Fic: Payback
Title: Payback
Rating: PG13
Spoilers: BIOTA
Warnings: May be a bit hard to follow if Apples to Apples confuses you
Word Count: 1750
Summary: A cheesy little story... Blaine is tired of Kurt's snide comments about his kiss with Rachel, so he comes up with a solution.
Burt Hummel, by his own admission, was never the sharpest tool in the shed. But sometimes, he managed to come up with the most marvelous solutions to seemingly insurmountable problems.
Case in point: Friday night dinners. The tradition was sacred to him, but he soon realized that with two teenaged boys, the pull of socializing with people their own age might be too great for him to compete. There were dates to be had, parties to attend, sleepovers with girls (for Kurt) or boys (for Finn).
Burt's ingenious solution was to create a second tradition: Friday night parties.
Now, having twenty teenagers descend weekly upon the Hudmel house was no picnic. But this way, Burt knew that his boys had incentive to attend Friday night dinners beforehand. Plus, he didn't have to worry about them going to a party elsewhere and being tempted by booze, or worse. The kids were safe under his roof, and that's how he liked it.
"I trust you two," he told Finn and Kurt before their fourth Friday night party. The words should have been a compliment, but they came off sounding more like a warning.
"Aww, thanks, Burt," Finn replied cheerily. He tended to miss subtext, as a general rule.
"We'll behave, Dad," Kurt assured his father, as the doorbell announced the arrival of their first guests.
Opening the door revealed Mike and Tina, who had brought a bag of shrimp chips (My mom made me, Mike said, embarrassed. Don't eat them. They taste exactly like you'd imagine) and a couple bags of Ruffles. Blaine arrived a few minutes later with several bottles of soda. Rachel brought cookies; Puck and Lauren brought, oddly, a jumbo pack of Peeps.
The junk food stack only grew as the other New Directions kids arrived. They settled in the basement den, gathered around the big-screen TV set. Some sort of game was playing -- Kurt didn't much care what sort -- and Finn, Puck, Lauren, Mike, Sam, and Blaine were cheering or hissing, depending on the play. Artie and Brittany were snuggled in the corner, while Santana pointedly sat in Sam's lap, tracing his lips with her finger. Mercedes, Tina, Rachel and Quinn were settled on the far side of the room, sprawled on the floor and engrossed in a game of Apples to Apples.
Kurt stood by the refreshments table, deliberating where to sit. The board game would be more fun, but he wanted to spend time with Blaine, too. As he pondered, Rachel came up beside him to grab a cookie.
"How are things going with you two?" she asked, following his gaze.
"Oh, fine," he replied.
"Just fine?"
He sighed. "Cone of silence?"
"Of course."
"He's been... a gentleman."
"That's sweet," she said with a smile. Then she saw his dejected face and added, "No, that's not sweet, no. What? No."
"We had a talk before we started dating," he said, "and my level of inexperience became very clear to him. I think he's trying to take things slow so he doesn't scare me off."
"But?"
"But I want to make out with my boyfriend," Kurt said in frustration. "We kiss, but if I even try opening my mouth, he shuts down." He frowned. "Maybe he doesn't like me as much as I like him."
Rachel put on her best Bossy Face. "What you need, Kurt, is a rival."
"Yeah, uh, I've had enough rivals for Blaine's affections. I don't need any more."
"Not Blaine's affections -- yours. You need to make him good and jealous. Nothing increases a guy's libido like a good old-fashioned case of the green monster."
"Right, like that worked out for you with Finn when you made out with Puck? Spare me, Rachel."
"Scoff all you want, but I'm right."
"If I show an interest in another guy, all it will achieve is making him feel insecure about our relationship. So no, I'm going to pass."
They each took another cookie before heading over to the Apples to Apples crew. Kurt grabbed a handful of cards and joined the next hand.
Mercedes chewed her lip slowly, deliberating the best match for the green card Inspiring. "Okay," she said. "Well, Madonna is inspiring as a fellow diva, of course. Hillary Rodham Clinton is good... but French toast?" They all started giggling as Quinn hid her face, shrieking I had no good cards for it, guys. "But the clear winner," Mercedes said, "is my savior, Jesus Christ."
"Ha!" Kurt gloated, grabbing the green card as the mouths of the girls around him fell open in surprise.
"What happened to being an atheist?" Tina asked.
"I don't have to believe, I just have to know that Mercedes does." He drew a green card from the deck. "Okay, the next word is... Sensual." He felt a hand squeeze his shoulder, and looked up to find Blaine standing over him. "Tired of the big game?"
"I can watch the replays on ESPN," Blaine replied, sitting down beside him and wrapping an arm around his waist. "I don't want to miss out on spending time with you."
Tina and Quinn cooed together as Kurt blushed. "All right, everyone throw in a card," he said, shifting a little closer to Blaine. The girls each chose a red card from their hands and tossed them into the center of the pack. "Okay, let's see what you ladies think is sensual." He flipped over the first card."Roses. Not bad. Silk, nice. Swiss chocolate, okay. And the last one-" He flipped over the last card, which read Create your own card. "Ooh, intriguing. Whose is it?"
"Mine," Tina said, smirking. "And I choose, Blaine's kisses."
"No contest," Kurt grinned, bowing and passing the green card to Tina.
"I agree," Rachel said primly. "Blaine's kisses are incredibly sensual."
Kurt's smile faded instantly.
"Awkward..." whispered Quinn.
"What? They are," insisted Rachel. "Not too firm, not too soft... nice and warm and-"
"Okay!" Kurt said loudly. "Who's next?"
"There's no need to get upset, Kurt," Rachel told him. "Blaine's and my relationship wasn't-"
"Your relationship?"
"We kissed, we went out on dates-"
"One date."
"Guys, come on," Blaine interjected, looking uncomfortable. "We've been through all this. I'm gay. I'm with Kurt. Very happily so." Kurt was glaring openly at Rachel now, and Blaine decided to remove himself from the situation briefly. "Sweetie, I'm going to get something to drink. Would you like anything?"
"No," Kurt said. "But thanks."
Blaine got up and headed over to the refreshments table. He poured himself a cup of Coke, noticing with some dread that Rachel had leaned over to whisper something to Kurt. She was a nice enough girl, but sometimes he wished she would learn a bit of tact. By the time he returned to the group, they were immersed in the game again.
"Nauseating," Tina read aloud.
"Too bad there's not a red card that says Rachel and Blaine kissing," Kurt said archly. "It would win instantly."
"Ooh, I've got the winner right here," Mercedes said loudly, tossing her card into the pile.
Quinn drained the last of her soda. "Blaine, was there more Coke over there?"
"Actually, no," he said apologetically, "I finished off the bottle."
"Don't bring it over here," Kurt added. "Rachel might try to spin it."
Blaine cleared his throat. "Hey, can I play too?"
"Sure," Quinn said. "Take seven red cards, and submit the one that best fits the description on the green card."
"Cool." Blaine took a look at his cards as the rest of the group played the next hand, which Rachel won.
"Next word is... ooh, it's a Create your own!" She smirked, and Blaine was instantly uneasy. "I want to see words that remind people of Blaine."
Blaine paled. "Huh?"
"That's easy," Tina said, plucking out a red card and throwing it in. The others followed suit, and Rachel shuffled and laid out the cards.
"Let's see... we've got Puppy... Michael Jackson... The Four Seasons... Neckties... and-" Rachel cocked her head at the last card. "Bicycles?"
"It was the only word I had that started with bi," Kurt said.
"Oh my god!" Blaine burst out. "Kurt, we've been over this a million times! I'm not attracted to girls. Not at all."
"I still think he'll come around," Rachel whispered to Tina loudly.
"When you kiss another person, it feels good," Blaine went on. "But that doesn't mean there's romance involved." Kurt continued to sulk silently, and Blaine rubbed at his temples. "What do I have to do to convince you?"
"You could have Kurt kiss Rachel," Tina suggested. Rachel smiled in agreement, and she took out her chapstick at once, preparing.
"That's ridiculous," Kurt said quickly.
Blaine's eyes lit up. "No, Tina's right. If you kiss Rachel, you'll see what I'm talking about." He leaned closer to Kurt. "I really want you to understand that you don't need to worry about me leaving you for a girl. Please? For me?"
Kurt stared at him, then heaved a heavy sigh. "I suppose."
Rachel crawled over to sit beside him, then put her arms around his neck. "Pucker up, Hummel," she said, and then she kissed him.
The kiss started out soft, but after a few seconds, Kurt deepened it. He ran his hands down to rest on Rachel's waist, as she buried one of her hands in his hair. Over and over they kissed, more and more frantically, as the rest of their friends looked on in shock.
It was only when a little moan escaped from Kurt's throat that Blaine cut in. "Okay, that's enough of that," he said, pulling Kurt back.
Kurt's lips were rosy and swollen, and he looked dazed. "Wow, Rachel. Just... wow."
"I'll say," Rachel agreed admiringly. "You sure you're gay?"
"Yeah, but still, wow-"
"Hey Kurt," Blaine interjected loudly, his eyes wide. “Did you put up that new poster in your room yet?"
"The one of the original cast of Wicked? Yeah, last week."
"Let's go look at it. In your bedroom. For a while." Blaine grabbed him by the arm, tugging him to his feet. "Don't wait up," he told the others. As he and Kurt made their way over to the stairs, he murmured, "That was the hottest fucking thing I've ever seen. Can we make out now?"
Kurt threw a conspiratorial smile back at Rachel, who returned it with a wink, mouthing You're welcome.
Rating: PG13
Spoilers: BIOTA
Warnings: May be a bit hard to follow if Apples to Apples confuses you
Word Count: 1750
Summary: A cheesy little story... Blaine is tired of Kurt's snide comments about his kiss with Rachel, so he comes up with a solution.
Burt Hummel, by his own admission, was never the sharpest tool in the shed. But sometimes, he managed to come up with the most marvelous solutions to seemingly insurmountable problems.
Case in point: Friday night dinners. The tradition was sacred to him, but he soon realized that with two teenaged boys, the pull of socializing with people their own age might be too great for him to compete. There were dates to be had, parties to attend, sleepovers with girls (for Kurt) or boys (for Finn).
Burt's ingenious solution was to create a second tradition: Friday night parties.
Now, having twenty teenagers descend weekly upon the Hudmel house was no picnic. But this way, Burt knew that his boys had incentive to attend Friday night dinners beforehand. Plus, he didn't have to worry about them going to a party elsewhere and being tempted by booze, or worse. The kids were safe under his roof, and that's how he liked it.
"I trust you two," he told Finn and Kurt before their fourth Friday night party. The words should have been a compliment, but they came off sounding more like a warning.
"Aww, thanks, Burt," Finn replied cheerily. He tended to miss subtext, as a general rule.
"We'll behave, Dad," Kurt assured his father, as the doorbell announced the arrival of their first guests.
Opening the door revealed Mike and Tina, who had brought a bag of shrimp chips (My mom made me, Mike said, embarrassed. Don't eat them. They taste exactly like you'd imagine) and a couple bags of Ruffles. Blaine arrived a few minutes later with several bottles of soda. Rachel brought cookies; Puck and Lauren brought, oddly, a jumbo pack of Peeps.
The junk food stack only grew as the other New Directions kids arrived. They settled in the basement den, gathered around the big-screen TV set. Some sort of game was playing -- Kurt didn't much care what sort -- and Finn, Puck, Lauren, Mike, Sam, and Blaine were cheering or hissing, depending on the play. Artie and Brittany were snuggled in the corner, while Santana pointedly sat in Sam's lap, tracing his lips with her finger. Mercedes, Tina, Rachel and Quinn were settled on the far side of the room, sprawled on the floor and engrossed in a game of Apples to Apples.
Kurt stood by the refreshments table, deliberating where to sit. The board game would be more fun, but he wanted to spend time with Blaine, too. As he pondered, Rachel came up beside him to grab a cookie.
"How are things going with you two?" she asked, following his gaze.
"Oh, fine," he replied.
"Just fine?"
He sighed. "Cone of silence?"
"Of course."
"He's been... a gentleman."
"That's sweet," she said with a smile. Then she saw his dejected face and added, "No, that's not sweet, no. What? No."
"We had a talk before we started dating," he said, "and my level of inexperience became very clear to him. I think he's trying to take things slow so he doesn't scare me off."
"But?"
"But I want to make out with my boyfriend," Kurt said in frustration. "We kiss, but if I even try opening my mouth, he shuts down." He frowned. "Maybe he doesn't like me as much as I like him."
Rachel put on her best Bossy Face. "What you need, Kurt, is a rival."
"Yeah, uh, I've had enough rivals for Blaine's affections. I don't need any more."
"Not Blaine's affections -- yours. You need to make him good and jealous. Nothing increases a guy's libido like a good old-fashioned case of the green monster."
"Right, like that worked out for you with Finn when you made out with Puck? Spare me, Rachel."
"Scoff all you want, but I'm right."
"If I show an interest in another guy, all it will achieve is making him feel insecure about our relationship. So no, I'm going to pass."
They each took another cookie before heading over to the Apples to Apples crew. Kurt grabbed a handful of cards and joined the next hand.
Mercedes chewed her lip slowly, deliberating the best match for the green card Inspiring. "Okay," she said. "Well, Madonna is inspiring as a fellow diva, of course. Hillary Rodham Clinton is good... but French toast?" They all started giggling as Quinn hid her face, shrieking I had no good cards for it, guys. "But the clear winner," Mercedes said, "is my savior, Jesus Christ."
"Ha!" Kurt gloated, grabbing the green card as the mouths of the girls around him fell open in surprise.
"What happened to being an atheist?" Tina asked.
"I don't have to believe, I just have to know that Mercedes does." He drew a green card from the deck. "Okay, the next word is... Sensual." He felt a hand squeeze his shoulder, and looked up to find Blaine standing over him. "Tired of the big game?"
"I can watch the replays on ESPN," Blaine replied, sitting down beside him and wrapping an arm around his waist. "I don't want to miss out on spending time with you."
Tina and Quinn cooed together as Kurt blushed. "All right, everyone throw in a card," he said, shifting a little closer to Blaine. The girls each chose a red card from their hands and tossed them into the center of the pack. "Okay, let's see what you ladies think is sensual." He flipped over the first card."Roses. Not bad. Silk, nice. Swiss chocolate, okay. And the last one-" He flipped over the last card, which read Create your own card. "Ooh, intriguing. Whose is it?"
"Mine," Tina said, smirking. "And I choose, Blaine's kisses."
"No contest," Kurt grinned, bowing and passing the green card to Tina.
"I agree," Rachel said primly. "Blaine's kisses are incredibly sensual."
Kurt's smile faded instantly.
"Awkward..." whispered Quinn.
"What? They are," insisted Rachel. "Not too firm, not too soft... nice and warm and-"
"Okay!" Kurt said loudly. "Who's next?"
"There's no need to get upset, Kurt," Rachel told him. "Blaine's and my relationship wasn't-"
"Your relationship?"
"We kissed, we went out on dates-"
"One date."
"Guys, come on," Blaine interjected, looking uncomfortable. "We've been through all this. I'm gay. I'm with Kurt. Very happily so." Kurt was glaring openly at Rachel now, and Blaine decided to remove himself from the situation briefly. "Sweetie, I'm going to get something to drink. Would you like anything?"
"No," Kurt said. "But thanks."
Blaine got up and headed over to the refreshments table. He poured himself a cup of Coke, noticing with some dread that Rachel had leaned over to whisper something to Kurt. She was a nice enough girl, but sometimes he wished she would learn a bit of tact. By the time he returned to the group, they were immersed in the game again.
"Nauseating," Tina read aloud.
"Too bad there's not a red card that says Rachel and Blaine kissing," Kurt said archly. "It would win instantly."
"Ooh, I've got the winner right here," Mercedes said loudly, tossing her card into the pile.
Quinn drained the last of her soda. "Blaine, was there more Coke over there?"
"Actually, no," he said apologetically, "I finished off the bottle."
"Don't bring it over here," Kurt added. "Rachel might try to spin it."
Blaine cleared his throat. "Hey, can I play too?"
"Sure," Quinn said. "Take seven red cards, and submit the one that best fits the description on the green card."
"Cool." Blaine took a look at his cards as the rest of the group played the next hand, which Rachel won.
"Next word is... ooh, it's a Create your own!" She smirked, and Blaine was instantly uneasy. "I want to see words that remind people of Blaine."
Blaine paled. "Huh?"
"That's easy," Tina said, plucking out a red card and throwing it in. The others followed suit, and Rachel shuffled and laid out the cards.
"Let's see... we've got Puppy... Michael Jackson... The Four Seasons... Neckties... and-" Rachel cocked her head at the last card. "Bicycles?"
"It was the only word I had that started with bi," Kurt said.
"Oh my god!" Blaine burst out. "Kurt, we've been over this a million times! I'm not attracted to girls. Not at all."
"I still think he'll come around," Rachel whispered to Tina loudly.
"When you kiss another person, it feels good," Blaine went on. "But that doesn't mean there's romance involved." Kurt continued to sulk silently, and Blaine rubbed at his temples. "What do I have to do to convince you?"
"You could have Kurt kiss Rachel," Tina suggested. Rachel smiled in agreement, and she took out her chapstick at once, preparing.
"That's ridiculous," Kurt said quickly.
Blaine's eyes lit up. "No, Tina's right. If you kiss Rachel, you'll see what I'm talking about." He leaned closer to Kurt. "I really want you to understand that you don't need to worry about me leaving you for a girl. Please? For me?"
Kurt stared at him, then heaved a heavy sigh. "I suppose."
Rachel crawled over to sit beside him, then put her arms around his neck. "Pucker up, Hummel," she said, and then she kissed him.
The kiss started out soft, but after a few seconds, Kurt deepened it. He ran his hands down to rest on Rachel's waist, as she buried one of her hands in his hair. Over and over they kissed, more and more frantically, as the rest of their friends looked on in shock.
It was only when a little moan escaped from Kurt's throat that Blaine cut in. "Okay, that's enough of that," he said, pulling Kurt back.
Kurt's lips were rosy and swollen, and he looked dazed. "Wow, Rachel. Just... wow."
"I'll say," Rachel agreed admiringly. "You sure you're gay?"
"Yeah, but still, wow-"
"Hey Kurt," Blaine interjected loudly, his eyes wide. “Did you put up that new poster in your room yet?"
"The one of the original cast of Wicked? Yeah, last week."
"Let's go look at it. In your bedroom. For a while." Blaine grabbed him by the arm, tugging him to his feet. "Don't wait up," he told the others. As he and Kurt made their way over to the stairs, he murmured, "That was the hottest fucking thing I've ever seen. Can we make out now?"
Kurt threw a conspiratorial smile back at Rachel, who returned it with a wink, mouthing You're welcome.