blah blah blah
Yeah, the last weekend was kinda weird. I was at Rachel's enjoying a good nights sleep when I had the first nightmare that I've had in... ...... I can't even remember the last time I had one... but anyway! In the dream, my brother had a large pet snake and was trying to keep it from biting him. He got snapped a few times and thwacked it on the head to make it stop. Then, for no apparent reason, I'm holding the snake in my lap and it opens its jaw and slowly advances on me. It suddenly lunges at my arm and sinks sharp fangs into my flesh. The strike was so powerful that it shattered my arm and the snake thrashes about and rips off a huge chunk of my arm. I wake up in a panic and slap at my arm, emitting a frightened and strangled cry. T_T damnit. I hate nightmares. It came out of NOWHERE too.
Bluh. Stress is not cool. School isn't that bad right now, but it'll get worse when my papers start to sneak up. I have two more for ENG 223w and a term paper for ENG 204. Bliss hasn't even given us our assignment for it and it's due in two weeks. On top of that, we JUST turned in our midterm essays on Monday, so she has about 50-60, 3-4 page essays to grade and get back to us. If she can't get those back to us in a timely fashion, we have no realistic basis for how to form our papers. What did we do wrong? What could we do better? If she doesn't have those papers back, I'm going to haggle a later due date. I'm not going to let HER schedule dictate MY term paper grade. Yeah, classes are the least of my worries right now.
Yeah yeah I know, worry isn't useful, it's pointless, I should spend my energies on something more productive. I'm nervous though... I have a right to be. If things go badly, I have NO idea what I'm going to do. I talked with Wylie briefly (I use Wylie cause I know two Alex peoples) about his apartment, and apparently it cost him 495 a month. Single bedroom. 495. I pay 550 for a two bedroom duplex. I need to scout around more and check out my other options. So far the cheapest is 375. That's way outta my range. Next term, I'm probably going to sign up for a few more hours than I have now. I'll likely get 9 hours from the Fellow program if I can. I would like to. But even that won't keep me afloat if my rent goes up by over 100 dollars. Damn financial aid.... taking away my federal pell grant. That's 2100 bucks a year that I have to bum from outside sources. 700 a term! That's how I was able to save most of the money I made from the Writing Center. 700 for 12 weeks may not seem like much, but that's almost three months rent right there. I needed that so bad, and now Financial Aid expects me to get that money from my parents which, reluctantly, I'm having to do. Well.... kinda. They're just helping me pay rent at this point, 275 a month. I don't want to ask for any more than I need. But yeah, if David can't stay here, I don't know what I'm going to do. I talked to my mom and she said under NO circumstances am I to lose this place that I have. I heartily agree with her, but without a roommate, that's kind of hard. And I am not asking some random person around here to be my roommate. I couldn't trust a stranger like that. Not with how much valuable stuff I have. I can't pay the 550 myself. I can't even pay 275 myself -_- ARGH!
Today is the day, though, that is one of the deciding factors of what is to come. Ehh..... I'll just have to wait and see, but I HATE waiting for something like this. How screwed am I going to be next term? I want to know.
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Bluh. Stress is not cool. School isn't that bad right now, but it'll get worse when my papers start to sneak up. I have two more for ENG 223w and a term paper for ENG 204. Bliss hasn't even given us our assignment for it and it's due in two weeks. On top of that, we JUST turned in our midterm essays on Monday, so she has about 50-60, 3-4 page essays to grade and get back to us. If she can't get those back to us in a timely fashion, we have no realistic basis for how to form our papers. What did we do wrong? What could we do better? If she doesn't have those papers back, I'm going to haggle a later due date. I'm not going to let HER schedule dictate MY term paper grade. Yeah, classes are the least of my worries right now.
Yeah yeah I know, worry isn't useful, it's pointless, I should spend my energies on something more productive. I'm nervous though... I have a right to be. If things go badly, I have NO idea what I'm going to do. I talked with Wylie briefly (I use Wylie cause I know two Alex peoples) about his apartment, and apparently it cost him 495 a month. Single bedroom. 495. I pay 550 for a two bedroom duplex. I need to scout around more and check out my other options. So far the cheapest is 375. That's way outta my range. Next term, I'm probably going to sign up for a few more hours than I have now. I'll likely get 9 hours from the Fellow program if I can. I would like to. But even that won't keep me afloat if my rent goes up by over 100 dollars. Damn financial aid.... taking away my federal pell grant. That's 2100 bucks a year that I have to bum from outside sources. 700 a term! That's how I was able to save most of the money I made from the Writing Center. 700 for 12 weeks may not seem like much, but that's almost three months rent right there. I needed that so bad, and now Financial Aid expects me to get that money from my parents which, reluctantly, I'm having to do. Well.... kinda. They're just helping me pay rent at this point, 275 a month. I don't want to ask for any more than I need. But yeah, if David can't stay here, I don't know what I'm going to do. I talked to my mom and she said under NO circumstances am I to lose this place that I have. I heartily agree with her, but without a roommate, that's kind of hard. And I am not asking some random person around here to be my roommate. I couldn't trust a stranger like that. Not with how much valuable stuff I have. I can't pay the 550 myself. I can't even pay 275 myself -_- ARGH!
Today is the day, though, that is one of the deciding factors of what is to come. Ehh..... I'll just have to wait and see, but I HATE waiting for something like this. How screwed am I going to be next term? I want to know.
-end of transmission