(no subject)
As I sit here, cold cup of coffee in front of me, endless nurturing cigerette between my lips, debating between eyeliner and no makeup at all, and whether or not my manager will make fun of me for wearing a pair of big fluffy uggs, I think about being fat and how i shoudl walk to work in the snow and ice because i am fat, I click the images of the girls I ll never be and I push the thoughts that others say to me to the back of my brain pray they fall out my right ear.
Sometimes you get sick of the reassurances and just once, you want to scream back , I dont believe you are full of shit and are only saying this out of urge for comforting and reassuring me with love. The love I dont doubt, nor the good intentions. But,I'm just not sure how much more I can take.
I had an encounter with spinach aspargus cappelletti last night that left me swirling with thoughts. I hate how one insignifcent event can send you whirling in circles again, confused about what you thought you were so certain and decided about.
I dont want to go to work . I want to be enveloped in b lankets and vodka in my left hand . I want to stay in the safety and warmth of my apartment. UGh
Sometimes you get sick of the reassurances and just once, you want to scream back , I dont believe you are full of shit and are only saying this out of urge for comforting and reassuring me with love. The love I dont doubt, nor the good intentions. But,I'm just not sure how much more I can take.
I had an encounter with spinach aspargus cappelletti last night that left me swirling with thoughts. I hate how one insignifcent event can send you whirling in circles again, confused about what you thought you were so certain and decided about.
I dont want to go to work . I want to be enveloped in b lankets and vodka in my left hand . I want to stay in the safety and warmth of my apartment. UGh