How It Always Should Have Been Chapter 8/?
American Idol 8 RPF: How It Always Should Have Been Chapter 8/?
Author:glambertgalore
Pairing: Kradam, who else?
Summary: How Kradam finally got together and their lives after.
Rating: NC-17 overall
Warnings: Angst, cuz that's how I like to roll.
Beta: My wonderfully supportive friend laurahellomoto
Disclaimer: I do not know these people, and this was just done for fun, and no profit. If you got here by googling yourself or someone you know, for the love of every diety I don't believe in leave now.
Author's Notes: Eight is up a lot sooner than I expected because I've been exempted from a couple of finals! so yay. Nine will be up by the end of the week. Also, look for an HS AU that is being written for a wonderful new friend that generously donated to a suicide prevention program in exchange for the fic. She wishes to remain anonymous, but she knows who she is, and I want to give a great big thank you and a shout out for that, as bullying and suicide are issues that are very near and dear to my heart. Hope you all enjoy this installment, and will read the HS AU when it goes up!
Master Post for this fic:
glambertgalore.livejournal.com/1693.html
How It Always Should Have Been Chapter 8/?
Adam sat up in bed next to Kris on the last day before they were due to leave for their much anticipated vacation. He was online, his laptop balanced on his legs, as Lane had called and told him that the press release concerning Kris's coming out and their relationship had hit the airwaves on the internet at midnight, and all the morning news shows had picked it up for their entertainment segments. Taking a deep breath, he glanced over at the still sleeping Kris, and went to TMZ.com. That was sure to be the most brutal, and it would be all uphill from there.
“Kradam Finally Goes Public!” the headline screamed. Adam scanned the article. It had the usual catty tabloid tone, proclaiming that it was about time. Other than subtly insinuating that he and Kris had lied, the article stuck to the facts, and it was a pretty painless read. Adam breathed a sigh of relief, until he got to the comment section. He had expected some overjoyed Kradam fan girls, and maybe a bit of finger-wagging from people that disagreed with homosexuality, but he had certainly not expected a page full of hate from people that all but told him and Kris to go burn in hell. Some even accused Adam and Hollywood of turning a good Christian boy into a heathen, just as Charles had.
“Both Lambert and Allen are going straight to hell, right where they belong. I thought I was making the right choice by voting for Allen, but it turns out I was just voting for a sinner in disguise.”
“American Idol indeed. Who would want their kid idolizing someone who takes it up the ass and claims to love Jesus in the same breath? It doesn't even make sense to say you're both queer and Chrisitan.”
“God help this world. We're now letting fags parade and glorify their sick lifestyles and claim God is ok with it? What next? Burning the flag and saying its patriotic?”
“The fact that this fruitcake is our American Idol has made me lose faith in all that was ever good and decent about this country. What happened to good old fashioned Christian American values?”
“I thought Kris Allen had a strong faith in the Lord. Guess he lied about that as well as his wife. Were they ever even really married? Someone should investigate that. If they were, I pity her having to suffer this humiliation.”
“Hope he didn't give his wife AIDS while he was cutting out on her with that Lambert fag. Get tested, Mrs. Allen.”
“Lambert is charming, so I don't blame Kris. He was hoodwinked by the devil.”
It went on and on, and Adam felt sicker and sicker to his stomach. Without taking his eyes off the screen, he shook Kris, more violently than he meant to, to wake him.
“Baby, I think we should leave town tonight if we can. Look at these comments. Who knows what's circulating around town right now, especially after what your dad did to Charles yesterday.”
Kris sat up in bed and took the laptop from Adam. Adam watched him carefully to see his reaction, ready to calm him if he was unable to take it. Kris's face reddened, but that was it. Finally, he closed the laptop, and, to Adam's surprise, looked up, smiling.
“It's ok, Adam,” he said soothingly. “I've made my peace with this, and with the world. I can't pretend it doesn't sting to read stuff like that, but it'll blow over. I'd rather get rid of the fans that have an issue with this, with us, now, so that we can get on with our lives. We've already weeded out the so- called friends and townspeople that we don't need. Now we are working on the world at large. I do want to show this to my parents and your mom though, so that they aren't blindsided by any nastiness that might come their way. But it's still early. I'm gonna use the bathroom, and then we can hang out in bed for a bit.”
With that, Kris went to the bathroom, and Adam sat there, thinking back through the events from the time Kris had showed up on his doorstep, soaking wet, declaring his love for Adam, all the way up to Kris's confrontation with Charles. He still had a few questions, and he intended to ask them as soon as Kris emerged from the bathroom.
“Baby,” Adam murmured when Kris reached the bed. He pulled Kris close, kissing him tenderly, and then said, “There are a few things I've been thinking of since you confronted Charles yesterday. Why didn't you tell me about Ian? Did you think I'd be jealous or something? And when did you really know you were gay? The way you put it to me made it sound like your mom knew, but that you didn't acknowledge it yourself. None of it really matters, I'm just curious.”
Kris looked a little worried, then said, “Adam, I didn't tell you about Ian because he isn't important. He was the catalyst for me realizing that perhaps something was different, and around age fourteen I knew what it was. I wasn't close to him or anything; I, and the rest of the team, were too jealous of his skills on the baseball field to even speak to him unless we absolutely had to. Between the ages of twelve and fourteen, I looked at countless boys in a more than friendly way without even realizing it. It was just natural, you know? And I buried it enough to date and marry Katy. But like I said, I always knew. I gave Charles that version because I wanted to leave nothing out, and I wanted him to have something tangible from our past, something that would tell him, 'hey, I'm still the same person. There was just something you didn't know about me. I'm not the one that is changing things here. You are.'”
Adam was satisfied with that explanation. “Ok, I get it now. You knew I'd believe you, so you didn't need to include all that. Thanks.”
By the time their little talk was over, it was nearly 10 AM, and the boys could hear their parents moving around downstairs.
After showering together and dressing, they went down to join them, Adam with his laptop in tow. After helping themselves to the hearty breakfast Leila and Kim had prepared, Adam and Kris shared a look, and without uttering a word, decided to show them the TMZ article with the ugly comments. They couldn't let them leave the house without knowing that the news of their relationship had gone global, and that it was very possible that many in the town would scorn them all.
“Guys, we've got a bit of news,” Adam began cautiously.
“What news, dear?” Leila asked absently, sipping her coffee.
“Well,” Kris said, “before we left LA, Adam and I spoke with Gina and Lane. They prepared a statement for the media about our relationship. It's all over the internet. While the articles don't have an accusing tone, the comments certainly do. We just wanted to warn you.”
Kim, who had been sipping on a fresh cup of coffee, froze with the cup halfway to her mouth.
“Let me see that,” she snapped, and without further ado, took the laptop from where it lay by Adam's plate and opened it. “Password?” she asked. “You can change it when I'm done.”
Adam knew better than to argue when Kim sounded like that. “Glitter, all caps,” he told her.
Kim typed the password and Adam knew that she would immediately see the comments section of the TMZ article, as he and Kris hadn't closed the browser. Kim's face seemed to grow redder and redder, and deep frown lines appeared between her brows. Finally, she closed the laptop and set it back next to Adam's plate. “That is some of the most vile, disgusting nonsense I have ever seen in my entire life, and I forbid either of you to read any more of it. Is that clear?”
Adam looked at Kris. Of course they couldn't avoid the backlash from their coming out altogether, and they would have to know exactly what had been said and by whom before they let any magazine or talk show host interview them. They couldn't do press uninformed. But arguing with Kim Allen when she was in angry mama bear mode would do no good, so they promised to stay off the internet and to ignore their own press.
Both Neil and Leila had been silent throughout the exchange, but finally, Leila spoke. “Kim, we can't shield them completely. I agree that for the duration of their vacation, they need to give up modern technology. No facebook, fan sites, news articles-especially of the online variety with comment sections-no tabloids, and certainly no twitter. That particular service is the absolute devil at the best of times, not to mention during something like this. But, eventually, there will be press to be done, and the fans deserve to have their questions answered. They can't hide from the ugliness of this forever.”
Kim sighed. “You're right, of course. But, boys, you at least deserve a vacation free of this. Promise me to stay off the net while you're abroad?” She looked at them both, pleading with her eyes.
Kris finally spoke up, obviously unable to see his mother so worried. “Mama, this isn't easy. But we knew it wouldn't be easy. But yes, no technology while on vacation. I think that had already been the unspoken plan anyway. Besides, we have each other to keep ourselves busy.”
Then, much to his mother's dismay, Kris winked suggestively.
Kim bristled. “Young man, I did not need to get that mental picture! But I am glad the comments there didn't bother you as much as they bothered me. However, I know this will get much more difficult before it gets easier. All I can do is thank God the two of you live in LA rather than here. That must count for something.”
With that, Kim stood and cleared the table, taking the dishes into the kitchen from the dining room, obviously looking for something to do and some time alone, so no one followed her or offered to help. Only after his wife was out of earshot did Neil Allen speak.
“I think your mother already knew about the storm of hate coming this way,” Neil said sadly, looking at Kris. “She went out for more eggs early this morning and saw Rachel Browder in the supermarket. Needless to say, after yesterday's episode, Rachel is none too happy with any of us. She is even less happy that when she and Charles apparently tried to file a police report, they were told that while violence is never the answer, that Charles provoked the incident with his hateful words, both at the party and the day after. Didn't even need that favor from Chief Peterson. Everyone, even the people that think you and Adam are wrong for what you are doing, thinks that Charles's attempting to humiliate you in front of an entire town is just as bad. So they don't have a leg to stand on as far as justifying Charles's actions go. But I think Rachel said quite a few things that upset Kim. She wouldn't tell me what the words were, so they must have been bad.”
Adam sighed. “Neil, Kris and I had this very conversation the night you came to get us from the airport. We feared this would happen. The last thing we wanted to do was upset your life with our decisions, and now we have. I'm sorry.”
Neil looked at Adam in shock. “Sorry? You boys have nothing to be sorry for. It's those disgusting, small minded bigots who should be sorry. We may not be able to change their minds, but we can shun them just as they have shunned you. You did us a favor. You helped us figure out who we need to cut out of our lives. For that, I thank you. We are all better people because of this. Now, are you all packed? You have to be at the airport at 4 tomorrow morning.”
Just as Adam, Kris, and Neil were standing to leave the table, Kim emerged from the kitchen. Her eyes had a noticeable red tinge that more than likely meant that she had been crying under the guise of doing the breakfast dishes. Adam felt a pang of guilt. He loved Kim Allen as if she were his own mother. He hated to see her in pain, especially pain that he had helped cause, even if it wasn't really his fault. Yeah, that vacation time with Kris was looking better by the second, and he began counting the hours right then and there.
Leila stayed behind at the dining room table with Kim, while Neil and the boys retired to the living room.
Kris looked nervous to Adam, and it was confirmed when he spoke. “Adam, as usual you were right. This is affecting my family. I think a month away, time for everything to settle down, will do everyone some good.”
Kris turned to Neil. “Dad, what do you say to Adam and I sending you and Mom on a little vacation? If you're here while we're away we'll worry. Please consider just taking some time. We need it, but I think you guys are gonna need it too.”
Adam looked at Kris, his heart swelling with love for his generous boyfriend. Of course, they had not discussed financing a vacation for Kris's parents in order to take them away from the bigotry they were sure to face as a result of the coming out, but of course he would have no objection, and would gladly bankroll it.
“Son, that is a very generous offer, and after this morning your mother could definitely use some time away, no doubt...” Neil trailed off, obviously thinking about the suggestion.
Finally, he said, “I think its a great idea, but you boys don't have to pay for it. Kim will think it's because you are feeling guilty, and that will make her feel even worse. Let me talk to her, but I kind of think I might just insist on it. She doesn't need another incident like this morning any time soon.”
After a few more minutes of chatting, Adam and Kris went upstairs to start tracking down everything that had been scattered around the guest room and bathroom during their stay with the Allens in anticipation of their flight the next morning, only hoping that Neil and Kim would either be on it with them, or on one of their own to someplace peaceful. Only time would tell whether or not their vacation offer would be accepted, but one thing was certain: they could all use a little peace.
Author:glambertgalore
Pairing: Kradam, who else?
Summary: How Kradam finally got together and their lives after.
Rating: NC-17 overall
Warnings: Angst, cuz that's how I like to roll.
Beta: My wonderfully supportive friend laurahellomoto
Disclaimer: I do not know these people, and this was just done for fun, and no profit. If you got here by googling yourself or someone you know, for the love of every diety I don't believe in leave now.
Author's Notes: Eight is up a lot sooner than I expected because I've been exempted from a couple of finals! so yay. Nine will be up by the end of the week. Also, look for an HS AU that is being written for a wonderful new friend that generously donated to a suicide prevention program in exchange for the fic. She wishes to remain anonymous, but she knows who she is, and I want to give a great big thank you and a shout out for that, as bullying and suicide are issues that are very near and dear to my heart. Hope you all enjoy this installment, and will read the HS AU when it goes up!
Master Post for this fic:
glambertgalore.livejournal.com/1693.html
How It Always Should Have Been Chapter 8/?
Adam sat up in bed next to Kris on the last day before they were due to leave for their much anticipated vacation. He was online, his laptop balanced on his legs, as Lane had called and told him that the press release concerning Kris's coming out and their relationship had hit the airwaves on the internet at midnight, and all the morning news shows had picked it up for their entertainment segments. Taking a deep breath, he glanced over at the still sleeping Kris, and went to TMZ.com. That was sure to be the most brutal, and it would be all uphill from there.
“Kradam Finally Goes Public!” the headline screamed. Adam scanned the article. It had the usual catty tabloid tone, proclaiming that it was about time. Other than subtly insinuating that he and Kris had lied, the article stuck to the facts, and it was a pretty painless read. Adam breathed a sigh of relief, until he got to the comment section. He had expected some overjoyed Kradam fan girls, and maybe a bit of finger-wagging from people that disagreed with homosexuality, but he had certainly not expected a page full of hate from people that all but told him and Kris to go burn in hell. Some even accused Adam and Hollywood of turning a good Christian boy into a heathen, just as Charles had.
“Both Lambert and Allen are going straight to hell, right where they belong. I thought I was making the right choice by voting for Allen, but it turns out I was just voting for a sinner in disguise.”
“American Idol indeed. Who would want their kid idolizing someone who takes it up the ass and claims to love Jesus in the same breath? It doesn't even make sense to say you're both queer and Chrisitan.”
“God help this world. We're now letting fags parade and glorify their sick lifestyles and claim God is ok with it? What next? Burning the flag and saying its patriotic?”
“The fact that this fruitcake is our American Idol has made me lose faith in all that was ever good and decent about this country. What happened to good old fashioned Christian American values?”
“I thought Kris Allen had a strong faith in the Lord. Guess he lied about that as well as his wife. Were they ever even really married? Someone should investigate that. If they were, I pity her having to suffer this humiliation.”
“Hope he didn't give his wife AIDS while he was cutting out on her with that Lambert fag. Get tested, Mrs. Allen.”
“Lambert is charming, so I don't blame Kris. He was hoodwinked by the devil.”
It went on and on, and Adam felt sicker and sicker to his stomach. Without taking his eyes off the screen, he shook Kris, more violently than he meant to, to wake him.
“Baby, I think we should leave town tonight if we can. Look at these comments. Who knows what's circulating around town right now, especially after what your dad did to Charles yesterday.”
Kris sat up in bed and took the laptop from Adam. Adam watched him carefully to see his reaction, ready to calm him if he was unable to take it. Kris's face reddened, but that was it. Finally, he closed the laptop, and, to Adam's surprise, looked up, smiling.
“It's ok, Adam,” he said soothingly. “I've made my peace with this, and with the world. I can't pretend it doesn't sting to read stuff like that, but it'll blow over. I'd rather get rid of the fans that have an issue with this, with us, now, so that we can get on with our lives. We've already weeded out the so- called friends and townspeople that we don't need. Now we are working on the world at large. I do want to show this to my parents and your mom though, so that they aren't blindsided by any nastiness that might come their way. But it's still early. I'm gonna use the bathroom, and then we can hang out in bed for a bit.”
With that, Kris went to the bathroom, and Adam sat there, thinking back through the events from the time Kris had showed up on his doorstep, soaking wet, declaring his love for Adam, all the way up to Kris's confrontation with Charles. He still had a few questions, and he intended to ask them as soon as Kris emerged from the bathroom.
“Baby,” Adam murmured when Kris reached the bed. He pulled Kris close, kissing him tenderly, and then said, “There are a few things I've been thinking of since you confronted Charles yesterday. Why didn't you tell me about Ian? Did you think I'd be jealous or something? And when did you really know you were gay? The way you put it to me made it sound like your mom knew, but that you didn't acknowledge it yourself. None of it really matters, I'm just curious.”
Kris looked a little worried, then said, “Adam, I didn't tell you about Ian because he isn't important. He was the catalyst for me realizing that perhaps something was different, and around age fourteen I knew what it was. I wasn't close to him or anything; I, and the rest of the team, were too jealous of his skills on the baseball field to even speak to him unless we absolutely had to. Between the ages of twelve and fourteen, I looked at countless boys in a more than friendly way without even realizing it. It was just natural, you know? And I buried it enough to date and marry Katy. But like I said, I always knew. I gave Charles that version because I wanted to leave nothing out, and I wanted him to have something tangible from our past, something that would tell him, 'hey, I'm still the same person. There was just something you didn't know about me. I'm not the one that is changing things here. You are.'”
Adam was satisfied with that explanation. “Ok, I get it now. You knew I'd believe you, so you didn't need to include all that. Thanks.”
By the time their little talk was over, it was nearly 10 AM, and the boys could hear their parents moving around downstairs.
After showering together and dressing, they went down to join them, Adam with his laptop in tow. After helping themselves to the hearty breakfast Leila and Kim had prepared, Adam and Kris shared a look, and without uttering a word, decided to show them the TMZ article with the ugly comments. They couldn't let them leave the house without knowing that the news of their relationship had gone global, and that it was very possible that many in the town would scorn them all.
“Guys, we've got a bit of news,” Adam began cautiously.
“What news, dear?” Leila asked absently, sipping her coffee.
“Well,” Kris said, “before we left LA, Adam and I spoke with Gina and Lane. They prepared a statement for the media about our relationship. It's all over the internet. While the articles don't have an accusing tone, the comments certainly do. We just wanted to warn you.”
Kim, who had been sipping on a fresh cup of coffee, froze with the cup halfway to her mouth.
“Let me see that,” she snapped, and without further ado, took the laptop from where it lay by Adam's plate and opened it. “Password?” she asked. “You can change it when I'm done.”
Adam knew better than to argue when Kim sounded like that. “Glitter, all caps,” he told her.
Kim typed the password and Adam knew that she would immediately see the comments section of the TMZ article, as he and Kris hadn't closed the browser. Kim's face seemed to grow redder and redder, and deep frown lines appeared between her brows. Finally, she closed the laptop and set it back next to Adam's plate. “That is some of the most vile, disgusting nonsense I have ever seen in my entire life, and I forbid either of you to read any more of it. Is that clear?”
Adam looked at Kris. Of course they couldn't avoid the backlash from their coming out altogether, and they would have to know exactly what had been said and by whom before they let any magazine or talk show host interview them. They couldn't do press uninformed. But arguing with Kim Allen when she was in angry mama bear mode would do no good, so they promised to stay off the internet and to ignore their own press.
Both Neil and Leila had been silent throughout the exchange, but finally, Leila spoke. “Kim, we can't shield them completely. I agree that for the duration of their vacation, they need to give up modern technology. No facebook, fan sites, news articles-especially of the online variety with comment sections-no tabloids, and certainly no twitter. That particular service is the absolute devil at the best of times, not to mention during something like this. But, eventually, there will be press to be done, and the fans deserve to have their questions answered. They can't hide from the ugliness of this forever.”
Kim sighed. “You're right, of course. But, boys, you at least deserve a vacation free of this. Promise me to stay off the net while you're abroad?” She looked at them both, pleading with her eyes.
Kris finally spoke up, obviously unable to see his mother so worried. “Mama, this isn't easy. But we knew it wouldn't be easy. But yes, no technology while on vacation. I think that had already been the unspoken plan anyway. Besides, we have each other to keep ourselves busy.”
Then, much to his mother's dismay, Kris winked suggestively.
Kim bristled. “Young man, I did not need to get that mental picture! But I am glad the comments there didn't bother you as much as they bothered me. However, I know this will get much more difficult before it gets easier. All I can do is thank God the two of you live in LA rather than here. That must count for something.”
With that, Kim stood and cleared the table, taking the dishes into the kitchen from the dining room, obviously looking for something to do and some time alone, so no one followed her or offered to help. Only after his wife was out of earshot did Neil Allen speak.
“I think your mother already knew about the storm of hate coming this way,” Neil said sadly, looking at Kris. “She went out for more eggs early this morning and saw Rachel Browder in the supermarket. Needless to say, after yesterday's episode, Rachel is none too happy with any of us. She is even less happy that when she and Charles apparently tried to file a police report, they were told that while violence is never the answer, that Charles provoked the incident with his hateful words, both at the party and the day after. Didn't even need that favor from Chief Peterson. Everyone, even the people that think you and Adam are wrong for what you are doing, thinks that Charles's attempting to humiliate you in front of an entire town is just as bad. So they don't have a leg to stand on as far as justifying Charles's actions go. But I think Rachel said quite a few things that upset Kim. She wouldn't tell me what the words were, so they must have been bad.”
Adam sighed. “Neil, Kris and I had this very conversation the night you came to get us from the airport. We feared this would happen. The last thing we wanted to do was upset your life with our decisions, and now we have. I'm sorry.”
Neil looked at Adam in shock. “Sorry? You boys have nothing to be sorry for. It's those disgusting, small minded bigots who should be sorry. We may not be able to change their minds, but we can shun them just as they have shunned you. You did us a favor. You helped us figure out who we need to cut out of our lives. For that, I thank you. We are all better people because of this. Now, are you all packed? You have to be at the airport at 4 tomorrow morning.”
Just as Adam, Kris, and Neil were standing to leave the table, Kim emerged from the kitchen. Her eyes had a noticeable red tinge that more than likely meant that she had been crying under the guise of doing the breakfast dishes. Adam felt a pang of guilt. He loved Kim Allen as if she were his own mother. He hated to see her in pain, especially pain that he had helped cause, even if it wasn't really his fault. Yeah, that vacation time with Kris was looking better by the second, and he began counting the hours right then and there.
Leila stayed behind at the dining room table with Kim, while Neil and the boys retired to the living room.
Kris looked nervous to Adam, and it was confirmed when he spoke. “Adam, as usual you were right. This is affecting my family. I think a month away, time for everything to settle down, will do everyone some good.”
Kris turned to Neil. “Dad, what do you say to Adam and I sending you and Mom on a little vacation? If you're here while we're away we'll worry. Please consider just taking some time. We need it, but I think you guys are gonna need it too.”
Adam looked at Kris, his heart swelling with love for his generous boyfriend. Of course, they had not discussed financing a vacation for Kris's parents in order to take them away from the bigotry they were sure to face as a result of the coming out, but of course he would have no objection, and would gladly bankroll it.
“Son, that is a very generous offer, and after this morning your mother could definitely use some time away, no doubt...” Neil trailed off, obviously thinking about the suggestion.
Finally, he said, “I think its a great idea, but you boys don't have to pay for it. Kim will think it's because you are feeling guilty, and that will make her feel even worse. Let me talk to her, but I kind of think I might just insist on it. She doesn't need another incident like this morning any time soon.”
After a few more minutes of chatting, Adam and Kris went upstairs to start tracking down everything that had been scattered around the guest room and bathroom during their stay with the Allens in anticipation of their flight the next morning, only hoping that Neil and Kim would either be on it with them, or on one of their own to someplace peaceful. Only time would tell whether or not their vacation offer would be accepted, but one thing was certain: they could all use a little peace.