(no subject)
-sigh-
In an emotional slump again. I'm overwhlemed.
Too much responsibility at home.
Too much stress at work, over details I have no say or control over, and situations that likely aren't going to get any better, at least not until sometime in January.
Combination of said things is killing me.
Emotionally, I can't cope any longer with me working FT, busting my ass in a rough physically demanding job, on overnight shift so my whole daily schedule is messed up from what it naturally is, while my husband makes more per hour than I do at a fairly easy job, which happens to be one of my dream jobs. If things were in balance with home/job responsibilities so that we shared actual responsibility, it'd be alright I guess, but home stuff isn't nearly in balance either. Either I do it, or I have to oversee him do it. There's a list of daily stuff and who's supposed to do it. He offers to help with mine when I'm extra stressed from work, and I appreciate it, but then neglects his in response, and ends up adding more stress to the situation than there would have been in the first place had he just let me take care of it.
Add in the non-existant time together and non-existant sex life, and yeh. On a personal level, i'm not happy at all with where I am in life right now.
And I have the overwhelming urge to get in the car, and drive, and not look back.
I just want to give up and start all over again.
I want to run.
In an emotional slump again. I'm overwhlemed.
Too much responsibility at home.
Too much stress at work, over details I have no say or control over, and situations that likely aren't going to get any better, at least not until sometime in January.
Combination of said things is killing me.
Emotionally, I can't cope any longer with me working FT, busting my ass in a rough physically demanding job, on overnight shift so my whole daily schedule is messed up from what it naturally is, while my husband makes more per hour than I do at a fairly easy job, which happens to be one of my dream jobs. If things were in balance with home/job responsibilities so that we shared actual responsibility, it'd be alright I guess, but home stuff isn't nearly in balance either. Either I do it, or I have to oversee him do it. There's a list of daily stuff and who's supposed to do it. He offers to help with mine when I'm extra stressed from work, and I appreciate it, but then neglects his in response, and ends up adding more stress to the situation than there would have been in the first place had he just let me take care of it.
Add in the non-existant time together and non-existant sex life, and yeh. On a personal level, i'm not happy at all with where I am in life right now.
And I have the overwhelming urge to get in the car, and drive, and not look back.
I just want to give up and start all over again.
I want to run.