woohoo, number three baby!
I had a realization today. I have a problem. I've tried rehab, and it just doesn't work. I've tried fics. I've tried the good ol' t.v. screen, I've tried jeopardy,talking about it for hours, singing, board games, quizzes, surveys, writing, message boards! You name it and I've tried it.
I, Katie Robison, am addicted to being addicted. How does this work, you may ask. Well, I'll tell you. I seem to be happiest when I have something to obsess over. First, it was passions. I talked about it constantly! I even came up with crazy plot line ideas like Ivy getting a black nose. I once watched it late at night and did the dialogue for a scene with a friend. When the writers would upset me, I would even talk of shooting them (as a joke). It was a dark time in my life, and it pains me to speak of it, but I want to help. I want to prevent it from happening to other impressionable young women. I want to teach them the pain and heartbreak that comes from these obsessesions, so that they can maybe learn from my mistakes.
I started out with the soft stuff, a little Passions here, a little Friends there. But then it stopped being enough, it stopped giving me the laughs it used to. That's when I moved on to Velvet Goldmine, Stand By Me, and River Phoenix. People tried to help me, they said, "Katie! Stop while you can! Go outside! Get sunlight!" But by then it was too late, I watched t.v. all day long. I can still remember the first time I muted Stand By Me and read the lines myself with my two sisters...that's when I knew there was no turning back.
That's when I started the hard stuff. I was at my friends house and I picked up "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone". It seemed innocent enough. I told myself I was only going to read a few pages. But once I started, I couldn't stop. What with, Hermy, and Ron, and Viktor, and Ginny, and REMUS, I just couldn't get enough. I remember those three long weeks I waited for POA like it was yesterday. I would stay up late at night, shaking from withdrawal. It seemed like I had hit rock bottom. There was no hope. But at least it couldn't get any worse, right?
Wrong! One day it happened, my sister read a fic for Stand By Me, and we discovered, ::sob:: I'm sorry, this is hard to say...SLASH! I started sinking, and fast. There was no talking sense to me. I started hallucinating regularly, seeing slash everywhere I went. I would watch completely straight things, and all I could see was the boy on boy potential. My friends gave up on me and dubbed me a 'faghag'.
Here I am, years later, and I see no end in sight. We've tried all sorts of therapy. Parties. A school play. Movies. Card Games. All sorts of social interactions. But at the end of the day, I still come home to the same things. Slash and Harry Potter. So all I can say is kids, just say no. When your friend shows you a manga and tell you it's "the cool thing to do", run!
There are many tactics to staying slash-free. There's the cold shoulder tactic, staying in groups, and when worst comes to worse, use the 'I feel' sentences. Ex: When you try to give me a Harry Potter ticket, I feel threatened. These seem to work particularly well. And the best tactic we have found yet........Have a life.
So stay clean, stay straight, and stay smart.
I, Katie Robison, am addicted to being addicted. How does this work, you may ask. Well, I'll tell you. I seem to be happiest when I have something to obsess over. First, it was passions. I talked about it constantly! I even came up with crazy plot line ideas like Ivy getting a black nose. I once watched it late at night and did the dialogue for a scene with a friend. When the writers would upset me, I would even talk of shooting them (as a joke). It was a dark time in my life, and it pains me to speak of it, but I want to help. I want to prevent it from happening to other impressionable young women. I want to teach them the pain and heartbreak that comes from these obsessesions, so that they can maybe learn from my mistakes.
I started out with the soft stuff, a little Passions here, a little Friends there. But then it stopped being enough, it stopped giving me the laughs it used to. That's when I moved on to Velvet Goldmine, Stand By Me, and River Phoenix. People tried to help me, they said, "Katie! Stop while you can! Go outside! Get sunlight!" But by then it was too late, I watched t.v. all day long. I can still remember the first time I muted Stand By Me and read the lines myself with my two sisters...that's when I knew there was no turning back.
That's when I started the hard stuff. I was at my friends house and I picked up "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone". It seemed innocent enough. I told myself I was only going to read a few pages. But once I started, I couldn't stop. What with, Hermy, and Ron, and Viktor, and Ginny, and REMUS, I just couldn't get enough. I remember those three long weeks I waited for POA like it was yesterday. I would stay up late at night, shaking from withdrawal. It seemed like I had hit rock bottom. There was no hope. But at least it couldn't get any worse, right?
Wrong! One day it happened, my sister read a fic for Stand By Me, and we discovered, ::sob:: I'm sorry, this is hard to say...SLASH! I started sinking, and fast. There was no talking sense to me. I started hallucinating regularly, seeing slash everywhere I went. I would watch completely straight things, and all I could see was the boy on boy potential. My friends gave up on me and dubbed me a 'faghag'.
Here I am, years later, and I see no end in sight. We've tried all sorts of therapy. Parties. A school play. Movies. Card Games. All sorts of social interactions. But at the end of the day, I still come home to the same things. Slash and Harry Potter. So all I can say is kids, just say no. When your friend shows you a manga and tell you it's "the cool thing to do", run!
There are many tactics to staying slash-free. There's the cold shoulder tactic, staying in groups, and when worst comes to worse, use the 'I feel' sentences. Ex: When you try to give me a Harry Potter ticket, I feel threatened. These seem to work particularly well. And the best tactic we have found yet........Have a life.
So stay clean, stay straight, and stay smart.