Happier than last week
well it is only Wed and I feel like this week has been much more of and improvment than last week. I must say last week was one of the harder weeks I've had to go thru. It also didn't help that I was far far away from my family. Thats all I need right now is my family. I miss them. Before i left school I didn't want to go home but now I really do. They are the only people who can truly understand what things we are going through because we are going through them together. Please pray for the Cabrera family. There are far too much things happening to us at once.
I'm going home on saturday. That should be good. I've been so caught up with school lately that I haven't had much time to think of anything else. but i have been doing a lot of reevaluating....
I love the group of friends I have. Its so different from last year but I truly do miss our small group from last year. Last year I made many close ties with people like Matt and Abby. I miss having a best friend. I miss being able to just lay around with someone and watch a movie or just be silly even if it is just 2 or 3 people. I don't really want a boyfriend for various reasons but it would be nice to have a close guy friend to be chill with. I have like 2 guy friends. Sometimes its just nice to talk to boys. It truly is a differnt conversation with them. I don't have time for a serious boyfriend. But I could make time for a very casual close friendship with a boy. I need to meet more guys. And not at parties. I'm sick of guys hitting on me that only have one thing on mind. I want someone genuine.
Besides all that I am happy with the way things are going. I mean sure I am losing closer contact with people I used to be super close with but sometimes schedules clash or sometimes its hard to be close to someone whom you have had such a past with. you can't be best friends with an ex serious boyfriend.. i learned that the hard way. Things are ok the way they are. I just don't care as much. And it works out to be ok.
oh something that came up in a lunch conversation... I have never been on a real date with someone who wasn't my boyfriend. So hopefully I can experience the wonderful world of dating soon. I wonder what it is like! hehe.. its been 3+ months... am I seriously that ugly and fat? There has to be SOMEONE!
"well.. umm thanks for your time"