Evil!Bagel of Doom
I haven't updated in a few days. I've been commenting and reading and attempting to write and I just keep getting distracted. Also, I really don't have anything even remotely exciting to say about the past few days. Earlier today I had a witty anecdote about a fight I had with a bagel half planned out in my head, but again, I got distracted. Basically, our (probably-never-been-sharpened) bread knife got stuck in the apparently super-powered 9-grain bagel (I'm assuming the number of grains directly influences the strength of the bagel), which resulted in me whacking the thing repeatedly against the counter until the knife had gone all the way through. This was very loud and rather messy, as grains of various types were flung in all directions with each impact. It did work, though, and was honestly incredibly entertaining once I got into it. As soon as it was cleaved in two and lightly toasted, I felt obligated to use up some of this vegetable cream cheese my roommate had mistakenly purchased and offered to me. Why is it that people assume that if you're a vegetarian, you must want to eat vegetables ALL THE TIME!? I don't! I love vegetables, but . . . just, no. Anyway, I'm a plain cream cheese kind of girl. I don't like little chunks of all kinds of weird crap in it, I just want the cheese (no subtext of any kind intended - I really am just talking about cream cheese).
The fucking thing actually tasted pretty damn good.
The fucking thing actually tasted pretty damn good.