(no subject)
whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa...
i'm baaaccck.. i have not written in this thing in forrreevver... unbelievable of all the thoughts and feelings i have written in here on this internet journal... alot alot has changed since i wrote in this last, and what i have said about college..
too all you high school people: i know you have a couple days left of high school, but please live it up.. college only gets worse in the academic fields.. its hard as shit.. you do have to read and study in college, even though bishop never taught us that.
as i'm sitting up in my bed, and it is 3:03 am on saturday morning (or friday night whichever you would like to call it) you may not have to get up every morning at 6:00, but you will find yourself having sleepless nights of writing papers, and reading chapters of your boring assssssss anthropology book which you will find out will get you no where, even when you are studying for the 7 page written essay exam. yup thats life in a nutshell..
In a couple entries back I said I was staying at oakland and going into nursing.-- NOT. Changed my mind once again. In the fall I'm pretty sure i will be transferring to central like intended to in the first place. No more Nursing program for me either, I have discovered that the nursing program is for geniouses and I am not one of those. That's for sure. I will be going into Elementary Education, and CMU has a great program for that.
I loved Oakland. The first couple of weeks sucked, and i wanted to transfer to CMU just right then, but this year has been pretty fuckin sweet, i must say. Dance Team was awesome and i have made some of the greatest friends I have ever had in my life. It was such a good bonding experience for me. However I came across people who i thought were my friends, and are obviously not, and i also came across people whom i absolutely hated and still do hate. you can't win with everyone that's for sure, and they're WILL BE PEOPLE WHO LIKE YOU AND THOSE WHO WILL HATE YOU. TOUGH.
Leaving OU, i will be sacrificing alot that i have had on my plate. This semester i have worked 2 jobs, one during the day, and one at night, been on dance team which consisted of 2 games per week if not more, and practices 2 nights a week, and also going to school full time and studying on top of all that. It is way too much than i can entirely handle. I need to give some of it up. However, me transferring to CMU will be a smack in the face. I will be giving up working, and dancing. Dancing which has been the most important thing behind friends and family that has been a part of my life since i was 3 years old. My mother is upset, but i can't ride through life on dance when it is never going to get me anywhere besides for my pure enjoyment.
By transferring to CMU i hope to get better grades than i was getting at OU, focusing on school, living on my own in copper beech with some of my favorite girls, and making new friends as always. Hopefully this will work out for me, if not, there's no turning back, considering everything I am deciding to give up. If i hate it entirely, there's always home right?
My dad is a big supporter and my mom is still very unsure of it, BUT i told myself this was something I was going to consider my whole first year of college, and posssibly something i was going to pursue.
Now is the time i need to do it. I can not go half way through of college at OU and decide i want to go to central in 2 years.. it just doesnt work that way for me. If i'm half way through anything, i'm going to finish it. If i don't transfer, I know myself that i will be kicking myself like an idiot for not at least trying it out. I couldn't make this decision last year around this time as a senior, and I'm STILL having a hard time making this decision now, but really I think this is what i want to do.
My friends from Oakland are not supporting me really, but i don't expect them too. Simply they just don't want me to leave them, and I understand that. I can't base what i want to do and what i feel on the people around me though. My education and career is more important. I'm sorry.
Other than that, the boys, the drama.. its all the same.. their really has been no one since jordan. fuck that. i really dont' even care.. i have my fun, and thats all i need..I've met some great people this year, and now its time for another milestone of my life.. going away to school which has been something i've always wanted to do
now ryan sarnowski is iming and asking me for money even though i havent talked to him in a fucking year... fucking go figure.. shit never changes...
weird...
i'm baaaccck.. i have not written in this thing in forrreevver... unbelievable of all the thoughts and feelings i have written in here on this internet journal... alot alot has changed since i wrote in this last, and what i have said about college..
too all you high school people: i know you have a couple days left of high school, but please live it up.. college only gets worse in the academic fields.. its hard as shit.. you do have to read and study in college, even though bishop never taught us that.
as i'm sitting up in my bed, and it is 3:03 am on saturday morning (or friday night whichever you would like to call it) you may not have to get up every morning at 6:00, but you will find yourself having sleepless nights of writing papers, and reading chapters of your boring assssssss anthropology book which you will find out will get you no where, even when you are studying for the 7 page written essay exam. yup thats life in a nutshell..
In a couple entries back I said I was staying at oakland and going into nursing.-- NOT. Changed my mind once again. In the fall I'm pretty sure i will be transferring to central like intended to in the first place. No more Nursing program for me either, I have discovered that the nursing program is for geniouses and I am not one of those. That's for sure. I will be going into Elementary Education, and CMU has a great program for that.
I loved Oakland. The first couple of weeks sucked, and i wanted to transfer to CMU just right then, but this year has been pretty fuckin sweet, i must say. Dance Team was awesome and i have made some of the greatest friends I have ever had in my life. It was such a good bonding experience for me. However I came across people who i thought were my friends, and are obviously not, and i also came across people whom i absolutely hated and still do hate. you can't win with everyone that's for sure, and they're WILL BE PEOPLE WHO LIKE YOU AND THOSE WHO WILL HATE YOU. TOUGH.
Leaving OU, i will be sacrificing alot that i have had on my plate. This semester i have worked 2 jobs, one during the day, and one at night, been on dance team which consisted of 2 games per week if not more, and practices 2 nights a week, and also going to school full time and studying on top of all that. It is way too much than i can entirely handle. I need to give some of it up. However, me transferring to CMU will be a smack in the face. I will be giving up working, and dancing. Dancing which has been the most important thing behind friends and family that has been a part of my life since i was 3 years old. My mother is upset, but i can't ride through life on dance when it is never going to get me anywhere besides for my pure enjoyment.
By transferring to CMU i hope to get better grades than i was getting at OU, focusing on school, living on my own in copper beech with some of my favorite girls, and making new friends as always. Hopefully this will work out for me, if not, there's no turning back, considering everything I am deciding to give up. If i hate it entirely, there's always home right?
My dad is a big supporter and my mom is still very unsure of it, BUT i told myself this was something I was going to consider my whole first year of college, and posssibly something i was going to pursue.
Now is the time i need to do it. I can not go half way through of college at OU and decide i want to go to central in 2 years.. it just doesnt work that way for me. If i'm half way through anything, i'm going to finish it. If i don't transfer, I know myself that i will be kicking myself like an idiot for not at least trying it out. I couldn't make this decision last year around this time as a senior, and I'm STILL having a hard time making this decision now, but really I think this is what i want to do.
My friends from Oakland are not supporting me really, but i don't expect them too. Simply they just don't want me to leave them, and I understand that. I can't base what i want to do and what i feel on the people around me though. My education and career is more important. I'm sorry.
Other than that, the boys, the drama.. its all the same.. their really has been no one since jordan. fuck that. i really dont' even care.. i have my fun, and thats all i need..I've met some great people this year, and now its time for another milestone of my life.. going away to school which has been something i've always wanted to do
now ryan sarnowski is iming and asking me for money even though i havent talked to him in a fucking year... fucking go figure.. shit never changes...
weird...