Rambling...

[krizak]

I seriously don't know what to do.

When I was in high school, I had a nice little group of friends, built up along a series of various aquaintances; we actually all went to four different high schools, and it was the connections of various folks that brought us together. Our little group had a lot of laughs together, and made those years memorable.

Comments

[tenshi_kain]

Couldn't all this depression and furor be resolved with some calm discussion and mutual apologies? @_@

[vespawoman]

Seriously. I know we're all a bunch of nerds and all, but geez...

[krizak]

What am I supposed to say? "I'm sorry I think your tournament was as terrible and self-involved as Survivor XIV"? "I'm sorry your terrible attitude drove away one of my best friends"? "I'm sorry you learned nothing from Written in the Stars"? "I'm sorry you keep sniping at me completely randomly"? Seriously, TK, how am I supposed to engage Luna in a calm discussion? How am supposed to apologize when she won't apologize for anything?

[grayfox]

Well, she HAS apologized for many of RFTA's shortcomings, actually. Several times. In any event, you approach that whole thing too much like you did nothing wrong either. I think TK may have meant apologizes on your end too - not everything has to start ith someone else. Take initiative this time. After all, while I was privy to it, part of the reason Luna is taking s many snipes at you lately probably has something to do with the intentional trolling of round one. Start by apologizing for that, and hopefully it leads to a calmer discussion (...well, that's kinda a longshot considering the parties involved on both ends, no offense, Krizak), and things get better form there. That's the ideal, at least.

As for apologies on my end, I tried once, and it was poorly received enough to convince me that it wasn't worth trying again or a while ...though I'm genuinely unsure of what I have left to apologize for, though there's probably something. I might try again soon, but I doubt it'd change much in regards to me and RI as a whole.

[tenshi_kain]

I might try again soon, but I doubt it'd change much in regards to me and RI as a whole.

Drew, man - you have to lose this attitude on RI.

I've heard it from various people for years; "I'm not having fun in RI", "I don't have anything to say", "I'm not happy with the person I'm becoming in RI."

That's not like you. That's something Tenk would say, and it's a rotten lie. RI is a chatroom, not the goddamn Dark Side of the Force. If you have a problem with the kind of person you're becoming, the responsibility for that does not come from the amount of time you spend in a chatroom. And the worst thing you can do to yourself in a situation like that is to divorce yourself from a circle of friends

[vespawoman]

This, a whole hell of a lot of this.

[thirdtwin]

Although I agree with the spirit of TK's post here and must hold that you should listen to him, I'm going to have to raise a mild objection to--well, first I'd like to peel back the hyperbole a little bit, because I don't think anybody's sincerely maintaining that RI has created a voodoo-like hold on people that's slowly turning them evil (and yes, it was obviously hyperbolic but the point of this post I'm making is to address the conceptions that may lie beneath the muff). Certainly nobody is kicking puppies because they go to RI in any case

[vespawoman]

Poison = Tourneys. I'm believer of this. Until people can grow up and handle things like this in an adult manner, I don't think the stressor (poison) will go away. I think that's the point TK was getting at.

I also believe stress is caused 99.9% by ourselves. Like you said in your second comment, your stress was caused because you thought everyone hated you, which is totally not the case then or now. It's all about perception.

[thirdtwin]

Well, if that's what you think. Perception is easy to change for some people and harder for some other people. I'm sure a lot of people can't suddenly decide, for instance, to perceive bananas as tasty if they've hated bananas for most of their lives.

[tenshi_kain]

It's very capable of being a stressful place when so many people bring their own stress to it. And I'm totally down with people taking a break from RI for a while, especially if it starts to be something they prioritize in day-to-day life. It's just a chatroom. I've always likened it in my mind to a bar or a lunch table, and neither is something to build your daily activities around.

But too often, people use that line or its kin to shift responsibility for their own bad attitudes away from themselves. I especially hate when somebody says "It's just a bad environment."

Sudan after dusk is a bad environment. RI is an IRC channel where, at most, you may get into a fight over how we do roleplaying - something I've always thought could easily be avoided with at least a temporary Control->Ignore.

[vespawoman]

Well, stress and bananas are kinda hard to relate to one another, but I think Teek, yet again, hit the nail on the head.

Seriously, all my stress is mostly caused by myself and only a very small portion of it is outside forces.

[thirdtwin]

Didn't you hear? I'm all about tangential connections! (b")b

[thirdtwin]

The reason I say this, incidentally, is because I didn't like the person I was becoming in RI either

[tenshi_kain]

"I'm sorry I deliberately tried to mess with your opening round; while I think what I did with Helmar's character was totally logical, it would've been good form to ask how you, the host, felt about it first. And I'm sorry I exploded at you and your tournament in public, both in chat and on the board. Maybe I should've just realized that it wasn't going to be the kind of overstory I go for, accepted the impact of the hosting setbacks on the story and the game, shrugged it off, and focused on having fun with the rest of the sponsors.

But I'm tired of the constant backhanded remarks at me, and I don't think you handled what sponsor dissent there was very professionally, and you made me feel like it didn't matter that I wasn't having fun. I'm sorry I lost my temper and hurt your feelings, but you should know I didn't come out untouched either. We've known each other a long time - let's put this behind us and try again, okay?"

Might be a start?