(no subject)
I resent the way I was brought into this fucking world.
I am 1 of 7 children.
Most of you here are have 1 or no siblings.
everything ya'll got, divide by 7 and that is what I got, 1/7 of my parents attention. 1/7 of the money for new clothes, 1/7 the school supplies, I was always having to ask people for paper and pencils.
my family has always been poor.
I was raised in a 3 bedroom house that had no sheet rock on the walls and no central A/C or heat, infact I electrocuted myself on one of the space heaters we used and had to go to the hospital.
I don't know where I am going with this but I am crying all over the place.
I had to make a decision when I was 7 to live with my mom or dad, I had to go to a psychologist who made me draw a picture with my mom on one side and my dad on the other side and then draw myself on it, I cried.
they made me take and I.Q. test and said I was smart but very immature.
I decided to live with my dad, he married a woman he didn't really like so she could help take care of me and my 2 brothers and sister that stayed with him. I didn't like her and she didn't like any of us.
I didn't like living with him so I did theworst I could in school so they would let me live with my mom.
my mom married a man she knew for 3 months and austin and I moved in shortly after, he was bipolar, schizophrenic or however the fuck it is spelled and a drunk, he hit my mom a few times but I was to young and to much of a coward to do anything about it. On that note, my dad slapped my mom across the face in mexico and broke her nose right infront of me in the car, I jumped in between them and got hit once too.
my step dad went to iraq to work on A/C s or something and cheated on my mom.
my sister, who is really my half sister by the way, her great grandfather founded exxon, she has a trust fund that pays for everything, her house, her car, her education, she just has to pay her bills.
I got the short end of the stick on everything, so did my brothers and sisters except her, I resent her for that... and now I pay her rent to stay with her.
I hate my life, I wasn't given a chance and now I am doing nothing with it.
I got a part time job at walmart in the garden center, I was working with a 35 year old man who was getting paid the same as me for moving 60lb bags of soil into cars, 7.60 while pencil pushers made double that for doing nothing.
I hate the way people can spend years working out in the sun getting heatstroke and get paid shit for it and others get paid to sit in an office and do nothing, I bet they didn't have 6 brothers and sisters though.
I guess I resent ya'll too, tim you have just one brother, you get half your parents love, you also got a car.
Matt, I don't even want to start.
Kevin, your parents pay for your college
Erik... nevermind, your life sucks too.
I have shit luck with women, I have given up on that entirely.
I don't trust the world, they are always looking for a way to fuck you over. Someone wants your money somewhere.
Bagwell once told me I could have been validictorian if I had tried, I think he was lieing, his family is rich fuck him.
Really when it comes down to it I guess I resent everyone better off than me and that is just about everyone.
I love ya'll but I hate my lot in life, colleges don't want me cuz I fucked up in school, the marines didn't want me cuz I got mad, hit a wall, and broke my wrist. I am a white male and can't get a grant. I am still crying by the way.
I play WOW because it gives me a sense of accomplishment, I log on and people say "Hey Mighty Mitan" I go do things it takes 3 other people not as good as me at the game to do and feel accomplished, it is just a game and those other 3 people probably have a bachelors in something or other. I am getting dumber the longer I am out of school, I will have to use spell check when I am done with this because I can't remember to spell some of the words.
If anyone is still reading this you probably think I am emo or some lame shit, well I broke down earlier, my mom came after me with a baseball bat because I was disrespecting her, I probably was but I am paying my sister rent to live in her house, I am a few days away from 19 and I don't really think she has any authority over me. I wouldn't hit her back but I got slapped 5 or 6 times and hit in the arm with the bat once, she swung at my head but I caught it and took it from her, I gave it to my sister to put away.
I typed /played into wow earlier and it said I have played my druid for 39 days straight, my shaman for nearly as much, the thing is a I don't give a shit and quit like kevin did. I don't want to do anything with my life, I am a huge fuck up when it comes down to it.
I will likely go back to playing it tomorrow because I have nothing better to do.
well, I am done crying and I guess I will go ahead and post this.
I did not mean to offend anyone in this.
I like all of ya'll even if you got a better hand dealt to ya.
Edit: thought I would add, I am an Atheist, always have been, I have NEVER beleived in a god and just didn't want to say it because I thought I would be rejected by the crazy folks.
I pretended just so I could fit in.
I am 1 of 7 children.
Most of you here are have 1 or no siblings.
everything ya'll got, divide by 7 and that is what I got, 1/7 of my parents attention. 1/7 of the money for new clothes, 1/7 the school supplies, I was always having to ask people for paper and pencils.
my family has always been poor.
I was raised in a 3 bedroom house that had no sheet rock on the walls and no central A/C or heat, infact I electrocuted myself on one of the space heaters we used and had to go to the hospital.
I don't know where I am going with this but I am crying all over the place.
I had to make a decision when I was 7 to live with my mom or dad, I had to go to a psychologist who made me draw a picture with my mom on one side and my dad on the other side and then draw myself on it, I cried.
they made me take and I.Q. test and said I was smart but very immature.
I decided to live with my dad, he married a woman he didn't really like so she could help take care of me and my 2 brothers and sister that stayed with him. I didn't like her and she didn't like any of us.
I didn't like living with him so I did theworst I could in school so they would let me live with my mom.
my mom married a man she knew for 3 months and austin and I moved in shortly after, he was bipolar, schizophrenic or however the fuck it is spelled and a drunk, he hit my mom a few times but I was to young and to much of a coward to do anything about it. On that note, my dad slapped my mom across the face in mexico and broke her nose right infront of me in the car, I jumped in between them and got hit once too.
my step dad went to iraq to work on A/C s or something and cheated on my mom.
my sister, who is really my half sister by the way, her great grandfather founded exxon, she has a trust fund that pays for everything, her house, her car, her education, she just has to pay her bills.
I got the short end of the stick on everything, so did my brothers and sisters except her, I resent her for that... and now I pay her rent to stay with her.
I hate my life, I wasn't given a chance and now I am doing nothing with it.
I got a part time job at walmart in the garden center, I was working with a 35 year old man who was getting paid the same as me for moving 60lb bags of soil into cars, 7.60 while pencil pushers made double that for doing nothing.
I hate the way people can spend years working out in the sun getting heatstroke and get paid shit for it and others get paid to sit in an office and do nothing, I bet they didn't have 6 brothers and sisters though.
I guess I resent ya'll too, tim you have just one brother, you get half your parents love, you also got a car.
Matt, I don't even want to start.
Kevin, your parents pay for your college
Erik... nevermind, your life sucks too.
I have shit luck with women, I have given up on that entirely.
I don't trust the world, they are always looking for a way to fuck you over. Someone wants your money somewhere.
Bagwell once told me I could have been validictorian if I had tried, I think he was lieing, his family is rich fuck him.
Really when it comes down to it I guess I resent everyone better off than me and that is just about everyone.
I love ya'll but I hate my lot in life, colleges don't want me cuz I fucked up in school, the marines didn't want me cuz I got mad, hit a wall, and broke my wrist. I am a white male and can't get a grant. I am still crying by the way.
I play WOW because it gives me a sense of accomplishment, I log on and people say "Hey Mighty Mitan" I go do things it takes 3 other people not as good as me at the game to do and feel accomplished, it is just a game and those other 3 people probably have a bachelors in something or other. I am getting dumber the longer I am out of school, I will have to use spell check when I am done with this because I can't remember to spell some of the words.
If anyone is still reading this you probably think I am emo or some lame shit, well I broke down earlier, my mom came after me with a baseball bat because I was disrespecting her, I probably was but I am paying my sister rent to live in her house, I am a few days away from 19 and I don't really think she has any authority over me. I wouldn't hit her back but I got slapped 5 or 6 times and hit in the arm with the bat once, she swung at my head but I caught it and took it from her, I gave it to my sister to put away.
I typed /played into wow earlier and it said I have played my druid for 39 days straight, my shaman for nearly as much, the thing is a I don't give a shit and quit like kevin did. I don't want to do anything with my life, I am a huge fuck up when it comes down to it.
I will likely go back to playing it tomorrow because I have nothing better to do.
well, I am done crying and I guess I will go ahead and post this.
I did not mean to offend anyone in this.
I like all of ya'll even if you got a better hand dealt to ya.
Edit: thought I would add, I am an Atheist, always have been, I have NEVER beleived in a god and just didn't want to say it because I thought I would be rejected by the crazy folks.
I pretended just so I could fit in.