Nov 14, 2005 13:59
My life is one big rollercoaster. Oh well been like that for a good eight years now, so I'm at the point where my feelings toward how I'm being treated is like "Whatever". But you know. I was lying on my bed bummed out because my father yelled at me over the stupidest shit and I realized that the next seven months just can not go by quick enough. Then I thought to myself that if I decided to stay here for senior year there would be no way in hell I could stand it. I've dealt and had to put up with this crazy crap for eight years and I'm not about to put up with it for another two years. Bull. I'll leave now. The opportunity arose and I'm taking it. If my sister has to take my mom to court or whatever, I'll do what I need to do in order to leave. I'm sick of being used and being treated like everything that goes wrong in the house is my fault. For once I want someone else to be blamed. I'm tired of having to go through my life not knowing when I'll cry next. Or being scared to go home, afraid to see what I have at store for me.
I'm leaving in seven months. The last day of school, I believe is May 28, 2006. somewhere around there. Once I have the OK from my father to move up to North Carolina, I'm gone. I know it'll be hard and such but the bad outweighs the good and it's time to leave it all behind and start a new. I don't think I'll even be down here for my 17th birthday party. But to all my friends I'll throw a good bye early birthday just for you all...and me. lol. Anyways enough rant for today. By tomorrow...or in three hours I'll be smiling again and be back to my cheerful self. And to those of you who think that my decision on moving is to rash and hurried in. Know this...it's not. Ask yourself this. If you had the chance to leave everything bad behind and start a new life where you know it will be better would you take it? Even if it means leaving behind loved ones and friends? Try living in my shoes for a few days and feel what I feel, then we'll talk.
Later.