to an end2. She opens a folder full of video files and clicks one at random.
A video entitled ‘Sungmin Dance Time’ pops up on the screen3. It takes Sooyoung a second to understand what’s going on, but eventually she realizes that Sungmin has a certain amount of time to dance to whatever music happens to play during the duration of the game. He looks embarrassed in the video. Sunny looks thrilled.
The music starts off as a heavy techno beat, then switches to SNSD, then Super Junior’s ‘U’, on and on. At one point, Sungmin grabs Sunny’s hand and pulls her up to dance-she protests, but he gets a tight grip on both of her wrists and forces her into a silly little dance, and she can’t help but laugh as he twirls her around like a marionette.
In real life, Sooyoung turns to the side to comment on how cute it is-and stops dead at the look on Sunny’s face. Something in her expression is a little sad, a little nostalgic, and it makes a strange thought occur to Sooyoung. And all of a sudden Sooyoung has this irrational desire to ask Sunny if she-if Sungmin-if Sunny likes-
But something stops her from asking. Because Sunny is older, Sunny knows the rules, Sunny had to fight like crazy to gain acceptance in SM. Sunny knows-more than anyone-how much words can hurt. Sunny wouldn’t throw it all away for a guy.
The video ends while Sooyoung is lost in her thoughts. Sunny sighs and then shakes her head, smiling brightly. Clicking out of the video, she sits up and stretches, saying, “I’m going to go see if Yoona wants to play video games…do you want to come?”
Sooyoung is about to say yes, but then she remembers something. Something that involves Chunji and Kyuhyun-oppa, something that she’d forgotten about until just now. So instead, she says, “Um, no thanks…Sunny-ah, do you mind if I look through some of these?”
“Of course not, Sooyoungie! If you change your mind about playing with us, just come into the family room.” Sunny smiles and bounds out of the room.
The second Sunny is out of sight, Sooyoung turns and throws herself at the laptop. She searches frantically until she finds the video that she wants, clicking on it so hard that she nearly breaks the keyboard. A video player opens after a few seconds of loading, and Sooyoung sees herself sitting next to Sungmin, rather than Sunny. Judging by the party hats on their heads, this must be some kind of radio anniversary-100 days, if she remembers correctly4. It feels like a long time ago.
In the video, Sungmin says, “Now we’ll have a special surprise caller…” and after a moment, Kyuhyun’s voice comes through on the speakers. He begins to make fun of her immediately, and Sooyoung rolls her eyes and skips forward in the video.
Video-Sungmin is the middle of saying, “Kyuhyun-sshi, I love you,” and Sooyoung holds her breath because the part she’s waiting for is coming up.
“Sooyoung-sshi…Sooyoung-shii?” Kyuhyun says, trying to speak over Sungmin.
“Yes?” Video-Sooyoung responds.
“I love you.”
Video-Sooyoung squeals and responds, “I love you, too!” before breaking out into random English. “I love you, you love me, we love each other!”
Video-Kyuhyun laughs and says, “…I’m fine thank you, and you?”
Back in real life, Sooyoung pauses the video and spazzes to herself. She’s about to press the replay button to watch it over and over again, but then she hears Tiffany shout, “SOOYOUNG-AH, PLEASE COME IN HERE AND PLAY WITH US, WE NEED YOUUUU!”
The rest of the girls join the chorus, pleading with Sooyoung to come play, so she quits the video and bounds out of the room.
Her smile, however, doesn’t leave her face for the rest of the day.
----
Sooyoung will never admit it to anyone, but she cries for an hour after they chop off her hair for Genie. She refuses to leave the dorm for three days, moping around and watching sappy dramas in her bedroom. Eventually, however, Taeyeon barges in and tells her that the comeback is in three days, and she doesn’t care if Sooyoung has to practice with a bag over her head as long as she’s got the dance down perfectly.
Sooyoung pouts heavily, but knows that Taeyeon is right. An embarrassing haircut would be nothing compared to messing up the Genie dance in front of the entire world during their comeback stage. So she changes her clothes, rummages around in her closet for the ridiculous pom-pom hat she bought in Japan5, and shoves all her hair up inside of it. Then she takes a deep breath and makes her way to the front door.
Fifteen minutes later, she’s standing alone, dancing her heart out in the practice room. She knows she must look totally ridiculous in a big t-shirt she borrowed from Tiffany and short white shorts and high heels and the stupid hat on her head, but she stands up proudly and practices the leg-kicking dance. Everything is going okay, but Sooyoung freezes with her leg in the air when Cho Kyuhyun slams open the door and leans into the room.
He is looking down at his phone as he simultaneously texts someone and speaks to Sooyoung. “Hey, Sooyoung-ah. Your comeback is in a few days, right? Give me a sneak preview of the dance.”
Trying to maintain composure, Sooyoung shakes herself out of her shock and runs over to the CD player, shutting it off right in the middle of, “I’m a genie for your dream!” She steadies her voice and says, “No way, Kyuhyun-oppa, you have to wait just like everyone else. Besides, I think you’re forgetting the fact that you wouldn’t even let us listen to ‘Sorry, Sorry’ until the day it came out. It’s only fair.”
Kyuhyun looks up from his cell phone and starts to say, “That’s completely diff-” but stops when he actually sees Sooyoung for the first time since walking in. He starts at her legs6 and moves his gaze hastily up to her face, but a look of sudden confusion crosses his face when he sees the huge beanie on her head. “Jeez, aren’t you hot, Sooyoung-ah?”
“NO,” Sooyoung says a little too loudly, making the mistake of looking away embarrassedly.
“Why are you wearing th-” She looks back up at Kyuhyun and sees a look of understanding dawn on him and a slow, dangerous-looking grin spread across his face. “Take off that hat.”
Oh my god.
“No!” Sooyoung says, trying not to sound as horrified as she feels.
Kyuhyun is now looking as though his birthday has come early, and he begins advancing toward her with the most evil grin she’s ever seen. “Sooyoung-ah. Take. Off. That. Hat.”
She reaches up, tugs the hat down firmly, and starts backing away from him, because there is no way that anyone, and especially him, is going to see this boyish haircut. (She ignores the fact that her comeback is in three days, and no matter what she will not be allowed to wear a ridiculous hat during the comeback stage.) Kyuhyun starts reaching toward her, and she suddenly breaks into a sprint, trying to get out the door before he catches her. Unfortunately, stupid GameKyu turns out to be LightningFastKyu as well, because he somehow slams the door shut right before she reaches it.
So, in a panic, Sooyoung screams and starts running around the dance studio. Kyuhyun laughs and runs after, shouting, “Sooyoung-ah, just take off the freaking hat!! I need to see this!” and she screams, “NO, OPPA!” and reaches down and takes off her shoe, throwing it in his general direction. She hears him grunt in pain and knows she’s hit him, but eventually she feels his hand on her shoulder, gets yanked back, and he pushes her into a corner, blocking her with his annoyingly tall body.
He grins like the smug, evil, handsome jerk that he is, crosses his arms, and says, “Just take off the hat, Sooyoung-ah.”
Sooyoung knows when she’s been defeated. So she gives Kyuhyun her most intense death glare and slowly reaches up to remove the hat. She feels the short strands fall into place around her ears, and closes her eyes, hoping that he’ll just laugh in her face and move on quickly. There is a long silence, and Sooyoung cracks open one eye to see if Kyuhyun has maybe fled in horror, but he’s just standing there staring at her with his hand on his chin. Finally, he says, “Oh.”
“…’Oh’? What do you mean, ‘Oh’?” Sooyoung repeats, her heart sinking. Oh my God. He hates it. He thinks I look like a boy. He thinks I look hideous. He-
Kyuhyun shrugs. “Nothing. I was hoping you had some really humiliating and embarrassing haircut, but…” -Sooyoung closes her eyes again-“…it’s pretty.”
…AHHHHH OMG I’M SO EMBARRASSED-wait…what? Sooyoung snaps her eyes open. “What…did you say??”
Kyuhyun shrugs with one shoulder. “It’s a pretty haircut. It suits you. There’s no need for the hat.”
He is about to say more, but Sooyoung then hears Kangin-oppa’s voice from somewhere in the hallway saying, “Hey, where did the maknae go? He was here five minutes ago…we’re going to be late!”
“I’m coming, hyung!” Kyuhyun shouts in the direction of the door, before turning back to Sooyoung. “You’re so weird, Sooyoung-ah. I have to go-good luck on your comeback if I don’t see you.” He flicks her lightly on the forehead before turning and walking out the door.
Sooyoung waits until she hears him disappear down the hallway and counts ten seconds before locking the door to the practice room and fangirling like a total maniac.
Needless to say, she wears the short hair with confidence for the rest of the year.
----
“Super Junior’s Leeteuk, Eunhyuk, Shindong, and Kyuhyun were in a serious car accident late last night…Maknae Cho Kyuhyun is in serious condition…the members are in and out of the hospital…he has been stabilized…Kyuhyun is in critical condition…Kyuhyun…serious…car accident…”
“SOOYOUNG!! Sooyoung-ah, relax! Wake up! It’s just a dream!” Jessica is sitting over her, shaking her frantically, and Sooyoung bolts upright, breathing heavily. She looks around and realizes that she’s in her bedroom, her sheets tangled around her legs. Jessica is looking at her with concern. “Are you okay, Sooyoungie? What’s wrong?”
The logical part of Sooyoung’s mind tells her that the accident was two years ago and that everything is fine now, but the dream was just so real that she-she-
“What time is it?” she asks, a bit wildly.
Sica checks her watch and says, “Um, it’s almost 2:00 in the afternoon, why do you-” but Sooyoung is up and running before she can finish the question.
She sprints past the kitchen and then backs up a couple steps, grabs Sunny’s pink Gameboy DS off the counter, and runs through the front door. Then she flies down the hallway to the elevator, slamming the button over and over again until the doors open. She has this sudden, irrational need to see Kyuhyun with her own two eyes, to see that he’s still being his stupid, sarcastic, handsome self and not all banged up from a horrendous car accident and-the elevator door opens on Super Junior’s floor and Sooyoung sprints out to the front door of their dorm.
She stops to fix her hair quickly and then rings the doorbell. Half a minute later, Leeteuk-oppa opens the door. She holds up the Gameboy. “Hi, oppa, I need to talk to Kyu-”
He cuts her off by slamming the door in her face. She just stands there with her mouth open, before hearing shuffling from inside the Super Junior dorm and hushed whispers of, “Just throw it in the closet!” “Put that in the sink!” Sooyoung laughs to herself, and Leeteuk-oppa opens the door once more, smiling apologetically. “Sorry about that, Sooyoung-ah…”
“Oppa, you don’t need to clean up for me. I’m not some important guest or anything,” she says, grinning and stepping inside.
“Still, we’re gentlemen,” Teukie-oppa says, laughing. “Now, you wanted the maknae?”
Sooyoung remembers immediately why she came when a flash of stretchers and broken glass comes through her mind, and she whips around and says, “Uh-yes-I need him to fix something for me-” Leeteuk looks at the GameBoy in her hand and laughs, pointing down the hallway. “GameKyu is in the third room on the right. I have a schedule, but I think Yesung and Hyukjae and some of the guys are in the kitchen if you need anything.”
He smiles and heads out the door, and Sooyoung is left standing alone in the entrance. The dorm seems quiet, and she is suddenly painfully aware that she just jumped out of bed and must look like a complete mess. She looks down at herself and sees that she’s wearing an old pair of jeans and a rumpled t-shirt. She’s not wearing any makeup, and her hair is probably really untidy. This is not how she wants to present herself to Kyuhyun…but then again, that’s not why she came here.
She starts down the hallway before she can change her mind. The door to his room is partially open, and she steels herself before knocking lightly on the doorframe and leaning into the room.
Kyuhyun is reclining on his bed reading a magazine, and when he hears the knock he looks up from the pages. His eyes widen at the sight of her, and he jumps up hastily, sputtering, “Oh--Sooyoung-ah! Hi…how are you?”
She smiles and shrugs one shoulder, and they stand looking at each other in silence for a minute before Kyuhyun coughs awkwardly and asks, “So…um, what can I do for you?”
Crap. Sooyoung suddenly wants to smack herself, because in her haste to get here, she didn’t actually come up with any excuse to offer when she finally saw him. She remembers the GameBoy in her hand and quickly says, “Uh…we were playing this game but none of us can beat this level and it’s driving me crazy and I was just wondering if you could do it for me?”
Kyuhyun stares at her. “…You came here because you want me to beat a video game for you?”
Sooyoung fights back a blush, knowing that it sounds kind of ridiculous. She hides it by crossing her arms and saying, “YES, that is why I came here, because I thought you were good at this sort of thing, but if you don’t think you can do it then I’ll just find someone else-”
Kyuhyun snatches the device out of her hands and glares at her. “I never said I couldn’t do it.”
He turns it on and Sooyoung prays that Sunny wasn’t playing Hello Kitty or some equally girly game-she sighs in relief when she hears the Mario theme song. Kyuhyun-oppa turns and leans casually against his desk as he looks down at the screen with intense concentration. The only sound in the room for a few minutes is the tick-tock of the clock and the sound of Kyuhyun pressing various buttons.
Sooyoung takes a deep breath and figures that if she’s going to say something, it’s now or never. “Oppa…about that accident that you were in two years ago…” He doesn’t say anything, but she knows that he’s listening because he stiffens and his hand has frozen on the GameBoy. She continues carefully. “We…SNSD didn’t get to come visit you in the hospital. I’m sorry. I just-I wanted to-I’m glad you’re okay now.”
He doesn’t say anything for what seems like hours, and Sooyoung is afraid she has overstepped her bounds. But he turns suddenly and looks her straight in the eyes, and she forces herself to focus on his words rather than his intense gaze. “That means a lot, Sooyoung-ah. Thanks.”
She doesn’t know what to say, so she doesn’t say anything. She can feel her cheeks burning, and pretends to look out the window so that Kyuhyun won’t see.
“That was a really…difficult time in my life,” he says quietly, and she turns back to him. “Sometimes I can’t even believe it actually happened. There were times when I thought I wouldn’t be able to sing again, or walk again, or…or anything. But it was a long time ago, and I’m perfectly fine now. So don’t feel bad-I know you would have come if you could have.” He smiles, snaps the GameBoy shut, and holds it out to her. “Done. And that level was so easy, I can’t believe you couldn’t beat it.”
She glares in response to his cheeky grin, but takes the device gently from his hand. “You’re ridiculous, oppa. But thanks. I guess I’ll just…see you later, then.”
Kyuhyun shifts his weight. He opens his mouth to say something, hesitates, and then says, “Sure. See you later.”
Sooyoung smiles and backs out of the room, and then rushes quickly down the hall and out of the dorm. She wants to go home and spend the rest of the afternoon analyzing what just happened.
She presses the button for the elevator and taps her foot as she waits. Finally she hears a ding! and the doors slide open. She’s about to walk in, but then she hears, “Sooyoung-ah! Wait!”
She turns in surprise and sees Kyuhyun hopping on one foot outside Suju’s front door, trying to pull on his sneaker. After successfully sliding it on, he jogs toward her.
Sooyoung turns and raises her eyebrows in mock-surprise. “Kyuhyun-oppa! How are you? Long time no see! You look so different from the last time I saw you…is that a new haircut?”
Kyuhyun rolls his eyes. “Cut the sarcasm for a second, Sooyoung-ah, I just have something I wanted to say.” He takes a deep breath, and then continues. “I’m glad you came…even though your gaming skills obviously suck.”
She squeals mentally--he’s glad I came!--but outwardly she says, “Yah!! At least I have a life!”
“I’m in Super Junior!! I have a better life than you!” Sooyoung is about to retort with something about how SNSD could kick Suju’s butt any day of the week, but Kyuhyun cuts her off. “Look, anyway, what I’m trying to say is, I’m really-I mean-I never really talk to anyone about the accident. We-the members-never really bring it up because it was a really hard time for all 13 of us, and my parents pretend like it never happened…so if I think about it, it’s always by myself.” He’s speaking very quickly, and Sooyoung’s chest aches as she tries hard to prevent the sudden tears that are threatening to fill her eyes. “The thing is, I’m supposed to go on Strong Heart7 tomorrow and I was sitting here all afternoon trying to figure out if I should talk about the accident or not, and I don’t want to ask the hyungs, and now that you came here and talked to me about it…I think I can do it. I’m ready.”
Sooyoung stares at him, because although Kyuhyun is clever and snarky and always has a witty comment available, it’s very rare for him to speak at length about emotional matters. Even he looks surprised at himself.
“So the point is…what I’m trying to say is…thank you.” He fidgets with his wristwatch for a moment and looks like he’s considering something.
And then Kyuhyun-oppa reaches forward and awkwardly pulls her into a hug.
Sooyoung nearly passes out from the shock.
She remains stiff for a second, trying to decide if maybe she’s still dreaming. But the seconds pass by and it’s real and she relaxes into it. It’s kind of the best moment of her life.
Kyuhyun pulls away after a minute, scratching the back of his head awkwardly and looking at the floor. “Uh, so…yeah. Have a nice day, Sooyoung-ah.” He takes a step back and bows stiffly, and then retreats rapidly down the hall. He looks as if he’s trying very hard not to run.
Sooyoung watches him go and stands in silence for a minute before slowly stepping into the elevator. It begins to descend and she watches the floor numbers drop one by one--13, 12, 11, 10...
Her heart is so warm that she thinks it might catch fire.
----
Sooyoung smoothes her hair for the hundredth time. She is sitting alone at a table for two in the café at the bottom of their apartment building, and she is waiting for Kyuhyun-oppa, who is now 15 minutes late for their date.
Okay, okay, it’s not a date, but Sooyoung wants to pretend that it is. In reality, she’s supposed to give Kyuhyun a short Japanese lesson before Super Junior KRY’s first concert in Tokyo8. SM’s normal Japanese tutor is sick with the flu, and SNSD’s manager had called earlier to inform her that she was the last-minute replacement.
Sooyoung takes a deep breath and turns her coffee mug in her hands, trying to calm herself down. She’s nervous. She hasn’t seen Kyuhyun-oppa for almost a month, because SNSD is so busy with their own preparations for entering the Japanese market. Sooyoung has been so swamped with schedules recently that she’s barely had time to sleep.
She’s jolted out of her thoughts as the chair across from her is pulled back with a loud scraping noise, and Sooyoung looks up quickly to see Kyuhyun settling himself into his seat.
“I’m really sorry I’m late, Sooyoung-ah…Donghae-hyung was driving me and we had to stop for gas,” Kyuhyun says, shrugging off his jacket. He leans down and pulls a notebook and pen out of his backpack, and places them on the table. Looking up, he says, “Ready?”
Sooyoung smiles, “Sure, go ahead.”
He has a long list of phrases, and as Sooyoung carefully recites each one in Japanese, Kyuhyun writes it down on the sheet. “Hello, Tokyo!” “Did you miss us?” “We are Super Junior KRY!” “Are you ready?” on and on and on. The sun has almost set completely when Kyuhyun finally says, “Alright, Sooyoung-ah. Last one. How do you say, ‘I love you’?”
He’s still in the middle of writing the last one, and she looks at his dark hair while he’s bent over. Everything seems to freeze, and Sooyoung stares at his elegant fingers clutching the pen, the loose thread on the hood of his sweater, the light scar on his wrist that’s peeking out from under his sleeve, the text message from Kangin-oppa on the cell phone that he left open on the table because he never has anything to hide.
Time unfreezes when Kyuhyun looks up at her expectantly, hand poised to write. And Sooyoung wishes that she could refreeze it, right here, right at this moment with him and her and nothing else.
But that’s not possible. Because in the real world, she’s in SNSD, and Kyuhyun-oppa is in Super Junior, and ten years ago she signed her name on a dotted line and gave up her right to love any guy in SM. Ten years ago, she didn’t have a problem agreeing to that condition, because she never even dreamed that she would care about anyone like that. But then Cho Kyuhyun came along.
And tonight he’s sitting right across from her, and their shoes are casually touching underneath the table, and a little part of her wants to break into Lee Soo Man’s office and find that contract and rip it into little pieces, just so that she can say one time, “Hey, Kyuhyun-oppa, guess what, I completely love you.”
But Sooyoung loves SNSD too much to ever walk away, and there are eight girls waiting for her at home, and so it’s all about hiding it. She wishes she could sit and contemplate this further, but Kyuhyun’s ironic question is still hanging in the air--How do you say ‘I love you’?
So she sighs, looks straight into his dark eyes, and whispers, “Aishiteru.”
(She just wishes she could tell him how much she means it.)
-------------------------
1. Supergirl MV and Korean Version
2. Chunji Clip 1--Strawberries
3. Chunji Clip 2--Sungmin's Dance Cut
4. Kyuhyun's Call to Chunji
5. Sooyoung's Silly Hat^^
6. Kyuhyun's Ideal Type
7. Kyuhyun on Strong Heart
8. Super Junior KRY's Concert