(no subject)
I have been going to church for the past 3 weeks, which is an accomplishment for me. I didn't really grow up going to church, so I always feel kind of uncomfortable there, with all of the people who grew up that way. I have been going to a Baptist church...I had been trying to avoid the whole Southern Baptist thing, but one of my co-workers at my new job goes there, so I gave it a try. I go to the young married couples Sunday school, because that's where so goes, and the singles group meets at the time my friends are the second service. I finally went and bought a Bible, since the one I have is a Precious Moments one from when I was a kid. I got a book to help me understand it, too. I feel kind of weird going to church because, while I am a Christian and I believe in God, I don't really follow the Bible at all. I believe in gay marriage, I'm pro-choice, I'm just pretty liberal when it comes to that stuff, and that's where my crisis lies. The people that I hang out with from this church don't even drink. I feel like I don't belong...I feel like I can't say I'm a Christian and keep my other beliefs. They say you have to be saved and be Baptised to go to Heaven, and I'm neither, and that worries me, but at the same time I feel like it's a big decision that I'm not ready to make. This is one of the big problems in my life right now, and no one seems to understand. My friend Trudie, who grew up Southern Baptist, keeps telling me what I need to avoid doing or saying so I don't offend anyone, and when I told my sister I had been going to church se asked me when I started loving Jesus, as if it was a bad thing. I wish I knew some people who were having the same problem.