[fanfic] burnt bridges
Title: burnt bridges
Fandom: Pokémon
Summary: Because there are some bridges you don't know you've crossed until you already have.
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Friendship, Angst, Character Study.
Warnings: language, light violence.
burnt bridges
When he wins, Red cannot determine why he even went through all the trouble.
- . . . -
The League says that now that he is Champion, he is responsible for keeping Kanto safe.
At first, Red takes his job seriously. He travels to the Sevii Islands after hearing rumors that some Team Rocket stragglers were causing trouble there. He half expects Giovanni to have broken his oath and rallied them again, but all he finds are a couple of grunts playing at a half-baked scheme.
It's over before it started, really. All it takes is a single flash of lightning from Pikachu and each of their pokémon faint.
After they swear revenge and run away, Red simply stands in the ruins of the hideout, wondering if that was really all there was to it.
- . . . -
He battles Leaf every Thursday. These days, she is the only one who can actually put up a challenge.
The last time they battled, Leaf had managed to knock out both Lapras and Venasaur, but Charizard is able to finish off her last pokémon, already weakened from taking a hit from Venasaur's Frenzy Plant.
Red recalls Charizard and watches as Leaf cradles her Ditto, cooing a little to it before recalling it herself. Sighing, Leaf adjusts the brim of her hat and kicks at the dirt aimlessly. "Well," she drawls, "that's another win for you, oh great Champion."
He says nothing. Then again, he rarely does, and Leaf has known him long enough to know that she shouldn't expect any replies from him. She flops down dramatically on the grass and motions for Red to do the same. He does.
They sit in silence for a while. From where they are, they can see the sunset over Vermillion Harbor and the way the ocean turns countless shades of red, orange and everything in between. He remembers the first time he arrived at Vermillion City, eager to defeat Surge. He remembers the disappointment at seeing the name Green emblazoned of the Certified Trainers list. The fact that Leaf had come rushing in to challenge the gym herself the moment Pikachu managed to overpower Surge's evolved Raichu was only a minor consolation.
"I'm leaving," Leaf says airily, breaking the comfortable silence. Red looks at her in surprise. "Kanto's too small, you know? Besides, there's no hope for Pallet's third best trainer to take the Championship when she's got the first and second to contend with, right?"
Red says nothing, but Pikachu does. He jumps off Red's shoulder and crawls into Leaf's lap, mewling a little, a sad expression on his face. Leaf smiles sadly and rubs Pikachu behind the ears absentmindedly.
"I'm thinking Hoenn, but then again, Sinnoh's nice. I've never seen snow before, and I hear that there's this northern city that's colder than Articuno's nest in the Seafoam Islands..."
Leaf keeps talking. She expresses her desire to catch a ralts, her memories about visiting Olivine City once as a child and how she'd always wanted to return to Johto. And then she says, "You should come with me, Red," he is acutely aware of pink tinge of her cheeks, "Remember when we were kids we'd always imagine that we were exploring different regions? You, me and Green... we promised we'd explore them all together..."
Red stays quiet, but he has stopped listening.
For a moment, he allows himself to imagine what it would be like to explore the other regions. He thinks of the exotic pokémon he could catch, the trainers he could battle... but mostly he thinks of a journey with Leaf and the places they'd go together.
The three of them.
But then Red frowns and remembers the way it really is. How Green won't talk to him anymore, how Green won't even look at him.
Red swallows the lump in his throat. Dreams like that don't ever come true.
- . . . -
Leaf leaves for Sinnoh the following Wednesday.
Red misses her, but he can't help but think that what he misses most isn't her penchant for holding one-sided conversations with him, or the odd, charming way she carries herself.
Without her, who will he battle?
- . . . -
He had been looking for an excuse to visit Green for a while, but his inauguration as Viridian City Gym Leader is too convenient to pass up.
It's been a year since their battle at the Indigo Plateau, and Red is surprised at how different Green is. The older boy doesn't scowl at him, nor does he throw barbed insults at him. There is no resentment in Green's eyes, and though Red should be relieved (because it has been years since Green has looked at him without any sort of resentment), he's a little scared instead.
Because when Green looks at him, there's nothing in his eyes.
"Red," Green says when the Champion shows up at his apartment, "Come in."
Red enters and stands awkwardly in the living room. Pikachu jumps down from his shoulder and greets Eevee, who receives him happily. The two run off into what Red assumes is the kitchen, leaving him alone with Green.
Green seems even more awkward than Red feels, but he attempts some small talk. "What brings you here? Oh, right... I'll just have to guess..."
Before Red knows it, they are sitting at Green's small dinner table drinking coffee. Red stares at Green while the new Gym Leader alternates between stirring his coffee and making small comments. By their feet, Pikachu and Eevee play.
"So Leaf went to Sinnoh, huh?" Green asks idly before taking a sip of coffee.
"I'm better than you."
Pikachu and Eevee stop playing at Red's words, and the silence is deafening. Green's eyes have narrowed a bit. Red is smirking. "That doesn't matter anymore," Green mutters.
"Sure it doesn't," Red replies, voice so low it's almost inaudible in the small apartment, "Just like it didn't matter when I beat you two hours after your win against Lance-"
"Red," Green whispers, hands tightening into fists.
"And by the time Professor Oak got there-"
Green is shaking now. "Shut up."
"I'd already beaten you, and instead of congratulating you he ended up telling you off- "
Red topples over in his chair and onto the floor with the force of Green's punch. Pikachu and Eevee cry out as Green straddles the fallen boy, making a fist at the collar of his vest.
"Wanna say that again, fucker?" Green yells.
The Champion's lip is bloody, split from his former rival's punch. Green's face is wild, teeth bared and skin white with fury. Red is still smirking, crimson-tinted eyes staring right into Green's flashing olive ones, happy that Green is finally looking at him again.
- . . . -
They end up having a pokémon battle, just like old times.
Viridian Gym had been remodeled since Giovanni's departure, Red notices. It fits Green, somehow.
That scares Red even more.
Green puts up a better fight than Leaf ever could. Arcanine manages to take out Charizard and weaken Blastoise enough that when Exeggutor switches in, Blastoise is easily taken out. Lapras manages to knock Exeggutor out with an ice beam, but Pidgeot holds its own against Lapras and Snorlax but is knocked out by Venasaur. Surprisingly, Alakazam and Venasaur end up knocking each other out, and just like that, they're down to their last pokémon.
Their starters. Red just smirks-the irony isn't lost on him.
Green is breathing hard when Eevee steps into the ring, facing Pikachu down, teeth bared. Green barks an order and Eevee executes it flawlessly, but Red doesn't have to speak. Pikachu moves quickly and dodges the attack, unleashing a thuderbolt that Eevee just barely dodges.
The battle carries on like this for a while-Pikachu effortlessly avoids all of Eevee's attempts at a counterattack and fires lightning at her every few seconds. Red can see that Green and Eevee are tiring out. With each of Pikachu's attacks, Eevee's escapes get more and more narrow. When the lightning hits close enough to send Eevee skidding across the floor, fur singed, Red knows that he's won.
He pulls at his hat and Pikachu charges, executing the new move that they'd recently perfected. The volt tackle hits Eevee head-on, and it's over.
Green falls to his knees beside Eevee and hugs her to him tenderly. Red remembers the last time this happened-the Championship match. Except that time, Green had just stayed down, staring off at nothing in shock.
This time, he gets back up, looks Red square in the eye and says: "Are you happy now?"
And of all the questions Green could possibly have asked, that is the one that Red cannot answer. Because despite the fact that Red is the Champion, and that all his dreams have come true, he still isn't happy. Still hasn't gotten what he wanted.
Red just pulls down the brim of his cap and walks out of the gym, leaving Green alone.
Where he belongs.
- . . . -
The only sound Red can hear on Mt. Silver is the howl of the harsh winds.
After his battle with Green, Red had flown to the Indigo Plateau and resigned. Lance is Champion now, and despite that the League had protested strongly against making a single man champion of two regions, Red had left them with no choice.
Red likes to imagine that Mt. Silver is the place he belongs. After a while, he even comes to believe it. The mountain is his kingdom, and that's alright too. He enjoys the cold, the solitude, the challenging training opportunities that only wild pokémon can provide...
Yet sometimes he can't help thinking about them. He wonders how Leaf is doing, wonders if she's managed to conquer Sinnoh yet. He thinks about Green, too... because deep down, Red knows that he'd stolen the gym leader's dreams when he became Champion.
The idea of becoming the greatest trainer wasn't his own. It had been Green's. When they were children, it was all Green would talk about. Leaf had bought into the battling because of the adventure that came with it, but Red... Red had never cared much about it at all.
Until Green stopped talking to him and started being mean to him, and the only way Red could get Green to look at him was to challenge the other boy at every turn. The battles were just an extension of the schoolyard fights and the races down the field, except that Red is so much better Green can't keep up, and before he knows it, he's better than everyone out there.
By becoming Champion, Red had hoped to fulfill his dreams. Green would have to acknowledge him now. But Green has moved on-he's become a gym leader and settled down and stopped trying to catch up to Red and Leaf has gone to explore the world without them and... and...
Sometimes it gets too hard to think.
Red hates his kingdom for that.
- . . . -
The trainers started showing up a year after he climbed the mountain. When the reach him at its zenith, they can only stare with wide eyes filled with awe, like he was some sort of god or hero, or something.
Red battles them all. He beats them all too. When they fall to their knees in defeat and stare off into the distance in shock, he offers them a silent "you're welcome" for denying them their dreams.
A dream-come-true just leaves behind empty spaces, after all. It's better that they never have to learn that the hard way.
- . . . -
The challenger can't be older than ten.
It's been a while since he's faced one that young.
The way he has a typhlosion following him around reminds Red of himself and Pikachu back then. He frowns and tugs the brim of his hat down to hide his expression from the boy's golden eyes.
Five minutes, Red predicts. Five minutes and the boy will be defeated just like all the others.
Just a few minutes, and Red can get back to waiting for Leaf and Green to come find him...
- . . . -
And all the king's horses and all the king's men, couldn't put him together again.
Fandom: Pokémon
Summary: Because there are some bridges you don't know you've crossed until you already have.
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Friendship, Angst, Character Study.
Warnings: language, light violence.
burnt bridges
When he wins, Red cannot determine why he even went through all the trouble.
- . . . -
The League says that now that he is Champion, he is responsible for keeping Kanto safe.
At first, Red takes his job seriously. He travels to the Sevii Islands after hearing rumors that some Team Rocket stragglers were causing trouble there. He half expects Giovanni to have broken his oath and rallied them again, but all he finds are a couple of grunts playing at a half-baked scheme.
It's over before it started, really. All it takes is a single flash of lightning from Pikachu and each of their pokémon faint.
After they swear revenge and run away, Red simply stands in the ruins of the hideout, wondering if that was really all there was to it.
- . . . -
He battles Leaf every Thursday. These days, she is the only one who can actually put up a challenge.
The last time they battled, Leaf had managed to knock out both Lapras and Venasaur, but Charizard is able to finish off her last pokémon, already weakened from taking a hit from Venasaur's Frenzy Plant.
Red recalls Charizard and watches as Leaf cradles her Ditto, cooing a little to it before recalling it herself. Sighing, Leaf adjusts the brim of her hat and kicks at the dirt aimlessly. "Well," she drawls, "that's another win for you, oh great Champion."
He says nothing. Then again, he rarely does, and Leaf has known him long enough to know that she shouldn't expect any replies from him. She flops down dramatically on the grass and motions for Red to do the same. He does.
They sit in silence for a while. From where they are, they can see the sunset over Vermillion Harbor and the way the ocean turns countless shades of red, orange and everything in between. He remembers the first time he arrived at Vermillion City, eager to defeat Surge. He remembers the disappointment at seeing the name Green emblazoned of the Certified Trainers list. The fact that Leaf had come rushing in to challenge the gym herself the moment Pikachu managed to overpower Surge's evolved Raichu was only a minor consolation.
"I'm leaving," Leaf says airily, breaking the comfortable silence. Red looks at her in surprise. "Kanto's too small, you know? Besides, there's no hope for Pallet's third best trainer to take the Championship when she's got the first and second to contend with, right?"
Red says nothing, but Pikachu does. He jumps off Red's shoulder and crawls into Leaf's lap, mewling a little, a sad expression on his face. Leaf smiles sadly and rubs Pikachu behind the ears absentmindedly.
"I'm thinking Hoenn, but then again, Sinnoh's nice. I've never seen snow before, and I hear that there's this northern city that's colder than Articuno's nest in the Seafoam Islands..."
Leaf keeps talking. She expresses her desire to catch a ralts, her memories about visiting Olivine City once as a child and how she'd always wanted to return to Johto. And then she says, "You should come with me, Red," he is acutely aware of pink tinge of her cheeks, "Remember when we were kids we'd always imagine that we were exploring different regions? You, me and Green... we promised we'd explore them all together..."
Red stays quiet, but he has stopped listening.
For a moment, he allows himself to imagine what it would be like to explore the other regions. He thinks of the exotic pokémon he could catch, the trainers he could battle... but mostly he thinks of a journey with Leaf and the places they'd go together.
The three of them.
But then Red frowns and remembers the way it really is. How Green won't talk to him anymore, how Green won't even look at him.
Red swallows the lump in his throat. Dreams like that don't ever come true.
- . . . -
Leaf leaves for Sinnoh the following Wednesday.
Red misses her, but he can't help but think that what he misses most isn't her penchant for holding one-sided conversations with him, or the odd, charming way she carries herself.
Without her, who will he battle?
- . . . -
He had been looking for an excuse to visit Green for a while, but his inauguration as Viridian City Gym Leader is too convenient to pass up.
It's been a year since their battle at the Indigo Plateau, and Red is surprised at how different Green is. The older boy doesn't scowl at him, nor does he throw barbed insults at him. There is no resentment in Green's eyes, and though Red should be relieved (because it has been years since Green has looked at him without any sort of resentment), he's a little scared instead.
Because when Green looks at him, there's nothing in his eyes.
"Red," Green says when the Champion shows up at his apartment, "Come in."
Red enters and stands awkwardly in the living room. Pikachu jumps down from his shoulder and greets Eevee, who receives him happily. The two run off into what Red assumes is the kitchen, leaving him alone with Green.
Green seems even more awkward than Red feels, but he attempts some small talk. "What brings you here? Oh, right... I'll just have to guess..."
Before Red knows it, they are sitting at Green's small dinner table drinking coffee. Red stares at Green while the new Gym Leader alternates between stirring his coffee and making small comments. By their feet, Pikachu and Eevee play.
"So Leaf went to Sinnoh, huh?" Green asks idly before taking a sip of coffee.
"I'm better than you."
Pikachu and Eevee stop playing at Red's words, and the silence is deafening. Green's eyes have narrowed a bit. Red is smirking. "That doesn't matter anymore," Green mutters.
"Sure it doesn't," Red replies, voice so low it's almost inaudible in the small apartment, "Just like it didn't matter when I beat you two hours after your win against Lance-"
"Red," Green whispers, hands tightening into fists.
"And by the time Professor Oak got there-"
Green is shaking now. "Shut up."
"I'd already beaten you, and instead of congratulating you he ended up telling you off- "
Red topples over in his chair and onto the floor with the force of Green's punch. Pikachu and Eevee cry out as Green straddles the fallen boy, making a fist at the collar of his vest.
"Wanna say that again, fucker?" Green yells.
The Champion's lip is bloody, split from his former rival's punch. Green's face is wild, teeth bared and skin white with fury. Red is still smirking, crimson-tinted eyes staring right into Green's flashing olive ones, happy that Green is finally looking at him again.
- . . . -
They end up having a pokémon battle, just like old times.
Viridian Gym had been remodeled since Giovanni's departure, Red notices. It fits Green, somehow.
That scares Red even more.
Green puts up a better fight than Leaf ever could. Arcanine manages to take out Charizard and weaken Blastoise enough that when Exeggutor switches in, Blastoise is easily taken out. Lapras manages to knock Exeggutor out with an ice beam, but Pidgeot holds its own against Lapras and Snorlax but is knocked out by Venasaur. Surprisingly, Alakazam and Venasaur end up knocking each other out, and just like that, they're down to their last pokémon.
Their starters. Red just smirks-the irony isn't lost on him.
Green is breathing hard when Eevee steps into the ring, facing Pikachu down, teeth bared. Green barks an order and Eevee executes it flawlessly, but Red doesn't have to speak. Pikachu moves quickly and dodges the attack, unleashing a thuderbolt that Eevee just barely dodges.
The battle carries on like this for a while-Pikachu effortlessly avoids all of Eevee's attempts at a counterattack and fires lightning at her every few seconds. Red can see that Green and Eevee are tiring out. With each of Pikachu's attacks, Eevee's escapes get more and more narrow. When the lightning hits close enough to send Eevee skidding across the floor, fur singed, Red knows that he's won.
He pulls at his hat and Pikachu charges, executing the new move that they'd recently perfected. The volt tackle hits Eevee head-on, and it's over.
Green falls to his knees beside Eevee and hugs her to him tenderly. Red remembers the last time this happened-the Championship match. Except that time, Green had just stayed down, staring off at nothing in shock.
This time, he gets back up, looks Red square in the eye and says: "Are you happy now?"
And of all the questions Green could possibly have asked, that is the one that Red cannot answer. Because despite the fact that Red is the Champion, and that all his dreams have come true, he still isn't happy. Still hasn't gotten what he wanted.
Red just pulls down the brim of his cap and walks out of the gym, leaving Green alone.
Where he belongs.
- . . . -
The only sound Red can hear on Mt. Silver is the howl of the harsh winds.
After his battle with Green, Red had flown to the Indigo Plateau and resigned. Lance is Champion now, and despite that the League had protested strongly against making a single man champion of two regions, Red had left them with no choice.
Red likes to imagine that Mt. Silver is the place he belongs. After a while, he even comes to believe it. The mountain is his kingdom, and that's alright too. He enjoys the cold, the solitude, the challenging training opportunities that only wild pokémon can provide...
Yet sometimes he can't help thinking about them. He wonders how Leaf is doing, wonders if she's managed to conquer Sinnoh yet. He thinks about Green, too... because deep down, Red knows that he'd stolen the gym leader's dreams when he became Champion.
The idea of becoming the greatest trainer wasn't his own. It had been Green's. When they were children, it was all Green would talk about. Leaf had bought into the battling because of the adventure that came with it, but Red... Red had never cared much about it at all.
Until Green stopped talking to him and started being mean to him, and the only way Red could get Green to look at him was to challenge the other boy at every turn. The battles were just an extension of the schoolyard fights and the races down the field, except that Red is so much better Green can't keep up, and before he knows it, he's better than everyone out there.
By becoming Champion, Red had hoped to fulfill his dreams. Green would have to acknowledge him now. But Green has moved on-he's become a gym leader and settled down and stopped trying to catch up to Red and Leaf has gone to explore the world without them and... and...
Sometimes it gets too hard to think.
Red hates his kingdom for that.
- . . . -
The trainers started showing up a year after he climbed the mountain. When the reach him at its zenith, they can only stare with wide eyes filled with awe, like he was some sort of god or hero, or something.
Red battles them all. He beats them all too. When they fall to their knees in defeat and stare off into the distance in shock, he offers them a silent "you're welcome" for denying them their dreams.
A dream-come-true just leaves behind empty spaces, after all. It's better that they never have to learn that the hard way.
- . . . -
The challenger can't be older than ten.
It's been a while since he's faced one that young.
The way he has a typhlosion following him around reminds Red of himself and Pikachu back then. He frowns and tugs the brim of his hat down to hide his expression from the boy's golden eyes.
Five minutes, Red predicts. Five minutes and the boy will be defeated just like all the others.
Just a few minutes, and Red can get back to waiting for Leaf and Green to come find him...
- . . . -
And all the king's horses and all the king's men, couldn't put him together again.