the crap saga, part deux
okay. ::gets a slight twitch in her eye:: I will do my best to recount the remaining events of yesterday now, as I struggle to resist my urge to jump out the window as my roommate watches newlyweds and jessica simpsons "oh my gaaawwwddd!!"s her way into a deeper spot in my personal hell.
ANYWAY!!
so, the pen. I find a bathroom to scrub most of the ink off, but even today, there is still some of it deeply wedged into the corner of my nails.
might I add, since austin was supposed to come visit me yesterday, and come to diner with me tonight, we had to cancel our date for last night because it's too hard for him to make the pilgrimage out here three nights in a row (last night, tonight's dinner, and tomorrow to pick me up). so my a-kun went bye bye and went to work as I died a little more inside with each agonizing second of my day.
to get back to school, I was relying on the lion express shuttle. I called the info hotline for the thing and the guy told me I could expect it outside of the roaster's chicken place around 5:25. well, I go out in front of the chicken place at 5:15ish, not wanting to miss it at any costs. there's a little covering over the place to keep me dry, but it's raining and blowing wind so hard that I still can't keep dry. and, the sidewalk is so small, and the fucking suvs are driving by so fast, that I get splashed everytime someone drives by.
a man in a leather trenchcoat walks by me and points at my sandal-clad feet. "wrong shoes," he says cutely. I summon all my lasting energy to fight the urge to chase him down and pummle him with my shopping bags.
40 minutes passes before the express arrives. I'm soaked to the bone. so when I get dropped off at school, and walk the 8-minute walk from the stop to my room, I'm used to being dripping wet. rain trickles down my forehead and my toes have lost all the feeling in them.
I slop into my room and have a little down time before going to the later drawing class. my hair has puffed up and has taken the form of a dead poodle crouched on my head.
when I went to drawing, drew was there. drew is the italian exchange student who's reaaally popular with the ladies. he's an animation major and is/was in my computer class.
he came and said hi to me. he asked me why I wasn't in animation that day. I told him I withdrew. and then, all the crap festering within me kinda boiled over, and instead of opening a can of whoopass on something, my eyes started to well. I tried to hide it from drew, but he saw and leaned in to give me a hug. I actually felt really good to be hugged, be it from drew or a professor or a janitor. it meant someone was on my side, hoping for things to look up.
he tried giving me a pep talk about how he could help me with the film, how not all hope was lost. it was really sweet. I tried explaining to him what was done was done, I was out of the class, but I appreciated his help and kindness.
then, he insisted on taking me to a movie after class. "you need to do something fun," he said. "I've been able to tell that for awhile. and I want to take you out."
my jaw kinda dropped and I didn't know what to think. drew's a real friendly guy, but when do you know when friendliness stops and something else begins?
he asked me if I was 21 so he could take me to a bar. then he invited me to his apartment so he could cook me dinner. (he's a fabulous cook and baker. must be the italian in him. gotta love those people!) but I felt kinda uncomfortable about it.
then, ashley asked me if she could come over and type something on my compy after class, so I said sure. when I told drew, it was decided the 3 of us would trek to my place and hang.
we stomped through the rain, which was pouring in buckets. drew ordered pizza, which he insisted to pay for. as ashley typed, he and I watched some anime (which he's a big fan of) and adult swim. around midnight, I was really tired, and kinda just wanted to rest. plus, austin had called, and I was already thinking of him the whole time, wondering what he would think of all this, since he's even been skeptical about justin. that and the fact that I was breaking a promise to call my mom were bothering me a lot.
thankfully, he got the hint and said he's be on his way. he asked me if I felt better, and I said I did, and thanked him for his kindness, and then as he was leaving, he leaned in to hug me, squeezed my shoulder, and kissed me on the cheek.
I hit the panic button. I wasn't sure what to think. I went running to ashley, and she said, "did he KISS you?!" because she had supposedly heard the smacky noise. I asked her what she thought of it. I know the french kiss as a gesture, but don't the italians too? isn't it just respectful to do that, especially with the opposite sex? it's a formality, right?
maybe it's just that I don't know how to accept kindness of that degree from guys. at least in america, guys only do that unless they want something else. and I think drew's different, but for someone who's been on edge for a while now, I just kinda went floopy about it.
so. tonight is the dinner. and I'm going with austin a day early for convenience. I'm excited for the dinner, to see karl again after like 13 months and to meet kate. we're going to a nice italian restaraunt in the marina... and then he's got a film premiering soon that's going to be run with brad's new animated film... and I get to see them both at once! and bring a date! (my a-kun. look at all the fancyness we get to have, heehee.)
life.... she is craaaaaazy..... too crazy at times.....
ugh. I must eat lunch. eat lunch and watch a show that is not passions.
ANYWAY!!
so, the pen. I find a bathroom to scrub most of the ink off, but even today, there is still some of it deeply wedged into the corner of my nails.
might I add, since austin was supposed to come visit me yesterday, and come to diner with me tonight, we had to cancel our date for last night because it's too hard for him to make the pilgrimage out here three nights in a row (last night, tonight's dinner, and tomorrow to pick me up). so my a-kun went bye bye and went to work as I died a little more inside with each agonizing second of my day.
to get back to school, I was relying on the lion express shuttle. I called the info hotline for the thing and the guy told me I could expect it outside of the roaster's chicken place around 5:25. well, I go out in front of the chicken place at 5:15ish, not wanting to miss it at any costs. there's a little covering over the place to keep me dry, but it's raining and blowing wind so hard that I still can't keep dry. and, the sidewalk is so small, and the fucking suvs are driving by so fast, that I get splashed everytime someone drives by.
a man in a leather trenchcoat walks by me and points at my sandal-clad feet. "wrong shoes," he says cutely. I summon all my lasting energy to fight the urge to chase him down and pummle him with my shopping bags.
40 minutes passes before the express arrives. I'm soaked to the bone. so when I get dropped off at school, and walk the 8-minute walk from the stop to my room, I'm used to being dripping wet. rain trickles down my forehead and my toes have lost all the feeling in them.
I slop into my room and have a little down time before going to the later drawing class. my hair has puffed up and has taken the form of a dead poodle crouched on my head.
when I went to drawing, drew was there. drew is the italian exchange student who's reaaally popular with the ladies. he's an animation major and is/was in my computer class.
he came and said hi to me. he asked me why I wasn't in animation that day. I told him I withdrew. and then, all the crap festering within me kinda boiled over, and instead of opening a can of whoopass on something, my eyes started to well. I tried to hide it from drew, but he saw and leaned in to give me a hug. I actually felt really good to be hugged, be it from drew or a professor or a janitor. it meant someone was on my side, hoping for things to look up.
he tried giving me a pep talk about how he could help me with the film, how not all hope was lost. it was really sweet. I tried explaining to him what was done was done, I was out of the class, but I appreciated his help and kindness.
then, he insisted on taking me to a movie after class. "you need to do something fun," he said. "I've been able to tell that for awhile. and I want to take you out."
my jaw kinda dropped and I didn't know what to think. drew's a real friendly guy, but when do you know when friendliness stops and something else begins?
he asked me if I was 21 so he could take me to a bar. then he invited me to his apartment so he could cook me dinner. (he's a fabulous cook and baker. must be the italian in him. gotta love those people!) but I felt kinda uncomfortable about it.
then, ashley asked me if she could come over and type something on my compy after class, so I said sure. when I told drew, it was decided the 3 of us would trek to my place and hang.
we stomped through the rain, which was pouring in buckets. drew ordered pizza, which he insisted to pay for. as ashley typed, he and I watched some anime (which he's a big fan of) and adult swim. around midnight, I was really tired, and kinda just wanted to rest. plus, austin had called, and I was already thinking of him the whole time, wondering what he would think of all this, since he's even been skeptical about justin. that and the fact that I was breaking a promise to call my mom were bothering me a lot.
thankfully, he got the hint and said he's be on his way. he asked me if I felt better, and I said I did, and thanked him for his kindness, and then as he was leaving, he leaned in to hug me, squeezed my shoulder, and kissed me on the cheek.
I hit the panic button. I wasn't sure what to think. I went running to ashley, and she said, "did he KISS you?!" because she had supposedly heard the smacky noise. I asked her what she thought of it. I know the french kiss as a gesture, but don't the italians too? isn't it just respectful to do that, especially with the opposite sex? it's a formality, right?
maybe it's just that I don't know how to accept kindness of that degree from guys. at least in america, guys only do that unless they want something else. and I think drew's different, but for someone who's been on edge for a while now, I just kinda went floopy about it.
so. tonight is the dinner. and I'm going with austin a day early for convenience. I'm excited for the dinner, to see karl again after like 13 months and to meet kate. we're going to a nice italian restaraunt in the marina... and then he's got a film premiering soon that's going to be run with brad's new animated film... and I get to see them both at once! and bring a date! (my a-kun. look at all the fancyness we get to have, heehee.)
life.... she is craaaaaazy..... too crazy at times.....
ugh. I must eat lunch. eat lunch and watch a show that is not passions.