"onward, christian--- er, *kristen* sooo-oh-oh-oldier...."
and so begins another week at lmu. "let's carpe the shit out of this diem, people!!"
yesterday was quite a day for austin and I. quite a day indeed. I miss him so much already.
I'm worried about the situation with his dad. he's staying with austin until he gets his own place, and it seems he's fallen off the wagon and has begun drinking again. and now he's in a house where there's gallons of leftover beer from the kegger on friday night. can that be anymore stressful, for either austin or his dad? the whole thing just concerns me so much. I really hope something works out for the better...
so the party all in all was fun, even if julie did come and there was too much beer. I'm still bummed that my present thing hasn't worked out yet....I owe him something, be it money or something else. we'll have to work on that later.
in the meantime, I'm trying to figure out something wonderful to do for him for our anniversary in november (it'll be 10 months as of tomorrow). I think we should take a trip. but I also want to get him something nice...something that'll really surprise him.
hmmm. *ponders*
I had such an awful nightmare last night. I think it was influenced by that bastard at fat-pie.com, those goddamned milkman and saladfinger cartoons.
I was in a bedroom, like a fancy old fashioned one, kinda looked like it was from the early 1900s. I was in front of a large dresser with a mirror on top of it... I forget the name...vanity table. I was going through a large box, like a costume box, looking for items I could make art with or keep for myself. I looked between the box and the dresser and found a naked man's dead body lying on his side, his back towards me. I kinda shrugged it off...maybe thinking the body was the man who owned the room, even though it all seemed pretty feminine. I pulled out an old, kinda scary looking teddy bear from the box and set it on the dresser to admire. I decided I needed to use this bear for something artistic. I shoved the box out of the way so that the body was in front of me. without even thinking, or maybe thinking that I needed to dispose of the body somehow, I withdrew a knife from thin air and quickly sliced a line all the way across the man's back, from tailbone to neck. the line was thin, but his skin bulged up underneath, as if I had scraped the surface of a balloon, and the contents underneath were about to expell. I walked to the end of the bedroom and blood burst out of the man's back, splattering all over, sort of like in a circle, going in directions that are impossible by laws of gravity. I walked forward and looked at the bear, with blood splattered all over it, and thought it looked better.
but, the whole time, my real consciousness, the one that kept telling me to wake up, was terrified. I finally jerked myself out of the dream and woke up, and I was so frightened by it, I almost wanted to wake up daisy to talk to her. it was extremely disturbing. I got up to the bathroom and spalashed water on my face to cool me down some, to cleanse me of the evil. I wished so bad that I had austin next to me. I was frightened and lonely.
I don't usually have nightmares. my dreams lately have been really vivid lately, though... I guess I'm reaching rem sleep easier these days, because of being tired for so long. the next time I have a nightmare, it better be when I'm with austin... I wanted nothing more than to have him stroke my head and tell me it was all right.
*shudder*
anyway.
I'm happy with my pink hair. hopefully, soon mary and I will get together to take pictures. I wanna get my film developed so badly.
also, reason #1 why september 28 rocks: eternal sunshine on dvd!!!
and now, reason #2.... a new 2-disc phil collins love song compilation album!!! EEEEEEEE!!!!
I shall have to save my money. come to me, work study....
now off to a class I hate, with an ignorant, yet somehow accomplished, professor. what a paradox.
yesterday was quite a day for austin and I. quite a day indeed. I miss him so much already.
I'm worried about the situation with his dad. he's staying with austin until he gets his own place, and it seems he's fallen off the wagon and has begun drinking again. and now he's in a house where there's gallons of leftover beer from the kegger on friday night. can that be anymore stressful, for either austin or his dad? the whole thing just concerns me so much. I really hope something works out for the better...
so the party all in all was fun, even if julie did come and there was too much beer. I'm still bummed that my present thing hasn't worked out yet....I owe him something, be it money or something else. we'll have to work on that later.
in the meantime, I'm trying to figure out something wonderful to do for him for our anniversary in november (it'll be 10 months as of tomorrow). I think we should take a trip. but I also want to get him something nice...something that'll really surprise him.
hmmm. *ponders*
I had such an awful nightmare last night. I think it was influenced by that bastard at fat-pie.com, those goddamned milkman and saladfinger cartoons.
I was in a bedroom, like a fancy old fashioned one, kinda looked like it was from the early 1900s. I was in front of a large dresser with a mirror on top of it... I forget the name...vanity table. I was going through a large box, like a costume box, looking for items I could make art with or keep for myself. I looked between the box and the dresser and found a naked man's dead body lying on his side, his back towards me. I kinda shrugged it off...maybe thinking the body was the man who owned the room, even though it all seemed pretty feminine. I pulled out an old, kinda scary looking teddy bear from the box and set it on the dresser to admire. I decided I needed to use this bear for something artistic. I shoved the box out of the way so that the body was in front of me. without even thinking, or maybe thinking that I needed to dispose of the body somehow, I withdrew a knife from thin air and quickly sliced a line all the way across the man's back, from tailbone to neck. the line was thin, but his skin bulged up underneath, as if I had scraped the surface of a balloon, and the contents underneath were about to expell. I walked to the end of the bedroom and blood burst out of the man's back, splattering all over, sort of like in a circle, going in directions that are impossible by laws of gravity. I walked forward and looked at the bear, with blood splattered all over it, and thought it looked better.
but, the whole time, my real consciousness, the one that kept telling me to wake up, was terrified. I finally jerked myself out of the dream and woke up, and I was so frightened by it, I almost wanted to wake up daisy to talk to her. it was extremely disturbing. I got up to the bathroom and spalashed water on my face to cool me down some, to cleanse me of the evil. I wished so bad that I had austin next to me. I was frightened and lonely.
I don't usually have nightmares. my dreams lately have been really vivid lately, though... I guess I'm reaching rem sleep easier these days, because of being tired for so long. the next time I have a nightmare, it better be when I'm with austin... I wanted nothing more than to have him stroke my head and tell me it was all right.
*shudder*
anyway.
I'm happy with my pink hair. hopefully, soon mary and I will get together to take pictures. I wanna get my film developed so badly.
also, reason #1 why september 28 rocks: eternal sunshine on dvd!!!
and now, reason #2.... a new 2-disc phil collins love song compilation album!!! EEEEEEEE!!!!
I shall have to save my money. come to me, work study....
now off to a class I hate, with an ignorant, yet somehow accomplished, professor. what a paradox.