(no subject)
Somehow I am upset that life hasn't stopped for him since my assertion. Knowing that he must find another, that I cannot be "the one" for him, I still hope, assume, that he will still be pining for me. But why? Why should he be lusting for me when there was no spark to begin with? Maybe I'm just hoping that someone, anyone aside from the one that does, will love me, or even have a glimmer of lust for me. Without lustful companions, one feels useless, unlovable, and unable to have love for the ones who truely deserve it. Maybe I'm just wishing for the days in high school when random guys would walk up to me and ask me out, and unfortunately the random guys who would stalk me (and still do).
Soon enough. I'm making progress, but not fast enough. Sometimes I still find myself exercising 3 and 4 times a day. I've calculated that on average in high school I would work out for 6 hours a day: 1 1/2 in the morning,3 at soccer practice, and 1 1/2 at night.
Soon enough. I'm making progress, but not fast enough. Sometimes I still find myself exercising 3 and 4 times a day. I've calculated that on average in high school I would work out for 6 hours a day: 1 1/2 in the morning,3 at soccer practice, and 1 1/2 at night.