Conversation with a co-worker.
A young woman I work with said she advised her younger sister to not tell her parents she is gay. My co-worker is in her twenties and a wonderful person. Seems she came out to her parents a few years ago. It did not go well. Now her sister is dealing with this as well. I feel so very sorry that people are still having to hide who they are and who they want to love. True kind and honest love is so very difficult to find.
I understand the parent might have problems accepting their child is gay. They might grieve about the life they had expected for their child. They might worry how others will treat their child. But that is the parents' issue. I wish they could set aside their own beliefs and just love their child as they are.
Many fear how others will react to the idea. Well, no one else's ideas or beliefs count unless you let them. My own mother didn't tell people when I got divorced. It just wasn't done in our family. I finally ended a unhappy relationship that cause me so much pain. My mother never divorced my father because of money. She would have had to divide up every thing with him if they divorced. My father did not support us. My mother went to work when I was three so we had a home and food. My father lived with us, but did not provide anything. When I was old enough to drive, my mother had to buy him a truck so we could use the car.
Sadly, I followed her example of holding onto a bad relationship. I made excuses for my husband and looked the other way far too often. He did provide for us, but treated me as less. Nothing I did was ever good enough. He cheated until he finally got a woman pregnant and she pushed him to divorce me. We had been married twenty years. I had left college when I got married because I helped him raise his two children from his first marriage. So I had little education and no money of my own. Now I advise young women to get an education and be able to support themselves before they decide to marry. I would tell that advice to any young person. Make a life of your own before you join your life to another. I would also tell parents to love their child as they are and rejoice that their child trusted them enough to share their lives with them.
I understand the parent might have problems accepting their child is gay. They might grieve about the life they had expected for their child. They might worry how others will treat their child. But that is the parents' issue. I wish they could set aside their own beliefs and just love their child as they are.
Many fear how others will react to the idea. Well, no one else's ideas or beliefs count unless you let them. My own mother didn't tell people when I got divorced. It just wasn't done in our family. I finally ended a unhappy relationship that cause me so much pain. My mother never divorced my father because of money. She would have had to divide up every thing with him if they divorced. My father did not support us. My mother went to work when I was three so we had a home and food. My father lived with us, but did not provide anything. When I was old enough to drive, my mother had to buy him a truck so we could use the car.
Sadly, I followed her example of holding onto a bad relationship. I made excuses for my husband and looked the other way far too often. He did provide for us, but treated me as less. Nothing I did was ever good enough. He cheated until he finally got a woman pregnant and she pushed him to divorce me. We had been married twenty years. I had left college when I got married because I helped him raise his two children from his first marriage. So I had little education and no money of my own. Now I advise young women to get an education and be able to support themselves before they decide to marry. I would tell that advice to any young person. Make a life of your own before you join your life to another. I would also tell parents to love their child as they are and rejoice that their child trusted them enough to share their lives with them.