nice guys...
being a nice guy rarely pays off. but it's a curse i have to deal with. better to be this way, than be a dickhead. i guess. not much else to report. i do have a part time job now working the door at Dillinger's/Bootlegger's. easy work, decent pay. and now i will leave you with a couple of song lyrics that struck me lately
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I am sorry trav, I am so so so so sorry. All I want to see for you is for you to be happy. But I do think many times you sit back and wait to show yourself to someone. I think you have come a very long way at letting yourself show and not get walked all over on. When I said more action less discussion... that is kinda what I was going for.
I don't think that you have it in you to be a dickhead. but try just once thinking of yourself first instead of others. When you want something, really really want something. Go for it, don't analyze it, don't think about it, don't talk about it. Just go for it. The only reason marc and I lasted the first 3-6 months was because I never had a chance to fuck it up. I never had the chance to think about it. we just kept moving forward and I didn't get the chance to analyze it untill I was hooked and couldn't explain it. This from the girl who analyzes what she is analyzes. Who can't sleep cause she can't shut her brain up... I think I can kinda understand all the shit that goes on in your head... ok clearly not all of it, but I think I kinda get it.
So from someone who just wants to see you happy and succeeding.... I echo karen, stand up as an alpha male once in a while (trust me it will be HOT), think only of yourself sometime(it's ok you are important enough :) ), and just go with something before you have the chance to over think it.
Love you lots, so sorry you are watching something pass by that you wanted for yourself....
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