Been a long, long time
It's been a long time since I've been here.
Not sure whether that's a good thing or a bad thing? Whenever I do come, I always find myself reading through old entries and they're nothing but depression. I'm glad they're there but it makes it so hard to stay here for long and then all the impetus of posting is gone before it even started.
Last week was the first time in a year or more that I wrote anything. It was just three sentences added into a story I started a long, long time ago but it felt incredible. I realized, it's time to get back to that self.
I'm not sure how I'm going to do it but I need to incorporate writing back into my week. My work spends 40+ hours a week killing me and I've become "comfortably numb" to it.
Today, I decided to spend my afternoon getting high and watching Pink Floyd's The Wall. So I pull out my old DVD and pop it into the blu ray player, only to discover it's like the smallest image ever created on my big (fucking big in comparison) TV. So naturally, my high brain immediately wanted to go to the store to buy the Blu ray version. Well, I guess it doesn't exsist here in Canada? Or potentially anywhere? But as much of a waste as that trip out was, it was fucking surreal to go to the mall high, especially that mall. I went to Lansdowne, which is like the most depressed mall of all malls and is the epitome of suburban hell while you're in it. Strange, it's in the middle of a vibrant city, but the second you step inside you're transported to bad 80's hair and overwieght people that are clearly struggling with so much on their minds-- debt, cheating spouses, stupid kids-- the only way each one of 'em can cope is to go buy some shit at some really fucking tacky, shitty stores.
I wasn't the only one in that mall that was high. I was just the only one being honest about.
Not sure whether that's a good thing or a bad thing? Whenever I do come, I always find myself reading through old entries and they're nothing but depression. I'm glad they're there but it makes it so hard to stay here for long and then all the impetus of posting is gone before it even started.
Last week was the first time in a year or more that I wrote anything. It was just three sentences added into a story I started a long, long time ago but it felt incredible. I realized, it's time to get back to that self.
I'm not sure how I'm going to do it but I need to incorporate writing back into my week. My work spends 40+ hours a week killing me and I've become "comfortably numb" to it.
Today, I decided to spend my afternoon getting high and watching Pink Floyd's The Wall. So I pull out my old DVD and pop it into the blu ray player, only to discover it's like the smallest image ever created on my big (fucking big in comparison) TV. So naturally, my high brain immediately wanted to go to the store to buy the Blu ray version. Well, I guess it doesn't exsist here in Canada? Or potentially anywhere? But as much of a waste as that trip out was, it was fucking surreal to go to the mall high, especially that mall. I went to Lansdowne, which is like the most depressed mall of all malls and is the epitome of suburban hell while you're in it. Strange, it's in the middle of a vibrant city, but the second you step inside you're transported to bad 80's hair and overwieght people that are clearly struggling with so much on their minds-- debt, cheating spouses, stupid kids-- the only way each one of 'em can cope is to go buy some shit at some really fucking tacky, shitty stores.
I wasn't the only one in that mall that was high. I was just the only one being honest about.