just me ranting
I’m so sick of this
Everything’s the same.
From day to day, there are peaks, but in general, life is just so dull.
School is the biggest thing in my life right now, and I don’t want it to be like that.
I am so sick of everyday blending with the rest, I’m so sick of every weekend being the same; I cannot stand where my life’s heading right now.
Know where its heading? Its flat lining, it has been for the last 5 or 6 years.
My tolerance for the routine of school gets shorter every year, and this year it ran out about 2 months ago.
I absolutely cannot handle this much longer, you can think whatever you want to about me.
I know it’s bad because when I ask myself “what do you have to look forward to tomorrow?”
I can’t answer
“What do you have to look forward to in the next few weeks?”
I can’t answer
“What HAVE you had that you can remember in your life?”
I can’t answer
Everyday is blending together, even my friends are all the same, yes they have their highs and lows, and each is different, but really...
If you zoom out on my life, my entire life it’s just a blob of grey.
Yes, there are peaks, there are low points, there are big changes, and here they are:
The change from elementary school to middle school
Same life for 2 years
Change to high school
Hell for a year
Change to waynflete
it seems everyone aroud me has something they love doing, they love it. they get something out of it, they get sastifaction, they feel they have helped someone, or acomplished something big.
I suppose everyone has a change when they move out, but I’m so sick of waiting, I know everyone goes through this or whatever, but I honestly, cannot go on waiting for something big to change.
I’m so sick and tired of having no variety in this life.
I don’t necessarily want to GO somewhere else, maybe I’m looking to BE someone else, and honestly I have no clue.
All I know is that this cannot go on, because it’s not worth it to me, life right now, is not really worth living.
And don’t take that in the emo “I’m going to kill myself” way, take in that I’ve really got nothing going for me, and you can argue that all you want, and you can get everyone in the world backing your side, but it comes down to me, and there is nothing that I have, in my opinion, that is really worth it.
And so I’m going to change it.
Because it needs to be done, it’s that simple.
(cross posted)
Everything’s the same.
From day to day, there are peaks, but in general, life is just so dull.
School is the biggest thing in my life right now, and I don’t want it to be like that.
I am so sick of everyday blending with the rest, I’m so sick of every weekend being the same; I cannot stand where my life’s heading right now.
Know where its heading? Its flat lining, it has been for the last 5 or 6 years.
My tolerance for the routine of school gets shorter every year, and this year it ran out about 2 months ago.
I absolutely cannot handle this much longer, you can think whatever you want to about me.
I know it’s bad because when I ask myself “what do you have to look forward to tomorrow?”
I can’t answer
“What do you have to look forward to in the next few weeks?”
I can’t answer
“What HAVE you had that you can remember in your life?”
I can’t answer
Everyday is blending together, even my friends are all the same, yes they have their highs and lows, and each is different, but really...
If you zoom out on my life, my entire life it’s just a blob of grey.
Yes, there are peaks, there are low points, there are big changes, and here they are:
The change from elementary school to middle school
Same life for 2 years
Change to high school
Hell for a year
Change to waynflete
it seems everyone aroud me has something they love doing, they love it. they get something out of it, they get sastifaction, they feel they have helped someone, or acomplished something big.
I suppose everyone has a change when they move out, but I’m so sick of waiting, I know everyone goes through this or whatever, but I honestly, cannot go on waiting for something big to change.
I’m so sick and tired of having no variety in this life.
I don’t necessarily want to GO somewhere else, maybe I’m looking to BE someone else, and honestly I have no clue.
All I know is that this cannot go on, because it’s not worth it to me, life right now, is not really worth living.
And don’t take that in the emo “I’m going to kill myself” way, take in that I’ve really got nothing going for me, and you can argue that all you want, and you can get everyone in the world backing your side, but it comes down to me, and there is nothing that I have, in my opinion, that is really worth it.
And so I’m going to change it.
Because it needs to be done, it’s that simple.
(cross posted)