*sigh*
I have SEVER self-confidence issues, but I have to blame that on every asshole that I've gone to school with over the last 18 years. but maybe its my own fault for listening to them.
I never talk about this, and I try not to think about it, but some times it relaly bothers me. This is more personal than I usually get on Livejournal, so bear with me.
This kid came into the store today, and he wound up waiting for like 40 minutes to get his like for like phone swapped. And he started talking to me, like just making conversation in general... We were talking and laughing and whatnot, and the whole time I'm like... why is this kid talking to me? Not that I didn't want to talk to him, I did, its just... noone ever talks to me. No one ever notices me or even goes out of their way to notice me. It was just weird having attention I guess... does that make any sence? Like, strangers never talk to me, like ever. The only people I ever meet are friends of friends. I haven't met at genuinely new person in... years.
I guess I just feel like it shouldn't have felt as weird as it did to talk to someone. I don't know.
And I think a lot of it goes back to the assholes I went to middle school with (the same ones who were assholes in high schooll). I always felt like the fat girl that noone wanted to associate with. But then at the Daley everything was better. But even then there was no escaping it. Kids are mean, REALLY REALLY mean. And you probably never think of it but just calling someone a name can really bug them... indefinately. And although you might not even realise that it bothers them, its never to late to appologise.
I mean if those jerks from middleschool came up and appologised to me I would probably want to deck them. Not because I don't want to accept their appology, but because they're STILL the same immature assholes and they haven't grown up a smidge. But if they proved sincere, I would probably accect. that's the kids that teased me.
So the moral of my big sob story is not that I want your pity of your sympathy, I just want to put this out there. More for me than anyone else.
If you ever teased someone (as a kid, I say alls fair in love and high school, after that the emotional scarring is minimal...) appologise to them, because it can really help.
I dunno. I think I'm losing it.
Comment as needed.
Bring to a boil, and reduce heat.
Let sit for 2 hours, and update with a side of parsley.
I never talk about this, and I try not to think about it, but some times it relaly bothers me. This is more personal than I usually get on Livejournal, so bear with me.
This kid came into the store today, and he wound up waiting for like 40 minutes to get his like for like phone swapped. And he started talking to me, like just making conversation in general... We were talking and laughing and whatnot, and the whole time I'm like... why is this kid talking to me? Not that I didn't want to talk to him, I did, its just... noone ever talks to me. No one ever notices me or even goes out of their way to notice me. It was just weird having attention I guess... does that make any sence? Like, strangers never talk to me, like ever. The only people I ever meet are friends of friends. I haven't met at genuinely new person in... years.
I guess I just feel like it shouldn't have felt as weird as it did to talk to someone. I don't know.
And I think a lot of it goes back to the assholes I went to middle school with (the same ones who were assholes in high schooll). I always felt like the fat girl that noone wanted to associate with. But then at the Daley everything was better. But even then there was no escaping it. Kids are mean, REALLY REALLY mean. And you probably never think of it but just calling someone a name can really bug them... indefinately. And although you might not even realise that it bothers them, its never to late to appologise.
I mean if those jerks from middleschool came up and appologised to me I would probably want to deck them. Not because I don't want to accept their appology, but because they're STILL the same immature assholes and they haven't grown up a smidge. But if they proved sincere, I would probably accect. that's the kids that teased me.
So the moral of my big sob story is not that I want your pity of your sympathy, I just want to put this out there. More for me than anyone else.
If you ever teased someone (as a kid, I say alls fair in love and high school, after that the emotional scarring is minimal...) appologise to them, because it can really help.
I dunno. I think I'm losing it.
Comment as needed.
Bring to a boil, and reduce heat.
Let sit for 2 hours, and update with a side of parsley.