[Fic] Untitled
Title: Untitled (The fic is actually titled untitled, not that it doesn't have a title XD)
Author: michechu
Rating: R
Pairings: WolfCon, YuuWolfCon.
Warnings: Possibly some spoilers from season one. Incest, HINTED bestiality, sexual themes, and riverdancing. In a good way.
Summary: Shameless crackfic.
The air was crisp with the scent of morning dew and carried with it a cool breeze. Inside Covenant Castle, three brothers stood over a hulking mass of documents.
They had argued for over an hour about the circumstances of heresy in a neighboring village. It was a trivial dispute that had not called for national crisis nor had it required even the presence of their king.
No one suspected any foul play in the least.
"What do you mean, 'no one suspected any foul play'? It's a soldier's duty to be prepared for the worst!"
Wolfram's comment was deleted.
"Deleted?!"
Delete, delete, delete. Wolfram knew that if he said anything out of line, he would pay for it.
"How dare you!"
Conrad took a step towards his younger brother, grabbing him by the shoulders and leaning in until he was almost nose-to-nose with the blonde. "Wolfram, I think it's time that you and I get re-acquianted." There was a disturbing rip as Conrad yanked off the top to Wolfram's uniform, a highly perturbed expression on his face.
Wolfram looked equally unsettled. "Weller! What kind of sick fantasy are you having? I'm your brother!" He shrieked, throwing his leg over Conrad's hip and wrapping an arm around the brown-haired man's neck as he leaned back and awaited his brother's tender caresses. "Tender caresses?!"
Gwendal stood to the side, jaw on the floor and eyes nearly popping out of the older man's head.
Wolfram reached behind him and pulled out a monkey. He could only stare at the animal in his hands in horror. "What kind of depraved--"
Yuuri burst into the room, heaving in an effort to regain his breath. He took one look at his fiance and his godfather, took note of their passionate embrace and the monkey, and fumed. "What the hell is this? Wolfram! Aren't you the one always calling me a cheater?"
"I'm not doing this!" Wolfram caterwauled, trying to shove a freshly lubed monkey in Conrad's pants while the older man riverdanced. "What kind of animal is this, anyway?!"
Gwendal's self-control finally snapped, and he roared angrily, "Wolfram! Wait for both of Conrad's feet to touch the floor and then rip his pants off!" He reeled back, as that was obviously not what he'd intended to say.
At that moment, Murata came flying into the room and began what appeared to be a trance-like dance in nothing but a thong and his glasses, which were flashing wildly. Unlike the rest of them, however, he appeared to be perfectly at ease with his current lack of self-control.
"Murata!" Yuuri squeaked.
"Just go with it, Shibuya!" Murata crowed, planting both feet firmly on the floor and gyrating his hips. "This is obviously the work of a fanfic author!"
"Fan--?!" Wolfram made another mad dodge for Conrad's crotch, determined to catch the man. "Stay still! I'm going to bend you over the desk and fuck you until you can't move!" Everyone in the room paled, but none so much as Conrad.
"Wolfram!" Yuuri jumped back, intending on asking Wolfram how he had deduced that he would be topping Conrad, but instead his mouth formed a different set of words, "How dare you cheat on me with your brother?! As your king, I command you both to have a threesome with me right now!"
"Cheater!" Wolfram sputtered, even as he and Conrad, who had finally stopped dancing, advanced on the boy. Yuuri squawked.
"I didn't mean that!" Conrad and Wolfram were chasing him around the room. "Murata! How do we stop this?! I want to have sex with Wolfram and Conrad gently!" He clapped his hands over his mouth. "Ahhh!"
"You'll have to wait until the author is bored." Murata shimmied, limboing under the desk as Gwendal sang the opening to the Love Boat in choppy Engrish.
"No! How do we stop this before I'm sodomized?!"
Wolfram managed to grab Yuuri's leg as they rounded the table for the forth time. "You idiot! How dare you insinuate--" his ground his teeth, fighting whatever it was he was about to say. He failed, and the words spewed out of him like vomit onto a freshly cleaned carpet, "THAT WHILE WE MAKE TENDER LOVE, I WOULDN'T BE BOTTOM?"
Annissina tittered, eye pressed firmly against the viewer of a video camera. "Why am I here? What is this thing in my hands?" She mused.
Thirty minutes later, Shinou finally dropped the quill by his side. He knew that within an hour, the Great Sage would be paying him a visit, but for once he didn't care if the dark-haired boy lectured him.
After four thousand years of unending boredom, it was worth it.
Edit: For extra lulz, this is the dance I imagined Murata doing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-Uc3W0HyxE&feature=related
Author: michechu
Rating: R
Pairings: WolfCon, YuuWolfCon.
Warnings: Possibly some spoilers from season one. Incest, HINTED bestiality, sexual themes, and riverdancing. In a good way.
Summary: Shameless crackfic.
The air was crisp with the scent of morning dew and carried with it a cool breeze. Inside Covenant Castle, three brothers stood over a hulking mass of documents.
They had argued for over an hour about the circumstances of heresy in a neighboring village. It was a trivial dispute that had not called for national crisis nor had it required even the presence of their king.
No one suspected any foul play in the least.
"What do you mean, 'no one suspected any foul play'? It's a soldier's duty to be prepared for the worst!"
Wolfram's comment was deleted.
"Deleted?!"
Delete, delete, delete. Wolfram knew that if he said anything out of line, he would pay for it.
"How dare you!"
Conrad took a step towards his younger brother, grabbing him by the shoulders and leaning in until he was almost nose-to-nose with the blonde. "Wolfram, I think it's time that you and I get re-acquianted." There was a disturbing rip as Conrad yanked off the top to Wolfram's uniform, a highly perturbed expression on his face.
Wolfram looked equally unsettled. "Weller! What kind of sick fantasy are you having? I'm your brother!" He shrieked, throwing his leg over Conrad's hip and wrapping an arm around the brown-haired man's neck as he leaned back and awaited his brother's tender caresses. "Tender caresses?!"
Gwendal stood to the side, jaw on the floor and eyes nearly popping out of the older man's head.
Wolfram reached behind him and pulled out a monkey. He could only stare at the animal in his hands in horror. "What kind of depraved--"
Yuuri burst into the room, heaving in an effort to regain his breath. He took one look at his fiance and his godfather, took note of their passionate embrace and the monkey, and fumed. "What the hell is this? Wolfram! Aren't you the one always calling me a cheater?"
"I'm not doing this!" Wolfram caterwauled, trying to shove a freshly lubed monkey in Conrad's pants while the older man riverdanced. "What kind of animal is this, anyway?!"
Gwendal's self-control finally snapped, and he roared angrily, "Wolfram! Wait for both of Conrad's feet to touch the floor and then rip his pants off!" He reeled back, as that was obviously not what he'd intended to say.
At that moment, Murata came flying into the room and began what appeared to be a trance-like dance in nothing but a thong and his glasses, which were flashing wildly. Unlike the rest of them, however, he appeared to be perfectly at ease with his current lack of self-control.
"Murata!" Yuuri squeaked.
"Just go with it, Shibuya!" Murata crowed, planting both feet firmly on the floor and gyrating his hips. "This is obviously the work of a fanfic author!"
"Fan--?!" Wolfram made another mad dodge for Conrad's crotch, determined to catch the man. "Stay still! I'm going to bend you over the desk and fuck you until you can't move!" Everyone in the room paled, but none so much as Conrad.
"Wolfram!" Yuuri jumped back, intending on asking Wolfram how he had deduced that he would be topping Conrad, but instead his mouth formed a different set of words, "How dare you cheat on me with your brother?! As your king, I command you both to have a threesome with me right now!"
"Cheater!" Wolfram sputtered, even as he and Conrad, who had finally stopped dancing, advanced on the boy. Yuuri squawked.
"I didn't mean that!" Conrad and Wolfram were chasing him around the room. "Murata! How do we stop this?! I want to have sex with Wolfram and Conrad gently!" He clapped his hands over his mouth. "Ahhh!"
"You'll have to wait until the author is bored." Murata shimmied, limboing under the desk as Gwendal sang the opening to the Love Boat in choppy Engrish.
"No! How do we stop this before I'm sodomized?!"
Wolfram managed to grab Yuuri's leg as they rounded the table for the forth time. "You idiot! How dare you insinuate--" his ground his teeth, fighting whatever it was he was about to say. He failed, and the words spewed out of him like vomit onto a freshly cleaned carpet, "THAT WHILE WE MAKE TENDER LOVE, I WOULDN'T BE BOTTOM?"
Annissina tittered, eye pressed firmly against the viewer of a video camera. "Why am I here? What is this thing in my hands?" She mused.
Thirty minutes later, Shinou finally dropped the quill by his side. He knew that within an hour, the Great Sage would be paying him a visit, but for once he didn't care if the dark-haired boy lectured him.
After four thousand years of unending boredom, it was worth it.
Edit: For extra lulz, this is the dance I imagined Murata doing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-Uc3W0HyxE&feature=related