Why did I fall in Love with You?
Title: Why did I Fall In Love with You?
Author: KSaiko_No_Lady
Pairings: TaDaiki, TakaBu, YamaJima, InAru, and possibly HikaBu
Rate: PG-13 I guess it is..
Written: 8/10/08
Chapter Four. Takaki's and Yabu's point of view.
"Takaki, how have you been? I've missed you a lot. Sorry for leaving you. Forgive me?"
-Kota
I panicked and ran out of the room leaving Daiki by himself. What was I going to do? Why was Yabu, out of the sudden, e-mailing me?
I had to know why. Where's Yuto.... Gotta find him. He knows Yabu, right?
"Yuto!! There you are!" Yuto was walking down the hallway giggling with Yamada. He and Yamada needs to stop. If they like each other that much, then why don't they get married? "Yuto, come with me. We need to seriously talk. Right now!!" I grabbed his wrist and dragged him into an empty room. Before shutting the door, I say Yamada's horror-stuck face. Huh, did I do something wrong?
"Ne, Yuto, look at this!" I shoved my cell phone in front of his face and looked away. Surely something was up. It's been 7 months since Yabu left. Why is he contacting me now? Right after Daiki and I have committed love to each other?
Yuto rubbed his chin and thought for a moment. "May be Yabu's finally realizes that he needs you... Or may be he's in DEEP trouble and he just thought that he deserved this and would never forgive himself after what he did to you."
I thought about this carefully and then shook my head. "It can't possibly be. It wouldn't take Yabu that long to realize that. Anyways, that wasn't all that I came to you for. I... I kind of fell for Daiki... and we.. we just now had sex..." I blushed red-tomato and turned around.
Yuto twirled me back around and slapped my face. "WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU???!! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?! Do you know how much Yabu loved you? He gave up his career for you. To save your feelings from getting hurt! And you go doing it with someone else!"
My frustration meter went blasting and I blurted everything out. "WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH ME? You're asking what the heck is wrong with me??!! NO, IT'S NOT ME WHO'S WRONG, IT'S YABU!! He was the one who left me. Who left me heartbroken for 7 months!! He left me bleeding in pain and he didn't even come back! He never loved me, he never knew how much i loved him...
"Daiki was the only one there. He made me feel so happy, so warm... He loved me all this time and he stayed with me! Yabu didn't stay with me, though! He left me! HE WAS THE ONE WHO BETRAYED ME!! HE WAS THE ONE WHO DID EVERYTHING!!!"
Yuto stepped forward and grasped my arms. I was sobbing and throbbing with so much pain. Remembering everything we did together... Remember how many times I laughed with him..
"Takaki! Calm down! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Boku wa wakkanai. You never mentioned anything. Your face was always hard to read and... And you just didn't seem like you cared. I didn't know anything, Takaki! Gomenasai!" Yuto's face was so painful to look at. He looked like he'd just killed Yamada and he was scared about what would happen to him afterwards.
I stopped sobbing so hard and calmed down. I knew he was just a 15-year-old boy... But he seemed to know so much more than me. His relationship with Yamada was so much more... there was so much more love between them than anything else. I knew he knew this feeling. When he and Yamada would fight, this was how he felt. But much more sorry. So sorry he could kill himself if it wasn't for Yamada.
"No, I should be the one apologizing. Gomen, Yuto. I-I got carried away. I loved Yabu so much and he... he had to leave me.."
I knew that Yuto would never feel this way and I felt happy knowing that. I don't want him to experience this, ever.
"It's okay, Takaki. I'm sure he had a good reason. But I wonder why he would e-mail you, though." My ears perked up. Didn't he just give me good reasons why?
"I mean, if he realized that he needed you, then why didn't he come back? Why didn't he tell you in person?"
I thought about this. Why hadn't he come to me in person?
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I got off the bullet train and stalked to the exit. I knew that it was time. The e-mail I sent to Takaki earlier was so stupid. Why didn't I just come back and tell him in person! Why didn't I? I need a break. I need to come back. But I can't face him. I can't how he'll react to my coming back. I know I left him for 7 months with no one to go to... but I..I couldn't face Inoo either. I can't face anyone in JE anymore. I need to start over new and meet someone better.
Takaki was my heart. But Hikaru was my Angel. He fixed me when Shoon broke up with me. He was always there for me. Then he left. He left for Inoo. And then Takaki was there. He became my heart.... but I still longed for my Angel. I don't want to meet anyone better than them. They were the someone better for me. They were the keys to my heart. But, Hikaru was the special key. He was the shining sun and Takaki was the green grass.
Who am I going to rely on now? Now that I've started over, who am I to rely on?
The city was cold and dark. The stores were cheap and the parks were all violated. Cigarettes rested all over the streets and trash is now the new grass. Litter is everywhere, and I mean, everywhere. I knew i had to move sooner or later, but no one would expect me to live here. They would come looking for me in Osaka or something.
My apartment was only 3 stories high and I always use the stairs, so my waist is thinner now. Every store I went to, there was always something on TV saying that I was missing and if someone sees me call this number and earn 1 million yen. Yeah, whatever.
Many JE CDs are being sold here, but no sign of Hey!Say!JUMP's missing member. Not yet anyways.
I heard a familar voice and whipped around. There he was! My heart! My key! My green grass! My sexy panther, i mean, dancer!
There was Takaki screaming that they were lost and there was Hikaru...Holding hands with Inoo. Uh-oh, I better hide. Quick.
I slipped into the shadows of a grocery store and watched them closely. Why are they here?! Shouldn't they be debuting another song?! I thought that they would be more famous without me, but... it seems not. May be they do need me!
May be the whole accident was----"Yabu?" I froze and dropped the eggplant I was squeezing to death. "Yabu, is that you? Is that really you?" It was Okamoto. Oh no! He spotted me! "Yabu, it's you, right? It's really you, right?!"
Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw Takaki drop his bag and turn around. His face was full of shock and I pulled my hat down lower. My sleeves slipped over my fingers and I cleared my throat. In a deep voice, I boomed, "WHERE?! WHERE IS HE?! DID YOU JUST NOW SEE YABU?!! WHERE???!!"
I fantically turned in circles and call this out many times. By the time I stopped jumping, the members were all done running away, trying not to attract attention with a hobo like me. I knew I was hopeless, that someone would come for me soon. They would take me away to my unknown fate.
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"Ne, Takaki, you saw him didn't you?" Okamoto told everything to Chinen and Ryutaro and now they were pestering to me. "Takaki, you saw him, right? You saw Ya---"
"DON'T EVER MENTION HIS NAME EVER AGAIN!!" I yelled. Daiki squeezed my waist firmly and I laid my head on his. He knew that I still loved Yabu, but he didn't give up on me. He still wanted to hold onto me. He still loved me.
I wanted to forget Yabu and move on, but his face was on TV and advertisements and everywhere I looked I saw his face. What was this phase called? I'm not sure, but I couldn't forget Yabu. I would just feel happy without him whenever I was with Daiki. And that was often because Daiki was doing everything his can to make me happy. Not to mention he always tried doing perverted things.
His playful ear nips always made me squeal which caused a commotion of laughter and the way his arms are around me makes me feel so warm. So safe and little. But when it comes to evenings, my instincts are the one being perverts. I always have to remind myself that I'm the guy and Daiki's the girl.
Daiki says that girls can act naughty too and that just gets me even harder. How can Daiki act so natural? "It's because my love for you is stronger than steel and softer than fur," was Daiki's answer. We would giggle and peck each other afterwards and then it ended with both of us naked in bed.
I don't know how he manages to make me attracted to him, but it's working. Every day I feel my feelings for him getting stronger. I feel harder every time he smiles and every time he kisses me, i just have to grope his butt, making him squeal like a girl. I don't know what to do with him, except love him. It's my only choice.
And slowly I started forgetting his face. Then his name became a whisper to my ears. Our memories were fading and new ones were pouring in. I was smiling and laughing more. I was happy and I liked it.
I was starting to forget Yabu... Until Hey!Say!JUMP's special trip. We were supposed to go to Osaka and search for Yabu, but on the way, we went on the wrong path. Different directions were given, but ignored and here we ended up in this place. a place dirtier than public restrooms. @#$%!!#%^^%^ was the name of this dirty town and I knew Yabu would never go here.
That is until Okamoto whispered his name and pranced around, pointing like a fan. Yabu was in a grocery store looking at an eggplant. AN EGGPLANT??!!! Why eggplants? But was it really him? It certainly didn't sound like it. And he was giving away our disguises and there was already a crowd of girls forming. Yabu wouldn't do that... Would he?
I knew it wasn't him, but the thought kept nagging at me. It kept telling me it was him. I had to get out of here. I just had to.
As if he read my mind, Arioka stopped us from going any further. "I think we should leave. This place gives me the creeps." He tugged on my arm and hugged my waist, trying to get warmer. I hugged him back and skipped to the train station. I'm glad Arioka was here for me, "Dai-chan, Arigatou.." I kissed his forehead while he whispered back, "Gomenasai, Yuyaan."
And as we turned around to see if the rest of the members were following us, I ran smack into Yabu.
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I need to go away from this place. I need to run away again. It was all I could do to stop me from breaking down. I needed to go away. Farther away. May be I could even i could run away to America!!!
As I sprinted to the train station, I saw the members of Hey!Say!JUMP and stopped to see Takaki and Daiki hugging each other in front of me. Apparently, we accidentally bumped into each other.
Takaki was horror-struck and he grasped Daiki's shoulder even harder. I stepped back, shocked myself, that Takaki and Daiki were going out. May be they've even done it already. I felt a pang of jealousy shoot through me and i stopped breathing. The other members rushed to my side and they shared comments of relief.
Takaki and Daiki slipped further away and I could see Arioka's eyes, dark with anger, glaring at me. I knew that I was the target here. The main reason why Takaki was this way. And I also knew that I was too late. Takaki had found real love and I was left with nothing.
What an interesting fate. I felt the pain going through all my veins and it was harder for me to breathe but I managed.
I also noticed Hikaru and Inoo were drifting away as well. Hikaru was behind Inoo and Inoo was glaring dagger eyes at me.
He whispered without a sound, "You're dead meat if you ever go near Hikaru agian." More pressure was added to my body.
I had to get out of here. I looked around for an exit and just as I spotted one, Yamada was before me. "Don't think of running away again. You need to fix your mistakes and you need to now."
What am I supposed to do now?
To be continued....