Ganked from Cdayzee - The (partial) Manual of Kukla_Red
1. How can I tell if you're angry?
If I am angry about something that involves me, I get very quiet. If I am angry about something that involves someone else, I get really loud.
2. How should I behave around you if you're angry?
Don't try to "fix" the problem or fix me unless I ask you for advice. Hear me out and let me rant if I need to. And if I don't want to talk, don't push it. Give me space and let me get my emotions under control.
3. How do you want me to behave when you are hurting emotionally? How is it best to comfort you?
Mostly just listen to me. A hug is pretty much always welcome. If I am sad, remind me of the good things in the world. But don't push too hard. Sometimes being sad is what I need to be.
4. Are there things we should not discuss?
I am pretty open to discussion about just about anything, but if we are really on opposite sides about something, let's just agree to disagree and still be friends. I really hate it when someone tries to "convert" me.
5. How should I treat you when you are ill?
I will say this now - I am a lousy patient. I have always been the caretaker person - I am very good at taking care of others. I have had very little experience in the past with being taken care of and even though David has been valiantly trying to take care of me for 5 years now, I am still not used to it. So show concern, bring me some soup (I love matzoh ball soup) and maybe a silly magazine or book. And just keep me company.
6. What makes you happy that's in my power to grant you?
An expression of friendship. Show that you want to get to know me and I'll open up like a flower.
7. How would you like us to recognize your birthday?
See #6. Same thing applies. Maybe with a hug. I love to be remembered. I spent so many birthdays as a child and an adult alone and unremembered.
8. Are there any standing categories of presents that would be appropriate or unwelcome?
I really REALLY hate things like April Fool's gags, things that are intended to be jokes. Sorry, but it is just not my cup of tea.
9. Are there times of the year that are difficult for you? Please explain if you are comfortable.
Spring, which has always been one of my favorite times of year is hard for me now. I'll explain... My mom's birthday is March 6th, mine is April 17th and my dad's is May 4th. Their wedding anniversary is June 11th. My dad died on April 6, 2000 and my mom died on March 28, 2001. So many dates with memories - happy and sad - are all grouped together in a big clump. It gets a little easier with each passing year, but I usually get a bit melancholy in the Spring now. And a little too at Thanksgiving. That is my favorite holiday and I really miss my family at that time.
10. Are there important anniversaries in your life?
See #9 for several. And June 25, which is my anniversary with David.
11. How do I cater for you if you are visiting me?
I don't need catering. Just sit and talk.
12. If I want to contact you, how should I do it?
Call me! Or email... but I love hearing the voices of my friends. Emoticons are no substitute for real emotion.
Would love to see others' 'manuals' :)
If I am angry about something that involves me, I get very quiet. If I am angry about something that involves someone else, I get really loud.
2. How should I behave around you if you're angry?
Don't try to "fix" the problem or fix me unless I ask you for advice. Hear me out and let me rant if I need to. And if I don't want to talk, don't push it. Give me space and let me get my emotions under control.
3. How do you want me to behave when you are hurting emotionally? How is it best to comfort you?
Mostly just listen to me. A hug is pretty much always welcome. If I am sad, remind me of the good things in the world. But don't push too hard. Sometimes being sad is what I need to be.
4. Are there things we should not discuss?
I am pretty open to discussion about just about anything, but if we are really on opposite sides about something, let's just agree to disagree and still be friends. I really hate it when someone tries to "convert" me.
5. How should I treat you when you are ill?
I will say this now - I am a lousy patient. I have always been the caretaker person - I am very good at taking care of others. I have had very little experience in the past with being taken care of and even though David has been valiantly trying to take care of me for 5 years now, I am still not used to it. So show concern, bring me some soup (I love matzoh ball soup) and maybe a silly magazine or book. And just keep me company.
6. What makes you happy that's in my power to grant you?
An expression of friendship. Show that you want to get to know me and I'll open up like a flower.
7. How would you like us to recognize your birthday?
See #6. Same thing applies. Maybe with a hug. I love to be remembered. I spent so many birthdays as a child and an adult alone and unremembered.
8. Are there any standing categories of presents that would be appropriate or unwelcome?
I really REALLY hate things like April Fool's gags, things that are intended to be jokes. Sorry, but it is just not my cup of tea.
9. Are there times of the year that are difficult for you? Please explain if you are comfortable.
Spring, which has always been one of my favorite times of year is hard for me now. I'll explain... My mom's birthday is March 6th, mine is April 17th and my dad's is May 4th. Their wedding anniversary is June 11th. My dad died on April 6, 2000 and my mom died on March 28, 2001. So many dates with memories - happy and sad - are all grouped together in a big clump. It gets a little easier with each passing year, but I usually get a bit melancholy in the Spring now. And a little too at Thanksgiving. That is my favorite holiday and I really miss my family at that time.
10. Are there important anniversaries in your life?
See #9 for several. And June 25, which is my anniversary with David.
11. How do I cater for you if you are visiting me?
I don't need catering. Just sit and talk.
12. If I want to contact you, how should I do it?
Call me! Or email... but I love hearing the voices of my friends. Emoticons are no substitute for real emotion.
Would love to see others' 'manuals' :)