Week 10: Take a Hike
Sports Anchor, Lamar: And there you have it! The 2017 Candy Bracket is set! We have our Team 13 out getting reactions from the candy and the fans. Bruce?
Bruce: Lamar, I'm here outside Snickers headquarters, where it's silent. However, inside this building, well that's a different story.
[Tape runs of the Snickers organization watching the bracket reveal. Gasps and angry screams fill the room when Snickers is announced as a two seed.]
[Cut to taped interviews between Bruce and a member of the Snickers organization.]
Bruce: What was the first thought running through your head after the bracket announcement?
Member of Snickers Organization: It's a bunch of bull [bleep]. We work hard, we satisfy, and we're a two seed? Meanwhile, you got Hershey Kisses sitting at top in a region. It takes like ten of them to satisfy.
Bruce: Have you heard the Selection Committee's statement about nuts?
MoSO: What? Is it some type of conspiracy?
Bruce [reading from a piece of paper]: Due to the seriousness of peanut allergies, we have decided not to place a candy with nuts as a number one seed.
MoSO [snatches paper out of Bruce's hand, reads it, crumples it up, throws it on the floor]: Seriously? People's allergies have no impact on how good we are!
Bruce: What do you want to say to the Selection Committee?
MoSO [looks into the camera, and shakes his head]: I [pause] They [pause] You [Pause] [Heavy Sigh] Ugh. Take a hike. [Storms off]
[Back to the live shot with Bruce in front of the Snickers Headquarters.]
Bruce: As you can see it's an emotional night here at Snickers HQ. This is Bruce Hamilton, Team Thirteen. Back to the studio. Lamar?
Sports Anchor, Lamar: Thank you. Oh, and Bruce? Take a hike! [Laughs]