Waste of Space
I'm so bored, but it's not like i want to do anything anyway. Why the fuck are we having all these holiday's? and how do Easter and St. Patrick's Day belong in the same month. Now, I'm not bitching about the chance to get disgustingly innebriated and deck it out w/ some ramndom stranger because they said something about your momma- but when your dad replaces the stranger, the situation get's a little fucked up. Not that I've ever had said experience (my Dad and I don't drink together), but similar things have happened to my dear little EXX on many festive occasions- which is why he's going to have himself another St. Patrick's Day with his "tough-guy" friends, and then I'm going to have to listen to him bitch about how he realizes his life is totally pathetic. I love him always as a friend, but he can't manage to do anything except break what he builds. Maybe it's a guy thing. Now that I think about this- the majority of guys I've been with share a similar sense of self-loathing. Can I just date one guy who doesn't walk around feeling sorry for himself!?!?! I was reading this book about goddesses that Aish gave to me, and in one of the stories the White Buffalo Woman (Sioux Goddess) appears before these two guys and one of them trys to grab her so she charrs him to shit with a bolt of lightning, but to the young man, "who stood in respectful awe..." She gives him knowledge of how to save his ppl. Real life should be like that..... Now i sound like a psycho male-charring feminist (not that there is anything wrong with them). I think I'm just feeling like shit because I'm confused- about everything, but it's cool, I'll figure it out, and hopefully it will be postive... Hmm, I've said too much- many things I shouldn't be worrying about right now. Well, I've accomplished nothing but killing time rambling about meaningless bullshit. THis sux. This is not therapeutic!!! (Dickie). It just makes me realize how crazy I am and how nothing I think about is really all that bloody interesting in the first place....