A lot happens in 12 weeks.

[kurinnu]

"The best thing for being sad," replied Merlin, beginning to puff and blow, "is to learn something. That's the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds. There is only one thing for it then- to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting. Learning is the only thing for you. Look what a lot of things there are to learn."
--T.H White

I am doing a lot of fucking learning.
Learning to forget. Learning to learn. Learning to grow.
I am hoping to get this research assistant position in the Geo/Anthro Department for next year.
I am hoping to be on Star Island, away from everything this summer. And if Star Island doesn't work out...I am getting in a city. I am moving somewhere no one knows my name.

Maybe I am a little messed up right now, but nothing like this has ever happened to me before. And I am trying so fucking hard. I am trying to be a good person. A good person who is lost for now, trying to get found, eventually. For myself. Not for anyone else.

So I have to keep learning...