wow seriously
finding it hard to concentrate...hard to think... hard to talk to people. I am not looking forward to this evening when emily and i talk about what was said between her and her father. I am infact terrified. I am waiting for emily to get to her mandatory meeting..... jac arrived and she didnt... great. I dont know why i worry so much.. but i do. I am a ball of never ending nerves. James' mom kinda upset me last night.. she was right. I am using my bipolar disorder as an excuse to not control myself. I am trying. Its hard. I can only control myself to a certain extent. When i am mad i dont stop my mouth. I just... shoot it off. I need a freaking speed bump. I want to just be able to calm down when i feel myself get upset. I dont know what to do.