It may not be goodbye but it sure does feel like it. (Andrew/Jesse)
Title: It may not be goodbye but it sure does feel like it.
Rating: PG
Pairing: Andrew/Jesse
Word count: ~700
Summary: tsn_kinkmeme: "If this is heaven or if it's just a warning, say you will stay with me, even if it's just till morning. If this is over, then why is it so hard? Just say you will stay with me, one more night." Until Morning by Dashboard Confessional. Do whatever you will with it.
Disclaimer: Fiction, not getting paid, don't know or own the people.
“Shh, calm down,” Andrew whispered, face in Jesse’s hair and eyes closed as he held the shorter man against his chest.
Arms tightening around Andrew’s waist, Jesse sobbed into Andrew’s shirt. When he first met Andrew, he never could have imagined how difficult their departure months later would be. He wasn’t losing just a co-worker or roommate but a best friend. Andrew was the best friend Jesse had waited his entire life for. They brought out the best in each other and got through the worst together. Jesse had feelings for Andrew that he never had before and he loved what they had. Being apart and going back to a different reality was something Jesse didn’t want to do.
They were standing in the middle of the condo they shared during shooting, which was now empty and showed no sign that they were there except for a little burn from Andrew’s lighter when Jesse reenacted a treasure hunt he went on when he was younger. Jesse’s taxi to the airport was waiting outside, filled with his belongings.
Andrew rubbed Jesse’s back and swayed them back and forth slowly. He was staying in California while Jesse was going back to New York and the fact it was on the other side of the country hadn’t exactly hit him yet. They had to do reshoots, voiceovers, and the promotional tour still so he was going to see Jesse in a couple weeks anyway. He knew, though, that those weeks were going to pass by slowly and he was going to miss Jesse and his company a lot.
Andrew kissed the top of Jesse’s head. “I’ll be seeing you soon, alright? It’s going to be fine.”
“Shut up, no it won’t.” Jesse wiped the back of his hand under his eyes and looked up at Andrew.
“I don’t want to be alone again. I don’t want to be without you anymore.”
Andrew pressed his forehead against Jesse’s. Looking into Jesse’s eyes made him want to cry because he knew that Jesse meant everything he was saying with all of his heart. That’s how Jesse was and Andrew loved it. He was going to miss being with him constantly.
“Life was so…dull and pointless before you, it really was.” Jesse sniffed and licked his lips.
“You made it better- You made me better. You…made me happy.”
“You can stay if you want.”
Jesse’s eyes grew wide.
Andrew nodded, sliding his hands up the back of Jesse’s shirt to rub small circles on his lower back. “You don’t have to go back. You can stay with me for a couple days and if you like it, we can be roomies again.”
Jesse seriously considered the offer but not for long because he knew that it couldn’t happen. New York was his home, it always would be, and he couldn’t just leave it behind because of Andrew. He loved Andrew and wanted to be with him forever, but that forever would have to be in New York and he already knew that Andrew wasn’t willing to relocate.
“Please?” Andrew begged quietly and softly, quickly kissed Jesse. “Please, you don’t need to go.”
Eyes closed, Jesse shook his head. “I do need to.”
Andrew’s eyes finally welled up and the distance fact settled in. He wasn’t going to be able to hug Jesse anymore. He wasn’t going to be able to be there for him when he had his fragile emotional moments. He wasn’t going to be able to make Jesse’s world all better without trying and it killed him.
“We can video chat, right? So I can…see you and pretend that you’re there.”
Hands smoothing over Jesse’s hair, Andrew nodded and kissed him again. “Of course. Of course we will. The second you land, call me and we’ll do it.”
“Perfect.”
The taxi honked from outside and Jesse jumped a little, taking a step away from Andrew and staring at the ground. “I guess I’ll see you later.”
“Yes you will.”
Andrew put a hand on Jesse’s cheek and rubbed his thumb over Jesse’s jaw right before Jesse turned and walked out the door, not looking back. Andrew went to the window, staring after Jesse longingly until he got into the taxi, which took off a second after the door shut.
He pressed his fingers against the window and mumbled sadly, “I’ll see you.”
Rating: PG
Pairing: Andrew/Jesse
Word count: ~700
Summary: tsn_kinkmeme: "If this is heaven or if it's just a warning, say you will stay with me, even if it's just till morning. If this is over, then why is it so hard? Just say you will stay with me, one more night." Until Morning by Dashboard Confessional. Do whatever you will with it.
Disclaimer: Fiction, not getting paid, don't know or own the people.
“Shh, calm down,” Andrew whispered, face in Jesse’s hair and eyes closed as he held the shorter man against his chest.
Arms tightening around Andrew’s waist, Jesse sobbed into Andrew’s shirt. When he first met Andrew, he never could have imagined how difficult their departure months later would be. He wasn’t losing just a co-worker or roommate but a best friend. Andrew was the best friend Jesse had waited his entire life for. They brought out the best in each other and got through the worst together. Jesse had feelings for Andrew that he never had before and he loved what they had. Being apart and going back to a different reality was something Jesse didn’t want to do.
They were standing in the middle of the condo they shared during shooting, which was now empty and showed no sign that they were there except for a little burn from Andrew’s lighter when Jesse reenacted a treasure hunt he went on when he was younger. Jesse’s taxi to the airport was waiting outside, filled with his belongings.
Andrew rubbed Jesse’s back and swayed them back and forth slowly. He was staying in California while Jesse was going back to New York and the fact it was on the other side of the country hadn’t exactly hit him yet. They had to do reshoots, voiceovers, and the promotional tour still so he was going to see Jesse in a couple weeks anyway. He knew, though, that those weeks were going to pass by slowly and he was going to miss Jesse and his company a lot.
Andrew kissed the top of Jesse’s head. “I’ll be seeing you soon, alright? It’s going to be fine.”
“Shut up, no it won’t.” Jesse wiped the back of his hand under his eyes and looked up at Andrew.
“I don’t want to be alone again. I don’t want to be without you anymore.”
Andrew pressed his forehead against Jesse’s. Looking into Jesse’s eyes made him want to cry because he knew that Jesse meant everything he was saying with all of his heart. That’s how Jesse was and Andrew loved it. He was going to miss being with him constantly.
“Life was so…dull and pointless before you, it really was.” Jesse sniffed and licked his lips.
“You made it better- You made me better. You…made me happy.”
“You can stay if you want.”
Jesse’s eyes grew wide.
Andrew nodded, sliding his hands up the back of Jesse’s shirt to rub small circles on his lower back. “You don’t have to go back. You can stay with me for a couple days and if you like it, we can be roomies again.”
Jesse seriously considered the offer but not for long because he knew that it couldn’t happen. New York was his home, it always would be, and he couldn’t just leave it behind because of Andrew. He loved Andrew and wanted to be with him forever, but that forever would have to be in New York and he already knew that Andrew wasn’t willing to relocate.
“Please?” Andrew begged quietly and softly, quickly kissed Jesse. “Please, you don’t need to go.”
Eyes closed, Jesse shook his head. “I do need to.”
Andrew’s eyes finally welled up and the distance fact settled in. He wasn’t going to be able to hug Jesse anymore. He wasn’t going to be able to be there for him when he had his fragile emotional moments. He wasn’t going to be able to make Jesse’s world all better without trying and it killed him.
“We can video chat, right? So I can…see you and pretend that you’re there.”
Hands smoothing over Jesse’s hair, Andrew nodded and kissed him again. “Of course. Of course we will. The second you land, call me and we’ll do it.”
“Perfect.”
The taxi honked from outside and Jesse jumped a little, taking a step away from Andrew and staring at the ground. “I guess I’ll see you later.”
“Yes you will.”
Andrew put a hand on Jesse’s cheek and rubbed his thumb over Jesse’s jaw right before Jesse turned and walked out the door, not looking back. Andrew went to the window, staring after Jesse longingly until he got into the taxi, which took off a second after the door shut.
He pressed his fingers against the window and mumbled sadly, “I’ll see you.”