(no subject)
ok, here it is. i know i have said this before but now i have a whole new level of anger at some of you. now this is mainly for those of you i conceder really close friends.
now i under stand that you all have other lives that have nothing to do with me. and i do realize that you have taken time out of those lives to come and get me or take me home. and i am truly grateful for that. and i know that this may seem like just a stupid thing to you. but i don't have many friends. and i have only 3 friends here. one of them works after school and on weekends and one of them has a new boyfriend. and the last one is really nice and kind and fun but her mother is more up tight about her daughter doing things away from home then my mom is at her worst. so i try to go down there as often as i can for two reasons. one i really miss you all, and two is that i get really lonely for the company of others not of my family. but no one calls me just to talk, no one writes me anything every often, no one really makes me feel like i am missed every much at all. and that may be true. that the reason you don't do this is because you have so many friends around you that you just barely notice that i'm not around. and so to do any of this just doesn’t enter your mind.
but it makes me wonder sometimes. Nicole, you mad it seem like i had a ride down there when i was going to your prom, but then i couldn't and it was like you didn't care if i came down at all because i couldn't go to prom. i didn't care about going to prom. hell i didn't even go to this schools one either. i wanted to see people i care about. but the only two that made my feel wanted was nick (because he always does) and Alicia. and i did have fun with Alicia. it was nice to have time to hang out with her. but Kayla didn't seem to care. Liz you didn't even call to see if we could maybe do something before i left. and you Nicole, you only wanted to remind me to pick up the damn fucking story so we could finish it. i was really hurt by that. well not that but by the feeling i got from that. if i have been a burden in the past to you then you should have said so. if i over stay or do something that offends you then tell me. and i will try to fix it or try to make sure i never do it again. (Ashley, Kathy, and Andrew this does not count for you because i do consider you close friends but i just don't get to hang out with you as much as the others. i do wish you would call me some times.) some times i just really want to burn this fucking story. i really do. but i won't.
well i have a headache now so i’m saying good bye.
sarah.
now i under stand that you all have other lives that have nothing to do with me. and i do realize that you have taken time out of those lives to come and get me or take me home. and i am truly grateful for that. and i know that this may seem like just a stupid thing to you. but i don't have many friends. and i have only 3 friends here. one of them works after school and on weekends and one of them has a new boyfriend. and the last one is really nice and kind and fun but her mother is more up tight about her daughter doing things away from home then my mom is at her worst. so i try to go down there as often as i can for two reasons. one i really miss you all, and two is that i get really lonely for the company of others not of my family. but no one calls me just to talk, no one writes me anything every often, no one really makes me feel like i am missed every much at all. and that may be true. that the reason you don't do this is because you have so many friends around you that you just barely notice that i'm not around. and so to do any of this just doesn’t enter your mind.
but it makes me wonder sometimes. Nicole, you mad it seem like i had a ride down there when i was going to your prom, but then i couldn't and it was like you didn't care if i came down at all because i couldn't go to prom. i didn't care about going to prom. hell i didn't even go to this schools one either. i wanted to see people i care about. but the only two that made my feel wanted was nick (because he always does) and Alicia. and i did have fun with Alicia. it was nice to have time to hang out with her. but Kayla didn't seem to care. Liz you didn't even call to see if we could maybe do something before i left. and you Nicole, you only wanted to remind me to pick up the damn fucking story so we could finish it. i was really hurt by that. well not that but by the feeling i got from that. if i have been a burden in the past to you then you should have said so. if i over stay or do something that offends you then tell me. and i will try to fix it or try to make sure i never do it again. (Ashley, Kathy, and Andrew this does not count for you because i do consider you close friends but i just don't get to hang out with you as much as the others. i do wish you would call me some times.) some times i just really want to burn this fucking story. i really do. but i won't.
well i have a headache now so i’m saying good bye.
sarah.