Man of Steel review. Alternate title: I complain a lot about tornado scenes.
My mother and I saw Man of Steel this weekend. I wanted to like this movie, I really did. :(
I loved the first 25-30 minutes, which takes place on Krypton and gives some backstory on the world and Kal-el's parents.
It did have an unintentionally hilarious birth scene, but the birth scene was slightly justified in retrospect. (They still could have pulled it off better, but whatever. Hollywood's birth scenes always come across as "so much overacting that it's funny" to me.)
After coming out of the theater, my first reaction was "why couldn't the entire movie have been a Superman prequel set on Krypton that expanded on the first 30 minutes? I would pay money to see that movie. In fact, I would pay money to OWN that movie!" You have: a planet that is basically in an apocalyptic scenario (which was brought on by the inhabitants), cool alien weapons and technology, awesome flying reptiles, a likeable main character in Superman's father (though I admit my Russell Crowe bias may be showing), some "destiny vs free will" conflict, the government and the military on the brink of what could be a civil war, best friends who become enemies... the list goes on and on. Maybe said movie would have been slightly unoriginal, but it sure would have been fun!
The last 2 hours of Man of Steel, unfortunately, were hugely disappointing. Some minor complaints in no particular order:
- The flashbacks to Clark's past didn't always work. Sometimes it was obvious that a flashback was happening (during his childhood, for instance), but even then, the cuts to the flashbacks seemed jumpy. Once Clark became an adult, it was harder to tell what was a flashback and what was happening in real time. I should not have to spend 30 seconds trying to figure out if a scene is a flashback or not.
- Lois Lane is an idiot with a death wish. Seriously, Lois, stop running TOWARDS trouble. I understand that she's a reporter, but she needs at least a little bit of a survival instinct.
- Clark Kent is sympathetic as a kid but highly unlikeable as a teen/adult. More on this later.
- Superman needs to learn what the phrase "collateral damage" means. For the last hour of the movie, all I could think was "Wow, Superman, you fail at your job. Someone call the Avengers instead; at least they attempted to minimize the civilian casualties and property damage."
- So many plot holes and things that weren't technically plot holes, but were also left intentionally vague. For instance, we are told that Lois learns the secret to defeating the bad guys, and she tells Superman "I know their weakness!"... but the audience is never told what that weakness is. And then Superman suddenly defeats the bad guys after 30 minutes of fighting, despite the fact that (to the audience's eyes) he has not changed his strategy at all.
The movie also had the most infuriating and unrealistic tornado scene I've ever seen. You know how some people have specific things they can't tolerate science/fact-fail on? Tornadoes are mine.
Problem #1: They were presumably in Kansas when the tornado formed. Why weren't the sirens going off?! This took place in 1997, not the 1800s. My mother lived in various parts of Kansas for most of her childhood. She can attest that Kansas has had a good tornado warning system since at least the 1960s.
Problem #2: Don't even get me started on the 30-60 seconds when Clark's dad is stuck in the car, because it is filled with stupid. He should have died several times during that scene, but his only injury is a broken foot/ankle. How?!
Problem #3: if the tornado is that close, there is no way Clark's dad would be able to stand up after getting out of the car. The wind would be too strong, and this is not even taking into account that he has a BROKEN FOOT. Clark gets a pass because he's Superman, but all the human characters in that scene should be holding onto something for dear life and/or laying flat against the ground if they don't want to get sucked away by the tornado.
Problem #4: "get under the overpass!" is pretty much the worst tornado advice, short of staying in your car. I can't excuse Hollywood for sticking terrible tornado safety advice in a film this big, not when following that advice could potentially get someone killed (and has gotten people killed in the past). For the record: yes, I know that people shouldn't look to movies for tornado safety tips. However, considering that the "getting under an overpass will protect you" advice was a widely-held belief throughout the 90's and early 2000's, and that meteorologists are STILL having to tell people "no, that's terrible advice; don't ever do that", I think my annoyance is justified.
Problem #5: Clark's choice to watch his father die in the tornado instead of trying to save him made me irrationally angry. I've never been directly affected by a tornado, but I know/knew people who had their houses destroyed by tornadoes and were lucky to survive. I drive through the tornado-damaged areas of my town several times per week because the only way to head south is to drive through those areas. It's been more than a month since the F5 tornado hit, but there is still debris everywhere. Forget about rebuilding; it's going to take months just to clear the debris out. There are half-mile stretches of road that used to be lined with houses, and now there is literally nothing left standing, just debris as far as the eye can see. It's surreal. I barely recognize my own town anymore. After seeing the extent of the damage in person, I'm amazed that the casualties weren't higher.
I guess what I'm saying is: "if that kind of destruction is headed towards your family and you have the power to save them, WHY WOULDN'T YOU SAVE THEM?!" If you're going to play the "Clark Kent couldn't save his father and had to watch him die" card, make his father die from something that Superman literally COULD NOT have saved him from. Because right now, Clark Kent chooses not to save his father in order to protect his own secret, and it kind of makes me hate him.
I'm not saying that they should have changed the tornado scene in Man of Steel because of the recent tornado outbreak; that would be dumb, and there wasn't enough time for them to replace the scene even if they had wanted to. What I AM saying is that the tornado scene, as written in the movie, should have been revised to make it less stupid and rage-inducing.
Want a more realistic tornado scene? How about this: the Kent family is driving on an overcast day when they suddenly spot a tornado headed their way. (The sirens should have been going off by this point, but it's possible that they didn't hear the sirens over the wind. Or maybe the sirens were broken. Or maybe the tornado popped up too quickly, which is rare, but it happens.) They see a building in the distance (gas station, personal property, whatever) and rush there to take shelter. However, when they get there, the designated tornado shelter room only has space for two more adults. Clark thinks he should be the one to stay outside the saferoom since he has the highest chance of survival, but his father says "no"... maybe because he's a dad and that's just what dads do, maybe because he thinks the world isn't ready to know of Clark's powers yet. Jonathan says "don't worry, I'm sure I'll be fine" as he takes shelter in another room.
Jonathan gets killed; maybe he's hit with flying debris, maybe the walls or ceiling collapse on top of him, maybe the tornado rips through the building and sucks him out and the safe room is the only one left standing. Ta-da, more realistic tornado scene without terrible overpass advice, with the added bonus of Clark Kent still feeling guilty for not "saving" his father (ie, giving up his place in the shelter). Clark could even "watch" his father get killed in this scenario because, remember, x-ray vision. That took me an entire 3 minutes to think up. You can do better than me, Hollywood. :/
tl;dr: I'm not angry that they left a tornado scene in. I'm angry that they left a terrible, unrealistic tornado scene in, especially when it makes Clark even less likeable. Also, I hope that anyone who was directly affected by the local May tornadoes and happened to watch Man of Steel knew that the tornado scene was coming.
Overall rating: 5/10. It's pretty, and the first 30 minutes are really fun... but the rest of the film is mediocre. Probably worth a Redbox rental, but don't pay theater ticket price for it.
I loved the first 25-30 minutes, which takes place on Krypton and gives some backstory on the world and Kal-el's parents.
It did have an unintentionally hilarious birth scene, but the birth scene was slightly justified in retrospect. (They still could have pulled it off better, but whatever. Hollywood's birth scenes always come across as "so much overacting that it's funny" to me.)
After coming out of the theater, my first reaction was "why couldn't the entire movie have been a Superman prequel set on Krypton that expanded on the first 30 minutes? I would pay money to see that movie. In fact, I would pay money to OWN that movie!" You have: a planet that is basically in an apocalyptic scenario (which was brought on by the inhabitants), cool alien weapons and technology, awesome flying reptiles, a likeable main character in Superman's father (though I admit my Russell Crowe bias may be showing), some "destiny vs free will" conflict, the government and the military on the brink of what could be a civil war, best friends who become enemies... the list goes on and on. Maybe said movie would have been slightly unoriginal, but it sure would have been fun!
The last 2 hours of Man of Steel, unfortunately, were hugely disappointing. Some minor complaints in no particular order:
- The flashbacks to Clark's past didn't always work. Sometimes it was obvious that a flashback was happening (during his childhood, for instance), but even then, the cuts to the flashbacks seemed jumpy. Once Clark became an adult, it was harder to tell what was a flashback and what was happening in real time. I should not have to spend 30 seconds trying to figure out if a scene is a flashback or not.
- Lois Lane is an idiot with a death wish. Seriously, Lois, stop running TOWARDS trouble. I understand that she's a reporter, but she needs at least a little bit of a survival instinct.
- Clark Kent is sympathetic as a kid but highly unlikeable as a teen/adult. More on this later.
- Superman needs to learn what the phrase "collateral damage" means. For the last hour of the movie, all I could think was "Wow, Superman, you fail at your job. Someone call the Avengers instead; at least they attempted to minimize the civilian casualties and property damage."
- So many plot holes and things that weren't technically plot holes, but were also left intentionally vague. For instance, we are told that Lois learns the secret to defeating the bad guys, and she tells Superman "I know their weakness!"... but the audience is never told what that weakness is. And then Superman suddenly defeats the bad guys after 30 minutes of fighting, despite the fact that (to the audience's eyes) he has not changed his strategy at all.
The movie also had the most infuriating and unrealistic tornado scene I've ever seen. You know how some people have specific things they can't tolerate science/fact-fail on? Tornadoes are mine.
Problem #1: They were presumably in Kansas when the tornado formed. Why weren't the sirens going off?! This took place in 1997, not the 1800s. My mother lived in various parts of Kansas for most of her childhood. She can attest that Kansas has had a good tornado warning system since at least the 1960s.
Problem #2: Don't even get me started on the 30-60 seconds when Clark's dad is stuck in the car, because it is filled with stupid. He should have died several times during that scene, but his only injury is a broken foot/ankle. How?!
Problem #3: if the tornado is that close, there is no way Clark's dad would be able to stand up after getting out of the car. The wind would be too strong, and this is not even taking into account that he has a BROKEN FOOT. Clark gets a pass because he's Superman, but all the human characters in that scene should be holding onto something for dear life and/or laying flat against the ground if they don't want to get sucked away by the tornado.
Problem #4: "get under the overpass!" is pretty much the worst tornado advice, short of staying in your car. I can't excuse Hollywood for sticking terrible tornado safety advice in a film this big, not when following that advice could potentially get someone killed (and has gotten people killed in the past). For the record: yes, I know that people shouldn't look to movies for tornado safety tips. However, considering that the "getting under an overpass will protect you" advice was a widely-held belief throughout the 90's and early 2000's, and that meteorologists are STILL having to tell people "no, that's terrible advice; don't ever do that", I think my annoyance is justified.
Problem #5: Clark's choice to watch his father die in the tornado instead of trying to save him made me irrationally angry. I've never been directly affected by a tornado, but I know/knew people who had their houses destroyed by tornadoes and were lucky to survive. I drive through the tornado-damaged areas of my town several times per week because the only way to head south is to drive through those areas. It's been more than a month since the F5 tornado hit, but there is still debris everywhere. Forget about rebuilding; it's going to take months just to clear the debris out. There are half-mile stretches of road that used to be lined with houses, and now there is literally nothing left standing, just debris as far as the eye can see. It's surreal. I barely recognize my own town anymore. After seeing the extent of the damage in person, I'm amazed that the casualties weren't higher.
I guess what I'm saying is: "if that kind of destruction is headed towards your family and you have the power to save them, WHY WOULDN'T YOU SAVE THEM?!" If you're going to play the "Clark Kent couldn't save his father and had to watch him die" card, make his father die from something that Superman literally COULD NOT have saved him from. Because right now, Clark Kent chooses not to save his father in order to protect his own secret, and it kind of makes me hate him.
I'm not saying that they should have changed the tornado scene in Man of Steel because of the recent tornado outbreak; that would be dumb, and there wasn't enough time for them to replace the scene even if they had wanted to. What I AM saying is that the tornado scene, as written in the movie, should have been revised to make it less stupid and rage-inducing.
Want a more realistic tornado scene? How about this: the Kent family is driving on an overcast day when they suddenly spot a tornado headed their way. (The sirens should have been going off by this point, but it's possible that they didn't hear the sirens over the wind. Or maybe the sirens were broken. Or maybe the tornado popped up too quickly, which is rare, but it happens.) They see a building in the distance (gas station, personal property, whatever) and rush there to take shelter. However, when they get there, the designated tornado shelter room only has space for two more adults. Clark thinks he should be the one to stay outside the saferoom since he has the highest chance of survival, but his father says "no"... maybe because he's a dad and that's just what dads do, maybe because he thinks the world isn't ready to know of Clark's powers yet. Jonathan says "don't worry, I'm sure I'll be fine" as he takes shelter in another room.
Jonathan gets killed; maybe he's hit with flying debris, maybe the walls or ceiling collapse on top of him, maybe the tornado rips through the building and sucks him out and the safe room is the only one left standing. Ta-da, more realistic tornado scene without terrible overpass advice, with the added bonus of Clark Kent still feeling guilty for not "saving" his father (ie, giving up his place in the shelter). Clark could even "watch" his father get killed in this scenario because, remember, x-ray vision. That took me an entire 3 minutes to think up. You can do better than me, Hollywood. :/
tl;dr: I'm not angry that they left a tornado scene in. I'm angry that they left a terrible, unrealistic tornado scene in, especially when it makes Clark even less likeable. Also, I hope that anyone who was directly affected by the local May tornadoes and happened to watch Man of Steel knew that the tornado scene was coming.
Overall rating: 5/10. It's pretty, and the first 30 minutes are really fun... but the rest of the film is mediocre. Probably worth a Redbox rental, but don't pay theater ticket price for it.