Fic: I Know What Boys Like (Even The Gay Ones)
Title: I Know What Boys Like (Even The Gay Ones)
Author: lil-miss-chocolate
Rating: NC17
Characters: Lauren/Kurt
Genre: Smut
Warning: Mild dubcon, if you’re very sensitive about it.
Spoilers: Up to S2 E13, Comeback. Anything referenced after that is pure conjecture on my part.
Disclaimer: So, so, so not mine. I think anyone actually connected with Glee would have a fit of hysterics if this was presented to them.
Word Count: ~2,500
Summary: Lauren and Kurt come to an arrangement.
Author Notes: Fill for this this prompt on the kink meme . I havered about posting it here, but then I remembered that I have no shame.
Mods, is there any chance of a 'Kurt&Lauren' tag?
Lauren Zizes looked on at the joyful reunion with a disgruntled expression. While she’d never admit it, she secretly enjoyed being a part of New Directions, where she hadn’t been shunned as she had so often before. And now that the slender youth had returned from his apparently exile to Gayton Academy, or whatever the place was called, she was fairly sure that her efforts, which were admittedly somewhat half-hearted, would now be surplus to requirements and she’d be asked to leave.
Still, that wasn’t the only thing she felt as she gazed over at the pale teen. She couldn’t help it - something in the way he exuded inner confidence despite all the crap the world put him through - she felt that in him she had a kindred spirit, someone who understood just what it felt like to have abuse hurled at you from all sides everywhere you went.
That, combined with his graceful poise and impeccable looks, made him unfairly attractive to her. He was someone who, along with most people in the room, she could dominate physically, but Lauren had a feeling that however hard she might try, she could never overpower him mentally. He was just too strong.
And Lauren admired that. She was turned on by that. So much so that, when they ended up alone in the choir room after everyone else had left (he packing his satchel, she lingering possibly-sort-of-intentionally), she called over to him.
“Hey.”
Kurt turned to her with a slightly puzzled expression. “What? I thought us gleeks were beneath your notice.”
Lauren shrugged. “Just wanted to let you know that I don’t give up easy. This club might be totally pathetic, but I’m not gonna leave until I choose to.”
Kurt’s puzzled look remained, his eyebrows slowly rising in mild surprise. “Why would we want you to leave? This club’s about accepting everyone, no matter what goes on in the rest of the school. That’s most of the reason why I came back.”
Lauren shrugged again. “Just thought I’d let you know that I won’t be going without a fight.”
An amused expression settled itself onto Kurt’s face. “A fight between you and me? I’m sure people would pay money to see me get taken to the floor by the school’s wrestling champion.”
“I’d beat you hand to hand, no contest.” She waved a hand dismissively. “But a battle of wills? I wouldn’t bet on me winning that,” Lauren responded. Hold on, did I just give him a compliment?
Kurt blinked at her dumbly. “Did you just… give me a compliment?” In her own, semi-insulting way, of course.
Lauren jerked her shoulder and tossed her head diffidently. This doesn’t happen! She thought. I don’t get lost for words! Especially not when faced with pale, skinny, strangely attractive gay kids.
“You did, didn’t you? I’ve never heard you say anything nice about anyone else. Ever.” Kurt eyed her speculatively.
Lauren did her best to keep the look of panic from her face. She thought she’d succeeded, but then Kurt spoke again.
“What’s so different about me? You faced down Puck without a problem, and he’s way more intimidating than I am.”
“Puckerman was weak.” Finally, she found something to say.
“He survived juvie.” Kurt wasn’t sure quite why he was defending Puck; the guy had been throwing him in dumpsters for years. But then, he had been told about Puck’s sticking up for him while he was away. Perhaps Kurt did owe him something.
“Only just. If I was in juvie, I’d rule that place within a week.” Back on familiar territory, Lauren regained her confidence.
“I don’t doubt it,” Kurt answered, with a nervous laugh.
With effort, Lauren pulled her usual disdainful expression onto her face. “You would totally be my bitch.”
“Probably.” Kurt was a little confused as to where this conversation was going.
“You don’t sound unhappy at the idea.” There was a questioning inflection in Lauren’s tone.
“Not really. Loath as I am to be anyone’s ‘bitch’, if I was your bitch, at least you’d look out for me. And successfully, too.”
“Damn right I would. If you were my bitch, I’d never let you go.”
A momentary look of panic flashed across Lauren’s features as she realised what she’d said.
“I wouldn’t object to that,” Kurt said softly, almost to himself.
Lauren looked at him, shocked at his response, so he explained, “I get tired of always having to look out for myself all the time.” Kurt’s explanation turned into contemplative musing: “It’d be nice to have someone else looking out for me.”
Lauren kept up her brash mask as well as she could as she said, “You’d have to do something for me in return.”
“Oh, really? What?”
The pair outwardly were utterly confident in themselves, but in reality they were walking tentatively along a knife edge, scared that they would push the other too far in this dangerous line of conversation.
“You’d have to be my bitch.” A small smirk crept carefully onto Lauren’s face as she took a step towards Kurt, but she was mentally preparing herself for Kurt to go pelting from the room at any moment.
Kurt slowly backed up several steps, coming to a halt when he bumped into the piano. He rested his hands on the smooth black surface on either side of him, and took a deep breath before responding, “What would that involve?” He kept his eyes fixed warily on Lauren’s.
“You’d have to let me do whatever I want with you. Don’t be scared; you’re too pretty, in a totally girly way, for me to want to damage. It would be just as good for you as it would for me.”
Kurt wasn’t sure when this had turned from a hypothetical situation in an imaginary juvenile detention centre to a real life proposition, but he had to admit that he was curious. He was gay, true, but he’d overheard enough conversation during football practice to grasp that apparently the less attractive someone was, the better they usually were in bed, because they felt like they had more to make up for. And whilst Lauren wasn’t exactly ugly, she didn’t come under any standard definition of the word ‘beautiful’.
So yeah, he was curious, and wanted to see exactly what Lauren was planning to do. “What do you have in mind?” he asked, trying to sound as bored as possible by the whole situation.
Lauren approached him, slowly, giving him time to run if he wanted. Kurt remained resolutely in place as she raised her hand and ran her forefinger down his red-and-blue check shirt covered chest. She slowed further as her fingertips reached his belt.
Her fingers remained there as they gazed steadily into each other’s eyes.
“Would you let me?” Lauren asked. She didn’t doubt that Kurt would be able to deal with it if he didn’t want it, but for some reason she cared enough about him that she didn’t want to make him go through any more hardship than he had to. She later realised that that was most likely the reason she’d brought up the whole ‘protection’ thing in the first place, but here in the present, she just wanted to be sure that he wanted this as much as she did.
“Yes.” Kurt breathed out the answer.
Instead of Lauren’s hand moving downward, as Kurt expected, she moved it sideways. She slipped her fingers through the buttons of his shirt and pulled it out from where it was carefully tucked into his whiter-than-white skinny jeans. She undid each button, one by one, from the bottom to the top, her eyes savouring the sight of his body being gradually revealed to her. His stomach was flat, his pecs lightly defined. His nipples were pink, and they rapidly hardened upon exposure to the air. She untied his white bow tie, leaving it undone around his neck.
Her hands skimmed up and down Kurt’s torso, revelling in the way his skin reacted to her touch. After a final glance at Kurt’s face, which had an expression of curiosity mixed with something else, possibly arousal, firmly fixed upon it, she bent down, and licked the flat of her tongue across one of his delectable looking nipples.
Kurt gasped, not expecting Lauren to make such a move. There she remained, her hands having come to rest on his hips. Kurt’s shirt and bow tie were still draped inelegantly across his shoulders.
Lauren’s tongue moved rapidly back and forth across his nipple, then she began to lick in a round motion, circling it several times before returning to the long flat strokes. She moved across and did the same to his other nipple. The cool air suddenly reaching his damp nipple made it even more rigid, and his cock twitched as it did so.
Lauren’s right hand had moved back to the front of his torso, and was sliding down his abs, touching skin that grew more and more sensitive as her hand lowered and her tongue worked his nipple.
As Lauren knelt down onto one knee, her lips moved lower and lower until they met her hand, just above Kurt’s belt. As she looked up at Kurt, he couldn’t help but ask her why she was doing this, why she wanted to do this with him of all people.
“Sugarcheeks, I’m a woman, I have needs. And by the feel of things…” she slid her hand lower, over the very definite bulge that had grown in the front of Kurt’s jeans, “You’re a guy, so do you.”
Lauren’s eyes were locked with Kurt’s from her position kneeling on the floor at his feet as she continued. “And that look you’ve got going on with the slender and the graceful and all that crap? Fucking sexy.”
“Really?” The genuine surprise and sincerity in Kurt’s voice caused Lauren to look back up from where she was watching her fingers run up and down the zipper line of Kurt’s pants.
Lauren’s voice was low and husky as her eyes met Kurt’s, “Fuck yes.” In that instant, the mask had vanished. She turned her attention back to Kurt’s crotch, where she quickly unbuckled his jeans, then slid the zip down. Slowly, tortuously slowly, one notch at a time. She could feel the warmth and pressure of his cock against the fabric beneath her hand.
Kurt watched Lauren, hardly able to believe what was happening. He was gay, he should not be so turned on by a girl’s feeling him up! Something in the way her confident mask slipped around him, making her vulnerable, it was something that made her deeply attractive to him. Never mind that her body didn’t turn him on in the slightest, it was her attitude that got him going.
He probably would have gone for it anyway, even if he hadn’t found that spark in her. After all, she was offering to keep him safe in exchange for whatever sexual favours he was happy to perform. He would still have had the power in the relationship. Also, a hand on your cock is a hand on your cock, if one is thinking literally. And he didn’t seem likely to find one anywhere else, especially since Blaine was no longer speaking to him for leaving Dalton.
But then Kurt felt her hand reach inside his black boxer briefs, and all logical thinking flew out of the window.
“Oh, yes…” he whispered as Lauren’s warm fingers wrapped around his now exposed cock (Lauren having gently extricated it from his underwear). She slid her hand carefully, uncertainly, along the length of it, moving up and down with a fairly loose grip.
She faltered after a few strokes. “Not wet enough,” Kurt heard her mutter.
“Doesn’t ma-“ Kurt started to say. He meant it - it didn’t matter that it wasn’t quite how he had pictured, it wasn’t wet and brisk; all that mattered was that the feeling of someone else’s warm hand, anyone’s hand that was not his own, working its way up and down his cock.
He was cut off, however, when Lauren leaned forward and her tongue darted out, licking the underside from his balls to the tip. Kurt gasped again and almost staggered backwards, his entire upper body weight now supported by his arms on either side of him.
Lauren’s left hand rested on Kurt’s hip bone, her right was now underneath, caressing his balls. Her tongue slipped rapidly up and down his cock, working over every possible angle as Kurt groaned deeply in pleasure.
Just when Kurt thought that it couldn’t get any better, her hot, wet, mouth engulfed the tip of his cock. He tried to hold back, call a warning, anything, but the firm swipe of her tongue over his slit sent him tumbling straight over the edge, his come spurting into Lauren’s mouth as he reached his peak.
After a moment of shock, Lauren handled it like a pro, pulling back, pausing, and swallowing. Her tongue emerged again to catch the small white droplets still around her mouth.
She knelt back and looked up at him appraisingly. “Not bad, gay boy. I’ve tasted worse.”
Kurt just gaped at her, bones feeling like jelly as he tried not to collapse onto the floor.
Lauren got to her feet and dusted herself down, looking back at Kurt, who hadn’t moved, when she had done so.
“You’re mine now, bitch. Now pull yourself together and get your sexy, scrawny ass out of here.”
Kurt remained where he was, gasping, shirt open, pants undone, cock out, draped over the grand piano.
“Bitch, I own your ass now. If you want me to look after it, you’d better get your ass moving when I tell you to.”
Kurt pulled himself together, tucking himself back into his jeans (which looked perfectly clean, she didn’t seem to have spilled a drop, though they were white which hid it well) and buttoning up his shirt. He looked at her defiantly as he did so. Kurt Hummel did not do embarrassed.
When Kurt was dressed, he picked up his bag, nodded to Lauren, and left the room, his gait as swishy and proud as usual.
Lauren smiled after him. Together, she and Kurt would rule McKinley. If that meant getting on her knees every once in a while, so be it. If she got to be the only girl to get her hands on that body, she was quite happy. And of course, she would never let Kurt know that he really had the upper hand in the equation. Life was so much more fun with boys at her beck and call.
(The bullies of McKinley soon gave up beating up Kurt when Lauren Zizes came to call each time it happened. They also gave up taunting Lauren when each insult incurred the wrath of Kurt Hummel’s tongue. Little did they know exactly why the pair had suddenly teamed up - and if you’d have told them, they simply wouldn’t have believed you. Kurt and Lauren were happy to leave them in confusion).
Partially inspired by Puckurt’s Give Kurt A Blow Job Campaign
Author: lil-miss-chocolate
Rating: NC17
Characters: Lauren/Kurt
Genre: Smut
Warning: Mild dubcon, if you’re very sensitive about it.
Spoilers: Up to S2 E13, Comeback. Anything referenced after that is pure conjecture on my part.
Disclaimer: So, so, so not mine. I think anyone actually connected with Glee would have a fit of hysterics if this was presented to them.
Word Count: ~2,500
Summary: Lauren and Kurt come to an arrangement.
Author Notes: Fill for this this prompt on the kink meme . I havered about posting it here, but then I remembered that I have no shame.
Mods, is there any chance of a 'Kurt&Lauren' tag?
Lauren Zizes looked on at the joyful reunion with a disgruntled expression. While she’d never admit it, she secretly enjoyed being a part of New Directions, where she hadn’t been shunned as she had so often before. And now that the slender youth had returned from his apparently exile to Gayton Academy, or whatever the place was called, she was fairly sure that her efforts, which were admittedly somewhat half-hearted, would now be surplus to requirements and she’d be asked to leave.
Still, that wasn’t the only thing she felt as she gazed over at the pale teen. She couldn’t help it - something in the way he exuded inner confidence despite all the crap the world put him through - she felt that in him she had a kindred spirit, someone who understood just what it felt like to have abuse hurled at you from all sides everywhere you went.
That, combined with his graceful poise and impeccable looks, made him unfairly attractive to her. He was someone who, along with most people in the room, she could dominate physically, but Lauren had a feeling that however hard she might try, she could never overpower him mentally. He was just too strong.
And Lauren admired that. She was turned on by that. So much so that, when they ended up alone in the choir room after everyone else had left (he packing his satchel, she lingering possibly-sort-of-intentionally), she called over to him.
“Hey.”
Kurt turned to her with a slightly puzzled expression. “What? I thought us gleeks were beneath your notice.”
Lauren shrugged. “Just wanted to let you know that I don’t give up easy. This club might be totally pathetic, but I’m not gonna leave until I choose to.”
Kurt’s puzzled look remained, his eyebrows slowly rising in mild surprise. “Why would we want you to leave? This club’s about accepting everyone, no matter what goes on in the rest of the school. That’s most of the reason why I came back.”
Lauren shrugged again. “Just thought I’d let you know that I won’t be going without a fight.”
An amused expression settled itself onto Kurt’s face. “A fight between you and me? I’m sure people would pay money to see me get taken to the floor by the school’s wrestling champion.”
“I’d beat you hand to hand, no contest.” She waved a hand dismissively. “But a battle of wills? I wouldn’t bet on me winning that,” Lauren responded. Hold on, did I just give him a compliment?
Kurt blinked at her dumbly. “Did you just… give me a compliment?” In her own, semi-insulting way, of course.
Lauren jerked her shoulder and tossed her head diffidently. This doesn’t happen! She thought. I don’t get lost for words! Especially not when faced with pale, skinny, strangely attractive gay kids.
“You did, didn’t you? I’ve never heard you say anything nice about anyone else. Ever.” Kurt eyed her speculatively.
Lauren did her best to keep the look of panic from her face. She thought she’d succeeded, but then Kurt spoke again.
“What’s so different about me? You faced down Puck without a problem, and he’s way more intimidating than I am.”
“Puckerman was weak.” Finally, she found something to say.
“He survived juvie.” Kurt wasn’t sure quite why he was defending Puck; the guy had been throwing him in dumpsters for years. But then, he had been told about Puck’s sticking up for him while he was away. Perhaps Kurt did owe him something.
“Only just. If I was in juvie, I’d rule that place within a week.” Back on familiar territory, Lauren regained her confidence.
“I don’t doubt it,” Kurt answered, with a nervous laugh.
With effort, Lauren pulled her usual disdainful expression onto her face. “You would totally be my bitch.”
“Probably.” Kurt was a little confused as to where this conversation was going.
“You don’t sound unhappy at the idea.” There was a questioning inflection in Lauren’s tone.
“Not really. Loath as I am to be anyone’s ‘bitch’, if I was your bitch, at least you’d look out for me. And successfully, too.”
“Damn right I would. If you were my bitch, I’d never let you go.”
A momentary look of panic flashed across Lauren’s features as she realised what she’d said.
“I wouldn’t object to that,” Kurt said softly, almost to himself.
Lauren looked at him, shocked at his response, so he explained, “I get tired of always having to look out for myself all the time.” Kurt’s explanation turned into contemplative musing: “It’d be nice to have someone else looking out for me.”
Lauren kept up her brash mask as well as she could as she said, “You’d have to do something for me in return.”
“Oh, really? What?”
The pair outwardly were utterly confident in themselves, but in reality they were walking tentatively along a knife edge, scared that they would push the other too far in this dangerous line of conversation.
“You’d have to be my bitch.” A small smirk crept carefully onto Lauren’s face as she took a step towards Kurt, but she was mentally preparing herself for Kurt to go pelting from the room at any moment.
Kurt slowly backed up several steps, coming to a halt when he bumped into the piano. He rested his hands on the smooth black surface on either side of him, and took a deep breath before responding, “What would that involve?” He kept his eyes fixed warily on Lauren’s.
“You’d have to let me do whatever I want with you. Don’t be scared; you’re too pretty, in a totally girly way, for me to want to damage. It would be just as good for you as it would for me.”
Kurt wasn’t sure when this had turned from a hypothetical situation in an imaginary juvenile detention centre to a real life proposition, but he had to admit that he was curious. He was gay, true, but he’d overheard enough conversation during football practice to grasp that apparently the less attractive someone was, the better they usually were in bed, because they felt like they had more to make up for. And whilst Lauren wasn’t exactly ugly, she didn’t come under any standard definition of the word ‘beautiful’.
So yeah, he was curious, and wanted to see exactly what Lauren was planning to do. “What do you have in mind?” he asked, trying to sound as bored as possible by the whole situation.
Lauren approached him, slowly, giving him time to run if he wanted. Kurt remained resolutely in place as she raised her hand and ran her forefinger down his red-and-blue check shirt covered chest. She slowed further as her fingertips reached his belt.
Her fingers remained there as they gazed steadily into each other’s eyes.
“Would you let me?” Lauren asked. She didn’t doubt that Kurt would be able to deal with it if he didn’t want it, but for some reason she cared enough about him that she didn’t want to make him go through any more hardship than he had to. She later realised that that was most likely the reason she’d brought up the whole ‘protection’ thing in the first place, but here in the present, she just wanted to be sure that he wanted this as much as she did.
“Yes.” Kurt breathed out the answer.
Instead of Lauren’s hand moving downward, as Kurt expected, she moved it sideways. She slipped her fingers through the buttons of his shirt and pulled it out from where it was carefully tucked into his whiter-than-white skinny jeans. She undid each button, one by one, from the bottom to the top, her eyes savouring the sight of his body being gradually revealed to her. His stomach was flat, his pecs lightly defined. His nipples were pink, and they rapidly hardened upon exposure to the air. She untied his white bow tie, leaving it undone around his neck.
Her hands skimmed up and down Kurt’s torso, revelling in the way his skin reacted to her touch. After a final glance at Kurt’s face, which had an expression of curiosity mixed with something else, possibly arousal, firmly fixed upon it, she bent down, and licked the flat of her tongue across one of his delectable looking nipples.
Kurt gasped, not expecting Lauren to make such a move. There she remained, her hands having come to rest on his hips. Kurt’s shirt and bow tie were still draped inelegantly across his shoulders.
Lauren’s tongue moved rapidly back and forth across his nipple, then she began to lick in a round motion, circling it several times before returning to the long flat strokes. She moved across and did the same to his other nipple. The cool air suddenly reaching his damp nipple made it even more rigid, and his cock twitched as it did so.
Lauren’s right hand had moved back to the front of his torso, and was sliding down his abs, touching skin that grew more and more sensitive as her hand lowered and her tongue worked his nipple.
As Lauren knelt down onto one knee, her lips moved lower and lower until they met her hand, just above Kurt’s belt. As she looked up at Kurt, he couldn’t help but ask her why she was doing this, why she wanted to do this with him of all people.
“Sugarcheeks, I’m a woman, I have needs. And by the feel of things…” she slid her hand lower, over the very definite bulge that had grown in the front of Kurt’s jeans, “You’re a guy, so do you.”
Lauren’s eyes were locked with Kurt’s from her position kneeling on the floor at his feet as she continued. “And that look you’ve got going on with the slender and the graceful and all that crap? Fucking sexy.”
“Really?” The genuine surprise and sincerity in Kurt’s voice caused Lauren to look back up from where she was watching her fingers run up and down the zipper line of Kurt’s pants.
Lauren’s voice was low and husky as her eyes met Kurt’s, “Fuck yes.” In that instant, the mask had vanished. She turned her attention back to Kurt’s crotch, where she quickly unbuckled his jeans, then slid the zip down. Slowly, tortuously slowly, one notch at a time. She could feel the warmth and pressure of his cock against the fabric beneath her hand.
Kurt watched Lauren, hardly able to believe what was happening. He was gay, he should not be so turned on by a girl’s feeling him up! Something in the way her confident mask slipped around him, making her vulnerable, it was something that made her deeply attractive to him. Never mind that her body didn’t turn him on in the slightest, it was her attitude that got him going.
He probably would have gone for it anyway, even if he hadn’t found that spark in her. After all, she was offering to keep him safe in exchange for whatever sexual favours he was happy to perform. He would still have had the power in the relationship. Also, a hand on your cock is a hand on your cock, if one is thinking literally. And he didn’t seem likely to find one anywhere else, especially since Blaine was no longer speaking to him for leaving Dalton.
But then Kurt felt her hand reach inside his black boxer briefs, and all logical thinking flew out of the window.
“Oh, yes…” he whispered as Lauren’s warm fingers wrapped around his now exposed cock (Lauren having gently extricated it from his underwear). She slid her hand carefully, uncertainly, along the length of it, moving up and down with a fairly loose grip.
She faltered after a few strokes. “Not wet enough,” Kurt heard her mutter.
“Doesn’t ma-“ Kurt started to say. He meant it - it didn’t matter that it wasn’t quite how he had pictured, it wasn’t wet and brisk; all that mattered was that the feeling of someone else’s warm hand, anyone’s hand that was not his own, working its way up and down his cock.
He was cut off, however, when Lauren leaned forward and her tongue darted out, licking the underside from his balls to the tip. Kurt gasped again and almost staggered backwards, his entire upper body weight now supported by his arms on either side of him.
Lauren’s left hand rested on Kurt’s hip bone, her right was now underneath, caressing his balls. Her tongue slipped rapidly up and down his cock, working over every possible angle as Kurt groaned deeply in pleasure.
Just when Kurt thought that it couldn’t get any better, her hot, wet, mouth engulfed the tip of his cock. He tried to hold back, call a warning, anything, but the firm swipe of her tongue over his slit sent him tumbling straight over the edge, his come spurting into Lauren’s mouth as he reached his peak.
After a moment of shock, Lauren handled it like a pro, pulling back, pausing, and swallowing. Her tongue emerged again to catch the small white droplets still around her mouth.
She knelt back and looked up at him appraisingly. “Not bad, gay boy. I’ve tasted worse.”
Kurt just gaped at her, bones feeling like jelly as he tried not to collapse onto the floor.
Lauren got to her feet and dusted herself down, looking back at Kurt, who hadn’t moved, when she had done so.
“You’re mine now, bitch. Now pull yourself together and get your sexy, scrawny ass out of here.”
Kurt remained where he was, gasping, shirt open, pants undone, cock out, draped over the grand piano.
“Bitch, I own your ass now. If you want me to look after it, you’d better get your ass moving when I tell you to.”
Kurt pulled himself together, tucking himself back into his jeans (which looked perfectly clean, she didn’t seem to have spilled a drop, though they were white which hid it well) and buttoning up his shirt. He looked at her defiantly as he did so. Kurt Hummel did not do embarrassed.
When Kurt was dressed, he picked up his bag, nodded to Lauren, and left the room, his gait as swishy and proud as usual.
Lauren smiled after him. Together, she and Kurt would rule McKinley. If that meant getting on her knees every once in a while, so be it. If she got to be the only girl to get her hands on that body, she was quite happy. And of course, she would never let Kurt know that he really had the upper hand in the equation. Life was so much more fun with boys at her beck and call.
(The bullies of McKinley soon gave up beating up Kurt when Lauren Zizes came to call each time it happened. They also gave up taunting Lauren when each insult incurred the wrath of Kurt Hummel’s tongue. Little did they know exactly why the pair had suddenly teamed up - and if you’d have told them, they simply wouldn’t have believed you. Kurt and Lauren were happy to leave them in confusion).
Partially inspired by Puckurt’s Give Kurt A Blow Job Campaign